<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > the most ideal state of marriage, is to find someone who loves you the most, but also the person you love the most, give each other a destination for each other's emotions, place each other's lonely souls, and grow old with a white head. </h1>
But not every marriage is a love that leaves aside all impurities, and the heart belongs.
There are some marriages that are reluctantly facilitated by utilitarianism, will-ordination and regret under the circumstances of last resort, thus creating a painful, tired, wordless, loveless and even sexless husband and wife relationship.
I saw a saying before: people will meet four people in their lives, the first is yourself, the second is the person you love the most, the third is the person who loves you the most, and the fourth is the person who marries you, but the person who is married is not the person you love the most, nor the person who loves you the most.
I think that such a marriage, in all of them, must be full of rebellion and unwillingness, Li Li and her husband Hu Xiaoguang in "Textile Girl", this is so, such a combination is doomed to be imperfect.
"Textile Girl" is a film released in 2010, the film directed by Wang Quan'an, Starring Yu Nan, Cheng Zhengwu and other stars, tells the story of Li Li, a textile worker, who was found to be terminally ill and had little time, so she decided to go to Beijing to find zhao Luhan, her first love boyfriend Who had been in love for many years, but broke up because of family obstruction, but the last wish story.
Comparatively speaking, Li Li and Zhao Luhan are platonic love (the pursuit of spiritual communication and rational spiritual purity of love), while the combination of Li Li and Hu Xiaoguang cannot talk about love, but only because of worldly persecution, elderly generals, and Li Li's self-abandonment under anger.
In Li Li's eyes, whether it is personality, interior, appearance or family lineage, Hu Xiaoguang has always been not the lover she wants, so in the ten years after marriage, she has been hiding Zhao Luhan in her heart, and her status and weight are far beyond Hu Xiaoguang.
Such a deformed emotional state is both mentally and physically torturous for both parties. It's just that this kind of tormented pain, smoothed out by chai rice oil and salt, children, and under the pressure of life, even survival, it has never erupted.
But the regret and unwillingness of both parties always exist, and the film shows the most secret, true and unspeakable side of marriage in front of us under the portrayal of this contradictory heart. Watching this drama is like self-analysis, digging out the thoughts hidden in the depths of the heart of "what I love most is not you, but marrying you", and making it public. At the same time, it also vividly shows the emotional dilemma commonly faced by couples in marriage.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > the story of "Textile Girl" is set in Xi'an in the early 1990s, when the first wave of layoffs brought about by huge social changes. </h1>
Hu Xiaoguang once worked in the same textile factory as Li Li, but Hu Xiaoguang had been laid off and now sold fish in the wet market in order to make a living. Li Li was still in the textile factory, and the heavy work made her look a little greasy, and her face lost its luster, replaced by vicissitudes and exhaustion.
Ten years ago, Li Li was a stubborn woman, and at that time, she was full of fantasies about love, and she was also obsessed with her lover Zhao Luhan. Li Li's parents objected to her being with Zhao Luhan, and after Zhao Luhan left Xi'an, her parents quietly withheld her letter to Zhao Luhan, she did not know the reason, and thought that Zhao Luhan had no news. Two years later, Li Li had no choice but to gamble with her parents, choosing to marry Hu Xiaoguang, who had nothing and was several years older than herself, and then cut off contact with her parents.
After Zhao Luhan came to Beijing, he had no news of Li Li, and when he had news of Li Li again, he heard that Li Li was married. Since then, this pair of lovers has been driving according to their respective life trajectories, thinking that they are empathizing with each other and abandoning themselves.
With Li Li's character of daring to love and dare to hate, if she can get Zhao Luhan's response, she will definitely run to Zhao Luhan desperately, and even fall out with her family for this.
Such a plot setting, compared with the real empathy, feelings are more sincere, poignant, and regretful. When you are young, love can always be desperate like a moth to a fire, but there are very few that can really bear positive results, which is why so many people watch this movie and can resonate.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > what broke Li Li's peaceful life, why did she hide from her husband to meet her first love? </h1>
In the textile factory, most people were deducted a little wage, Li Li was indignant with the salary strip, she stood up, looked for leadership theory, and even directly quarreled, fortunately, a colleague pulled her.
Others are also not convinced, but forced by the pressure of leadership, chose to be patient, Li Li stood up as this head bird, enough to see her strong and competitive personality, but more, it is to highlight the meager salary and the dilemma of family economy, if not, he will not quarrel with the leader for ten yuan and eight yuan.
The family situation is average, Li Li still paid for her son to learn extracurricular skills, after work, she sent her son to practice the piano, in the free time waiting, she leaned on the sofa and fell into a deep sleep. When she woke up, she found herself bleeding from her nose again, and during this time she didn't know what was going on, and she was always inexplicably dizzy and nosebleed.
