1
Some people's families are lovely, some people's families are scary.
Some people's family members are neither cute nor scary, just busy and a little cold.
My luck was good and the family were lovely.
But I still often think, "This is horrible!" ”
Good horror? What's so scary?
"Family members can't change it casually!" It's a scary thing.
Every time I go to the restaurant to order food, I like to order something that I have not eaten, and when the food comes up, if it is really difficult to swallow, something as weird as a Japanese natto, I will obediently taste some taste, and treat the money paid as a "viewing fee".
It means spending money to go into the museum to see the mummies of dry corpses from two thousand years ago, and to gain some insight.
Ordering dishes to be unpalatable, at least ordered by yourself, at least there is such a little autonomy of dignity, wayward happiness.
Love meets bad lovers, at least it is their own choice, at least there is such a little independent dignity, wayward happiness.
Only "family", neither through the "ordering" step, and do not want to fall in love can "communicate for a while to see".
Family, like hair nails, is "equipped for you".
Hair nails, you can also dye and cut, enjoy yourself, although not satisfied, but always can be repaired to as much as possible satisfied.
Your family will not allow you to "renovate". Although I was not satisfied, I had to accept it.
No matter how bad the dish is, the nightmare disappears when the table is withdrawn.
Family members come to the table every day, each with their own expressions, and most importantly, they will also speak!
What could be more terrifying than that?!
I grew up feeling unacceptable about this – although the family I was "equipped" with was really decent, why didn't I have to pick another one?
What if there are "more ideal" ones?
Even if you go to the toy store, let me pick one, right?
2
There is a Belgian movie called "Toto's Little Hero" protagonist Toto who has been convinced since he was a child that he and the baby in the next bed were mistakenly held by two panicked parents during the fire in the nursery.
Toto thinks that the neighbor's family is his real family.
The pomp and circumstance of the neighbor helping the child celebrate the birthday is the pomp that should have been enjoyed by himself, the neighbor's house, the car, the beautiful holiday... It all belongs to Him!
But all this was snatched away by a baby who was holding the wrong baby in the middle of the fire.
Toto insisted he had been "robbed."
His happy life has been robbed, and what the robbers have left him is a group of family members he does not want, a life he does not want.
Is Toto crazy?
Toto is not crazy.
Toto only magnified the "why not me" question and regret in each of our hearts a hundred times.
A child of a commoner's family who wants to be born in a powerful family: "Why not me?" ”
The children of the rich family want to be born in an ordinary family: "Why not me?" ”
"Why not me?"
"Why not me?"
The more Toto lived, the angrier he became, and he made a ridiculous decision - he began to take back the life that belonged to him step by step!
The problem is that most of us are different from Toto, we don't have "imaginary enemies."
Even if we want to go to "grab it back", we don't know what to grab?
However, we were a little luckier than Toto.
We may be like Toto, "equipped" with a not-so-good family.
But better than Toto, we can create a life of our own, without having to stare at a "life of someone else" like him.
Like the protagonist of a video game, Toto has been programmed and cannot end the game without completing the task.
Imagine the misery of being locked up in an electric toy, and you'll feel lucky — life is set to no fun.
The greatest joy of life is that before the answer is officially revealed, anything is possible.
3
In the process of growing up, I slowly figured out why I got more power in novels written by foreigners; why did I get more power in watching foreigners' plays?
I found that the protagonists who appear in foreign works often face their own lives.
And the protagonist of the Chinese work is either surrounded by "family" or is covered by the "national nation" and suffocated.
Let's say Dream of the Red Chamber.
"Being the most enduring entanglement by a group of the most wordy family members." ——This is the dream of the Red Chamber in my mind, the super nightmare of the Red Chamber!
If there are people with good intentions who come forward and change "Dream of the Red Chamber" into an attack game, it will immediately highlight the hardships of the male protagonist Jia Baoyu's growth-
Jia Baoyu, constantly being attacked by the women in the family, bravely moving forward, passing through the barrier, all of this pass is Lin Daiyu appearing in the shadows, attacking Jia Baoyu with tears, changing the lower pass to the old ancestor of Jia Mu in the sky, constantly stuffing one meal after another of delicious food into Jia Baoyu's mouth...
The big monster guarding the pass is Jia Zheng's father, who frantically beat Jia Baoyu with a stick...
Alas, after such a day, after one hundred and twenty times, how could Jia Baoyu not go home?
4
Is Jia Baoyu's encounter a "special case"?
