Dress to see the quality, diet to see the amount.
People's cultivation depends on these four quantities: volume, stomach, guts, and qi.
1. Volume
As the saying goes: reason is not high.
The volume of your speech exposes your cultivation.
Liang Shiqiu said: "A person who speaks loudly is instinctive; speaking quietly is civilization. ”
When the generals were fighting, Zhang Fei drank and broke the Yang Bridge, which was not as good as Zhuge Liang's talking and laughing; Zhuge Liang was clever and eloquent, and he could not win the hearts of the people than Liu Bei's taciturn words.
Since ancient times, the nobles have spoken slowly and lowly.
Suppressing people with voice and defeating people with wisdom will eventually lose to people with virtue.
When Song Qingling was young, he came to the United States alone to study.
In a history class, an American classmate openly said: "The so-called ancient civilizations, such as China in Asia, have been eliminated by history." ”
Song Qingling felt very angry, but he was not in a hurry to interrupt this statement.
It wasn't until the classmate finished speaking that Song Qingling stood up to refute it.
Her tone was soft as usual, but her tone was particularly firm.
Song Qingling said: "China is like a sleeping lion, but it will not sleep forever, and one day, its roar will shock the world." ”
Soft voices can also be full of power.
Second, the amount of belly
As the saying goes: a general can run a horse on his forehead, and a prime minister can hold a boat in his belly.
People who have the ability often have a large belly and can tolerate people.
A drop of ink falls into a glass of water, and the glass of water immediately changes color;
The same drop of ink falls into a sea, but it cannot change the appearance of the sea in the slightest.
Both the sea and the water cup can hold water, but their stomachs are very different.
As Feng Zikai said: "When the heart is small, all the small things are big; when the heart is big, all the big things are small."
It is not that gentlemen are not angry, but they are more tolerant than ordinary people.
There is a vice-name association at Tanzhu Temple in the western suburbs of Beijing: "The big belly can tolerate things that are difficult to tolerate in the world; when you open your mouth, you laugh, laugh at the ridiculous people in the world." ”
In "Ghost Valley", it is said: "The hypocrisy of the aware man is not the form of the color; the loss of eating the man is not moving the mouth." ”
When encountering intolerable things and difficult people, there is no need to waste time with them.
The face is silent, the heart does not have a storm, is the real high person.
3. Guts
Vision determines the level, and courage determines success or failure.
Confucius said: "Those who know are not confused, those who are benevolent are not worried, and those who are brave are not afraid." ”
Liang Qichao said that the so-called brave must do two things: the first one is to have a bright heart.
As the saying goes: don't do bad things in your life, and don't be alarmed when you knock on the door in the middle of the night.
As long as the heart is bright, nature is not afraid of darkness.
As Mr. Jin Yong said: "He is stronger than him, and the breeze blows the mountains; he crosses him, and the bright moon shines on the river." ”
Second, it is not to be held back by inferior desires.
Just so-called: the sea is a hundred rivers, there is tolerance is great; the wall stands a thousand, and no desire is rigid.
Pulled by material lust, even a hundred steels must be turned into a soft finger.
Most importantly, always maintain a high morale.
You can lose to the difficulties in front of you, but you can't lose to your own spirit.
Six methods of knowing people are summarized in "Lü's Spring and Autumn".
One of them is called "anger to test its knots."
When you are angry, you can best see a person's true disposition.
The higher the quality of people, the more they often know how to control their temper.
The Hu Shi family had two elder brothers, each of whom married each other when they became adults.
His elderly mother took Little Hu Shi and lived with his brother and sister-in-law.
The eldest sister-in-law is the most incompetent and the most ignorant person. The second sister-in-law is a very capable but very narrow person.
Between concubines, they often lose their temper because of disagreements.
It was only because of the presence of the mother-in-law that he did not dare to openly make trouble.
When the sister-in-law is angry, she neither speaks nor answers. Just put the face down and make people ugly.
When the second sister-in-law is angry, the noise is even more frightening.
The mother was caught between them, but always gentle and patient.
Mr. Hu Shi said: "The most disgusting thing in the world is like an angry face; the most vulgar thing in the world is like putting an angry face to others." It's worse than scolding. ”
High-quality people, even if angry, must maintain the most basic courtesy to people.
When encountering unpleasant things, do not get angry or complain.
And will not let negative emotions affect the people around you.