When he went home for dinner, Li Li told Hu Xiaoguang about the nosebleed, hu Xiaoguang did not speak, he just clipped the fish to let Li Li eat more.
Li Li did not get verbal concern and comfort, and she was not angry about Hu Xiaoguang's silent response, because she had become accustomed to it, which was the normal state of their lives, as light as water, without waves.
In a chorus rehearsal in the textile factory, Li Li suddenly fainted on the ground, and after being sent to the hospital for examination, the doctor told Li Li that it was only mild anemia and should pay attention to rest, and then on the grounds of urine test, Li Li was opened.
After Li Li left, the doctor told Hu Xiaoguang that your lover had leukemia, that is, blood cancer.
Hu Xiaoguang was on the spot, his face was expressionless, but from the godless and sluggish eyes, it was enough to see his trance and trepidation. The doctor said: two options, one is bone marrow transplantation, the other is conventional chemotherapy, the cost is very high, and it may not be cured, if not treated, it will only take 3 to 6 months.
The doctor suggested that Hu Xiaoguang should not let Li Li know about the condition, for fear of affecting the patient's mood. Unexpectedly, this conversation was listened to by Li Li, who was standing at the door.
Without crying or collapsing, Li Li and Hu Xiaoguang calmly returned home, she pretended not to know, he thought she really didn't know, just under the calm appearance, each thinking.
Hu Xiaoguang was worried about Li Li's body and the high cost of treatment, while Li Li was immersed in the fear of death and disease, and it was difficult to extricate herself for a while.
Feeling that time was running out, after a period of reflection, Li Li decided to go to Beijing to find her first love Zhao Luhan.
<h1 class = "pgc-h-arrow-right" > meet people who have loved each other, and in the case that the two parties do not know, in order to make up for regrets, will they break through the shackles of ethics and morality? </h1>
Li Li told Hu Xiaoguang that she wanted to go to Beijing to relax, and at this time, Hu Xiaoguang of course agreed, but what he didn't know was that, in fact, Li Li was looking for Zhao Luhan.
Li Li wanted to relive the feelings of love in a limited time, and she also wanted to ask, why didn't Zhao Luhan reply to his letter in the first place?
Li Li remembered that Zhao Luhan worked in the "Friendship Printing and Dyeing Factory", and after some inquiry, he found the printing and dyeing factory.
At this time, in a small corner wrapped in dyed cloth, a man sat on the ground, leaning on the pillar to fall asleep, only to see that the man's sideburns had become slightly white, and his face was full of haggard and vicissitudes, which was Li Li's beloved Zhao Luhan.
Awakened by the sound of footsteps, Zhao Luhan woke up, and when he saw Li Li in front of him, his face was incredulous.
Ten years of staggering, things are not people, each other is not the original appearance, the two look at each other for a long time, the heart of a mixture of feelings.
At night, the two were eating hot pot together, and Zhao Luhan said: I am also married, not long after you got married. After speaking, Zhao Luhan took a large glass of beer in his hand, accompanied by years of bitterness and helplessness, and drank it all.
Li Li finally asked Zhao Luhan: I wrote you so many letters back then, why didn't you reply?
Zhao Luhan was very calm and said: I have never received a letter, I asked someone to inquire about your news, and what I got was that you were married.
The misunderstanding was solved, there was no laughter, there was no relief, and the full of grievances and regrets had been precipitated with time and had become an unchangeable past, even if there were thousands of knots in the heart, it was helpless.
The next day, they met to go to Beidaihe, where they wanted to go when they were in love, and they just made a picture like friends, without holding hands or making any intimate movements, because they were married, and there was already a moral and ethical gap between them.
Returning from Beidaihe, Li Li did not say goodbye, she did not tell Zhao Luhan about her illness, but Zhao Luhan's heart was still grumpy about the past.
Although Li Li and Zhao Luhan's love affair is full of regrets and misunderstandings, they all choose to accept and respect the reality that has become a reality, no matter what the situation, the bottom line cannot be broken, and they must be responsible for themselves and their other half, but also for each other's families.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > object of mutual affection, he may not be good, but can someone replace it? </h1>
Soon after Li Li returned to Xi'an, she no longer had to go to work because the textile factory had closed.
On this day, it was snowing like goose feathers, and Li Li stood on her balcony, looking into the distance, smoking a cigarette one by one, letting large pieces of snow fall on her.
After Hu Xiaoguang finished washing his clothes, he came over to her and said: Go back to the house and rest, smoking is not good for your health. Li Li didn't want to pretend anymore, she said: I'm dying, unlike others.
