That Sunday afternoon, I'll never forget. The sun was shining, and my small courtyard was bustling with activity. Relatives rarely get together, and laughter and conversation come and go. With a plate of freshly grilled lamb skewers, I walked to the large round table in the middle of the courtyard with a smile on my face.
"Lao Xu, come and sit!" My third uncle greeted me warmly.
As soon as I sat down, my cousin came over and said with a smile, "Brother, I heard that you are retired?" How much is the pension? ”
I was stunned for a moment, but still told the truth: "6500." ”
As soon as the words fell, the whole courtyard suddenly fell silent. All eyes were on me, as if I had just said something earth-shattering. I felt uncomfortable for a while, and lowered my head to concentrate on the food, trying to alleviate the sudden embarrassment.
However, the silence did not last long. Soon, the conversation turned to my "affluent" life.
"Oh, Lao Xu, your pension is really a lot!" The second sister patted her thigh and sighed.
"Yes, yes, no wonder Brother Xu can still go out fishing often after retirement." My cousin took over the conversation, and there was a glint in his eyes that I couldn't read.
I hurriedly explained: "If you fish a lot, you just ...... occasionally."
But before I could finish my sentence, I was interrupted. Relatives, you and I began to talk about how superior my life was. I felt an inexplicable sense of unease, as if I had become a rare animal to be watched.
The following week, my house was full of people. Relatives from all walks of life took turns to come to the door, each with different "problems".
"Brother Xu, my son is going to study abroad, can you lend me 50,000 yuan?" The cousin pinched his cigarette and said with an embarrassed expression.
"Cousin, I want to start a small business, can you lend me 30,000 yuan for a turnaround?" Cousin Xiaoyu blinked his eyes with a look of anticipation.
When faced with relatives who were really in need, I tried my best to lend a hand. But for those who are obviously here to take advantage, I can only politely decline.
"I'm sorry, I don't really have that much money." I told my cousin Xu Lei that he wanted to borrow 100,000 yuan to speculate in stocks.
However, my refusal seemed to have lit a fuse. The family group suddenly exploded, and all kinds of accusations came overwhelmingly.
"Xu Yong, you really don't know how to be grateful! If it weren't for our help, you would be where you are today? The third uncle's words are heart-wrenching.
"That's it, when you have money, you forget your roots, I really don't know how you became a teacher all these years!" The second aunt also chimed in.
Looking at the accusations that kept popping up on my phone, I felt like the world was spinning. Those once friendly faces have now become hateful. I clenched my fists, and the anger and disappointment in my heart flooded in.
I took a deep breath and silently put my phone down. The sun was still shining outside the window, but my heart was shrouded in a haze. It dawned on me that a simple number could completely change human relationships. The world seems to be much more complicated than I thought.
Sitting in a rocking chair in front of the window, I quietly flipped through the old photo albums, my thoughts drifting back to the yellowed photos.
In 1955, I was born into an ordinary working-class family. At that time, the country was undergoing earth-shaking changes, and I grew up in such a big era.
"Mr. Xu, why are you looking at old photos again?" Uncle Li next door asked.
I smiled and replied, "Yes, I'm retired, and I can't help but think about the past." ”
When I think about my 40 years as a teacher, I feel a warm current in my heart. I still remember the day I first stepped on the podium, I secretly vowed to become an excellent people's teacher. Since then, I have devoted all my passion to education.
"Teacher Xu, on the day you retired, all the teachers and students in the school were very reluctant." Uncle Li said with emotion.
I nodded, the corners of my eyes moistened a little: "Yes, I'm also reluctant." But when I saw that the students were all promising, I felt that this life was worth it. ”
The pension of 6,500 yuan seems like a lot, but it embodies my decades of hard work. When I was younger, I used to work overtime to prepare for classes, correct homework, and make up classes on weekends.
His wife often joked, "You're busier than the principal!" ”
I gave up a lot of my personal time and development opportunities for the sake of my students. Even so, we have been frugal in our lives.
"Mr. Xu, you have a lot of pension!" Uncle Li said enviously.
I smiled wryly and shook my head: "It seems like a lot, but you have to be careful to use it." ”
Thinking back to my past with my relatives, I couldn't help but fall into deep thought. When I was younger, I always tried my best to help relatives in need. I remember when my cousin was in college, I borrowed two years' salary to pay for his tuition. My cousin Xiaofang got married, and I gave me a color TV, which was very expensive at the time.
