When I was an undergraduate, I met Lu Yi, not very familiar, probably the kind of "in fact, we didn't talk" unfamiliar.
Once forgetting what the reason was, we went to supper together and asked for a few bottles of beer. Lu Yi, who was diligent and simple, suddenly moved at that time, drank a little and began to talk, it seemed that he usually suppressed too much, and did not spit unhappily. I understand him very well, because I also like to drink, and I like to talk nonsense when I drink too much, and I am also very ugly, so I reluctantly listen to him.
However, as we talked, the past and the future began to mingle in his words. He first said that his former high school classmates liked him very much and were willing to call him "Lao Lu", which made him feel very kind; then said that he felt that he would not have such good friends in the future, and the people who were willing to drink with him made him feel worth making friends; later he began to say that a girl was very good to him, and he also liked the girl.
He said he was going to confess to the girl.
Another classmate and I, out of concern for watching the hilarity and not being too big a thing, helped him make an appointment with this girl, let him have a good chat with people, and did not allow him to drink crazy. We both watched from a distance, until the girl left, and Lu Yi was quite calm. We thought it was done, walked over to Lu Yi, and just wanted to celebrate, Lu Yi began to throw wine crazy out of control.
It turns out that the reservedness after the loss of love is particularly pretend.
There was no way, so another classmate and I didn't say a word and sent him back to his dormitory to heal his wounds. At 2 a.m., we hoisted him up to the bedroom building. Lu Yi was not only heavy, but also infinitely powerful, and he also borrowed wine to get out of the air and sprinkled tricks. Traffickers abduct stinky hooligans, probably not so troublesome. When we got to his house, we hurriedly threw this burden to his terrified and disgusted roommate. We naively thought it was over. Back in the house to sleep hastily, there is still a sense of impermanence.
Dormitory downstairs
At 6 a.m., someone outside the dormitory building seemed to be calling out to me.
At first, I wasn't quite sure, because I was shouting "Old Yu" or something, which seemed to be a name that I didn't want others to know that it was me, so what was the purpose of calling me like this?
Curiously, I got up and dressed, listened again, and finally confirmed that this was Lu Yi. I woke up another classmate, thinking that Lu Yi was probably upset again? Still need comfort after waking up at 6 a.m.? All right! So I walked out of the bedroom building.
At that time, there were fallen leaves on the ground, and Lu Yi was lying in the fallen leaves, but there was no beauty at all, because he was ugly, and the strength of the obvious hangover had not passed, and the figure lying on the ground was sloppy and sloppy, and it was writhing with nonsense.
I shouted twice when I went out, and he sat up, looked straight at me, and then suddenly began to accuse me coldly. He asked me why I had called the girl out last night when he was drunk, that he had messed it up, that he couldn't face the girl, and that the more he talked, the more excited he became, the louder he became.
At that moment, my anger came up. I looked at this boy with disheveled hair and beard, who had in the corners of his eyes, but did not dare to take responsibility for his appearance, and felt that his actions last night were a waste of life. But turning my head and thinking about it, I deserve it, and now what do I have to say?
But I still feel sad, I feel that a boy who looks as ugly as me has encountered such a thing, but he makes such a choice, it seems that God has hinted to me in the dark that I may take a path, and told me, "Don't take this road."
So I said to this boy, where do you love to make trouble, and you will bother me less in the future. There seemed to be a sudden flash of reluctance in his eyes, and I turned my head and entered the bedroom building. Taking off the clothes that took half a day to wear, a feeling rose in my heart that "it is a waste of life to get up in the morning to get dressed and take off and take off heavy sleep" in my heart.
Within ten minutes, I heard Lu Yi's voice outside the building again. He shouted the girl's name at the girls' building on the edge of our building, and then the three big words "I love you", with the arrogance of the wine and the hoarseness of the small tongue, in the early morning campus, shocking my soul that was going to sleep.
At noon that day, I went to the next bedroom to visit the door, and the friend who lived in the next bedroom laughed and said to me, are people crazy now, what a roar in the morning, too unqualified. Since then, I have never heard anything about Lu Yi.
A long time later, one of my sisters told me that the place where she worked came from a brother of the same department as me, a workaholic, hard-working, simple, and everyone admired him, but he was not very close to him, and he did not seem to be very close to others. I had no interest in this man, and casually asked for his name out of courtesy—I found out that it was Lu Yi.
So I suddenly remembered the buddy lying on the ground in front of my dormitory. He shaved his beard, cut his hair, washed the corners of his eyes, wiped his mouth with a tissue, then put on a suit, made a pair of leather shoes, tied a tie, or didn't, loosened the first button of the neckline, and then put on a look, should, well, should be enough to get the admiration that he deserves in this outfit. But it always felt as if something was missing. What's missing? I can't say it again.
For example, one of my disciples. He was not the same as Lu Yi, he was a kind and easy-going person, at least to me. At that time, he shouted one by one, and I felt that he was too polite and not casual enough, but he was also very comfortable in this politeness. I've seen him in a suit and leather, but he can handle whatever he wears on any occasion, because he's as ugly as me, so ugly and unsaved.
Later, he fell in love. It is said that he won the girl's heart by crying and sending a message and calling. It sounds uncomfortable, it feels like a weak spoiling and a resolute masochism. All in all, he talked about a shameless love affair so disgracefully. The year he graduated, I caught a glimpse of him at the door of the cafeteria, and he had the big words "I am happy" on his face.
Perhaps the image of Lu Yi in my imagination is less than these four words. We don't know exactly what these four words represent, but they do appear in capital letters on some people's faces.
But what is happiness? When reading, they will also laugh at the mediocrity and uncleanness of society, and enshrine the supremacy of scholarship as the standard, but after working, they will not look at the stupid sweetness of the school, and strive to compare each other with who is busier and fancy. Mediocrity and busyness, uncleanness and fancy, in a sense, are all capitalized desires. Some people hide their desires in their hearts, and their faces are full of bitterness with a humanistic atmosphere; some people write desires on their faces, just like the "thank you for watching" at the end of the movie on the big screen, and then add the four words "I am very happy".
Who is much better than anyone?
But there's nothing to bargain about. God strives to arrange a proper life for everyone, which is an extremely hard job in itself, otherwise how can we get "unfortunate people have their own misfortunes"? So we should be thankful for our unique misfortune, after all, God has tailored it for us.
As the classic saying goes: "As for playing 'falling dogs', it is not so simple, depending on how the dog is and how it falls into the water." "We are all just dogs, and sooner or later we will all fall into the water, but thinking about how to be beaten has a rich possibility, and it is inevitable that there are some small expectations."