Hu Xiaoguang did not know how to comfort Li Li, he bowed his head, self-deception said: Now that medicine is very developed, you can rest well, don't think about it.
After Li Li entered the house, Hu Xiaoguang stood on the balcony, he looked sad, the middle-aged man's downfall was written on his face, he looked into the distance, and sighed a long sigh.
At this time, as a man, Hu Xiaoguang's spirit almost collapsed, he was the top pillar and the main backbone of the family, but when Li Li was ill, he could not even take out the cost of treatment.
Soon, Li Li fainted again, and after being sent to the hospital, the doctor issued an ultimatum, her illness, after taking the drug did not get better, it was recommended to give up treatment.
Hu Xiaoguang was still expressionless, he returned home, dealt with the house quickly, and decided to operate on Li Li.
In the hospital room, Hu Xiaoguang took out an envelope from his pocket, not knowing who sent the letter, and when Li Li opened it, he found that it was a photo of himself and Zhao Luhan in Beidaihe, and at this time, Hu Xiaoguang had gone out.
Zhao Luhan in Beijing was also looking at the photos, and he took out the accordion that had been sealed for a long time and played it, just as he had played it to Li Li.
Zhao Luhan's playing accordion and Hu Xiaoguang's laundry and cooking form a sharp contrast, the former represents the romance of love, and the latter represents the simplicity of life.
In the process of going to the operating room, Li Li was extremely afraid in her heart, but at this time, she was accompanied by Hu Xiaoguang, who was silently dedicated to him, and she couldn't help but grasp Hu Xiaoguang's hand, which was her only sustenance and sense of security.
When Li Li came out of the operating room, Hu Xiaoguang had been waiting for her at the door, and at night, Hu Xiaoguang was sleepy and fell into a deep sleep next to her, Li Li got up, she looked at the brilliant fireworks outside the window, and then looked back at Hu Xiaoguang who was calling, thoughtful.
All thoughts erupted in a silent posture, and Li Li had an epiphany, and Hu Xiaoguang's love for her was thick and wordless.
This is the first time li li attaches importance to and re-examines his feelings with Hu Xiaoguang, for Li Li, he really has no love for Hu Xiaoguang, but when he is lying on the hospital bed, the most helpless and painful, it is the taciturn Hu Xiaoguang who gives everything to accompany and take care of himself.
Hu Xiaoguang's broad bosom like the sea can accommodate any stones that Li Li has left behind, and this man is always saying, I went to wash my clothes, I went to cook... Such a man is not suitable for love, but in life, it is not necessary to pick.
This relationship, for Hu Xiaoguang, is humble, in exchange for ordinary people, most men may not be able to tolerate, Hu Xiaoguang's personality, the same is the vast majority of women can not tolerate.
But marriage is like this, there is no perfection, there is no absolute satisfaction, some are just mutual understanding and tolerance,
It is said that it is better to forget each other in the rivers and lakes, in fact, in the face of the great disaster, the inseparability of mutual foam is even more precious. For former lovers, since they missed and untied their hearts, it is better to really forget about each other.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > written at the end:</h1>
When I first watched this film, I felt that Li Li was pitiful, and after thinking about it carefully, I felt that the really pitiful person was Hu Xiaoguang. For Li Li's pity, it is more because she is terminally ill. For Hu Xiaoguang's pity, it is his emotional lack. The wife who sleeps with him and spends time with him day and night does not love him, and you can imagine how humble he has lived in these years of marriage.
Li Li has a strong personality and Hu Xiaoguang is weak and humble, and such a combination is not equal. In a real marriage, the stronger party, like Li Li, occupies the initiative and the commanding heights, while the weaker party often needs to bear more grievances and bitterness.
The movie is an analysis, loveless marriage, how to live? How to deal with a loveless partner?
Li Li did not love Hu Xiaoguang, she herself was miserable, she lost her passion and hope for life, and she began to have the mentality of getting by and getting by. But she understood that she was already married, Hu Xiaoguang was her husband, and she must be loyal to this marriage, which is to respect herself and the bottom line of being a person.
What is valuable is that even if the life is difficult, Li Li has never thought of divorcing Hu Xiaoguang, which is based on the responsibility of the family and children.
When Li Li came to the end of her life, she suddenly realized that the past of those winds, flowers, snow and moons would eventually dissipate with the wind, blow into the wind, and fall into the forest. Hu Xiaoguang's thoughtful care and companionship in suffering and hardship are truly true.
In reality, most marital feelings do not have so much lingering pity, nor are they romantic enough, but the companionship that does not abandon is the longest confession of love. And the person who accompanies us is the one we are most worthy of love.
END
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