Isn't the horror I feel from him representative?
I'm a little disbelieving - please don't ignore that in the whole Chinese culture, Jia Baoyu is the most well-known teenager!
Or to put it this way: Jia Baoyu is the most well-known "decent" teenager.
When the young Romeo betrayed the family for love, the young Jia Baoyu was being annoyed by the three sisters and six wives and was about to suffocate!
I can't help but think that in the era when there were no translated works to see, all the young girls who hated their families and were fanatical in their hearts, when they looked at the fabricated world on the stage, they would always see Jia Baoyu who was so depressed, and they would be very desperate.
Fortunately, we finally had a few not-so-"decent" teenagers, and wild children like Ne Jia of the "List of Sealed Gods" really made my eyes light up and my spirit cheer up a lot.
Ne Jia, willful and capable, killed his father and could not afford to offend the son of the Dragon King, in order to make his parents no longer embarrassed, the young Man Na Da committed suicide to end his life, and returned the destroyed body to his parents.
Of course, this is very handsome, but how tragic the price of this "handsome" is!
The relationship between Chinese teenagers and their families is either as terrifying as Jia Baoyu's, or as terrifying as It is?
5
What do people who write stories do?
People who write stories generally feel that life is full of trivial impurities, life is very monotonous, and the world around them is not very charming, so they have to use their brains and mouths to make up some interesting lives.
For those of us who watch stories, one after another has been fabricated into a life that is worth observing, that may be inspiring, that it is self-soothing, that it is a dazzling window and a mysterious exit of our bleak world.
Teenagers who read stories also expect to see the windows set up for them and the exits opened for them.
Unfortunately, there are not many such examples.
Most of the Chinese stories are about the lives of adults. The politics of adults, the morality of adults, the feelings of adults, marriage, the family of adults.
Sophisticated, troubled, roundabout, and full of holes.
For all the teenagers who stand in front of the window of life and look at it, and occasionally push open the door of life to probe the probe, how can they understand the mystery?
From "Dream of the Red Chamber" all the way to see Zhang Ailing's words, life is very unbearable, desire is very dirty.
Of course, this may be very real, very able to present a certain kind of truth of life, but for many teenagers who have been trapped in their families for many years and waiting to flap their wings to test flights, these "truths" are very disappointing.
If you go to the movie and it's only been ten minutes, and the movie theater mistakenly shows the ending first, how can you not be disappointed?
The artistic value is very high, but for teenagers, it is very disappointing.
6
In Chinese stories, Jin Yong's novels have a youthful mood, can live vigorously, and make people want to spread their wings and fly away from the family and open up a happy life by themselves.
The teenagers fabricated by Jin Yong are definitely not something that Jia Baoyu can mix together.
Who?
The two most famous.
Wei Xiaobao, Yang Guo.
Wei Xiaobao of "Deer DingJi", the ultimate of a rogue teenager.
Yang Guo of "Divine Eagle Hero", the champion of rebellious teenagers.
They didn't have to be locked in the house like Jia Baoyu, because Wei Xiaobao was born in a brothel and Yang Guo was an orphan.
They have suffered a lot of the world, so they do not come to the deceptive trick of "sacrificing the small self and completing the big self".
Of course they have persistence, otherwise they're just jerks.
Wei Xiaobao insisted on righteousness, and everything else was "leniently handled."
Yang Guo insisted on love, and everything else "went to him".
The great shackles of the nation-state, after the two of them "tried on", immediately "returned" very sensibly.
Jin Yong, who wrote the story, never explicitly said that he was fed up with the depression of Chinese teenagers who were forever tied up by their families and nationalities, but when we look at Yang Guo and Wei Xiaobao, it is really difficult to imagine that Jin Yong is not venting for teenagers who have been bored for centuries.
7
In Yang Guo and Wei Xiaobao's body, I saw an important trait -
These two teenagers, never taking family or country as a reason, stopped the pursuit of happiness in life.
They have weaknesses and setbacks, but they also believe in the value of life, do not easily shrink back, do not find excuses to give up.
Compared with Toto of the "Little Hero of Toto", Yang Guo and Wei Xiaobao were ten times more unlucky.
But they don't "snatch back" other people's lives, they take care of it themselves.
Wei Xiaobao got an enjoyable life, and Yang Guo found tranquility and happiness. Whatever it is, at least it's their own choice.
Although the family you were born cannot be picked by you, life is still yours, please be sure to squander it.