At that time, relatives were very grateful and often said, "If it weren't for Xu Yong, we really don't know what to do." ”
However, as time goes on, this gratitude seems to be slowly fading. I began to feel some subtle changes, as if my help had become a matter of course.
"Lao Xu, why do you say that the current interpersonal relationship is so complicated?" Uncle Li sighed.
I was silent for a moment and replied, "Maybe it's because our values are changing." ”
Indeed, the traditional notion of "helping each other" seems to be becoming increasingly difficult to maintain in modern society. I began to wonder if I should find a balance between being willing to help and protecting myself.
"Actually, I sometimes wonder if I've done things the right way over the years." I muttered to myself.
Uncle Li patted me on the shoulder: "Mr. Xu, you have been a teacher all your life, and you are a role model for yourself in life and in doing things. It's just that the current society has changed, and people's hearts have also changed. ”
I nodded, mixed feelings. Once upon a time, I thought that if I tried my best to help others, I would gain genuine friendship and affection. But reality slapped me in the face. I can't help but reflect: In this era of rapid change, is it time for me to adjust my way of doing things?
As the sun sets, the afterglow falls on my desk. I stroked the souvenirs given by the students, and a mixed emotion welled up in my heart. Perhaps, it is this love of education and concern for students that has shaped me into who I am today. No matter how the outside world changes, I will always cherish this original intention.
I sat in my study, my fingers hovering over my phone's screen, hesitating. The news in the family group is still beating, and each one is like a sharp knife, piercing my heart. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and thought back to the days ahead.
"Lao Xu, why don't you say anything?"
"Xu Yong, are you so worthy of our relatives?"
"It's so chilling to forget your roots when you have money!"
The words echoed in my head, and I felt a suffocation. I knew it was time to make a decision.
With a flick of a finger, the option to "Leave Group Chat" is confirmed. In an instant, the hustle and bustle came to an abrupt end. I leaned back in my chair and breathed a sigh of relief, but my heart was mixed.
The call came in quickly. "Xu Yong, what do you mean by this?" The third uncle's voice was full of anger.
I calmly replied, "I'm sorry, I need some quiet time." ”
In the days that followed, phone calls and text messages poured in. I could only reply selectively, and the feeling of exhaustion in my heart was getting stronger and stronger.
One morning, I was standing in front of my house, looking at the familiar street scene, and suddenly an idea came to me: perhaps, it was time to get out of here.
When I decided to move, I had mixed feelings. When packing, every item carries a myriad of memories. My fingers stroked the textbooks on the shelves, testimonies of my years of teaching.
"Mr. Xu, I heard that you are moving?" Aunt Wang, a neighbor, asked in surprise.
I nodded and smiled wryly, "yes, I want to change the environment." ”
One last time I looked around the house, my eyes moistened. Here are my laughter, my tears, my youth, my years. But I knew that for the sake of peace of mind, I had to take this step.
On my first day in a new city, I stood on an unfamiliar street, feeling both nervous and expectant. Rented a small apartment and started a new life.
Slowly, I made new friends. Aunt Li in the community often invited me to her house for tea, and we chatted and talked very closely.
"Mr. Xu, your experience is truly admirable." Aunt Li said sincerely.
I smiled and replied, "Everyone has their own path to follow." ”
I regained my younger hobby of drawing and learned to shoot short videos with my smartphone. Life becomes full and interesting. Without the distractions, I felt the peace I hadn't felt in a long time.
At night, I often sit on the balcony, watching the city lights and thinking about life. I began to re-examine the relationship between money and family. Money is important, but it shouldn't be a measure of affection.
I have also redefined "family" and "friends". True relatives and friends should be people who support you when you are in trouble and sincerely bless you when you are happy.
"Teacher Xu, you look radiant now!" Aunt Li exclaimed.
I laughed and said, "Because I've learned to love myself and I've learned to keep a proper distance from people." ”
Yes, I've finally learned to set healthy interpersonal boundaries. I understand that kindness does not mean that there is no bottom line, and helping others does not mean wronging oneself.
I have new expectations and plans for my future life. I want to continue to learn new things and stay curious. I want to volunteer more and give back to the society in my own way. I want to cherish the people who really understand me and love me, and spend quality time with them.
Late at night, I stood in front of the window and looked at the starry sky. I had peace of mind, and I knew that this was the life I had been looking for. What was once a turmoil, but now it seems that it has become an opportunity for me to grow. I smile and look forward to tomorrow's sun.