"What's your favorite style of home?" On social platforms, this issue has recently sparked heated discussions.
Some say "speak well"; Some say it's "goodness at heart"; Some people say that it is "discuss big things, forgive small things, do not argue about right and wrong, and do not turn over old accounts"; Some people also say that it is "not to blame parents, not to blame partners, not to blame children"......
At present, there are more than 400 million families on the mainland, and each family and even each person has its own answer. The answers vary greatly depending on age and region, but they all have something in common.
One side of the water and soil to support the other side. A good family style cares for a person's growth, waters the flower of family happiness, and also affects the social atmosphere. In Qingdao, people who are deeply influenced by Confucian culture and maritime culture have distinctive and long-standing family stories. For example, cultivating and reading heirlooms, benevolence and filial piety, pioneering and enterprising, and being anxious about people's difficulties. Together, these family traditions nourish the land and shape the spirit of the city.
The scene of the Qingdao family story sharing meeting
May 15 is the International Day of Families. The Qingdao Family Story Sharing Conference and the launching ceremony of the first Laoshan District Family Culture Festival were held recently, telling the most beautiful family stories and promoting good family customs.
So, what should a good family style look like? How can I create a good family atmosphere?
One
What is Family Style? In ancient times, it referred to the code of conduct and ethics that was passed down from generation to generation in a family; At present, it is more manifested in the spiritual inheritance within the family, the words and deeds of the parents, etc.
From ancient times to the present, Chinese have always paid attention to family style and family discipline. The earliest family motto can be traced back to the Book of Commandments and Birds of Zhou Gong. Confucius's "no way to stand without learning etiquette" and Zhuge Liang's "quiet self-cultivation, thrift to cultivate virtue" and other family mottos are well-known. The land of Qilu is the state of etiquette, and in the Qingdao area, thousands of families and families have written their own family style stories from generation to generation.
Jiaozhou Guojiazhuang Kuangyuan Sculpture Wall Photo by Wang Lei
Cultivate and read heirlooms, inherit a line of books. At the end of the Eastern Han Dynasty, Zheng Xuan, a scholar of scripture, cultivated under Buqi Mountain, and then gave lectures. By the time of the Ming and Qing dynasties, Qingdao was dotted with cultural families, most of which were heirlooms. Zhang Mengli of Laixi studied hard, Jinshi and first, official to Dali Temple, and ate from the first product. His son Zhang Sicheng made the gold list again. His six-character family motto of "prudence, diligence, wisdom, benevolence and bravery" has been passed down by word of mouth for more than 500 years. His family is known in Jiaodong as "one door and eight jinshi". Wang Yi of Li Cang, Kuang Yuan and Ke Shaoxian of Jiaozhou were all among the emperors of the Qing Dynasty, and the school was run by later generations.
Self-cultivation and integrity, stick to the original intention. Jimo has five major families: "Zhou, Huang, Blue, Yang, and Guo". The Lan family has been inherited for more than 800 years, and hundreds of people are officials, and none of them are corrupt. Yang Yan in the Yang family is upright and upright, and is known as "the first clean and honest in Jiangbei". Guo Xiu in the Guo family is the "iron-faced imperial history" during the Kangxi period, he went up to the impeachment of Mingzhu, Gao Shiqi and other powerful ministers, and his iron bones shook the world.
A father and daughter are visiting a video exhibition with the theme of "Qian's Family Motto".
Love the country and protect the family, and show your blood. Huang Zongchang in the Huang family led the villagers and retreated twice. Zhou Haoran, a member of the Zhou family, fired the first shot of Qingdao's armed resistance against Japan, and was only 24 years old when he died. Many revolutionary aspirants went into battle with their families, such as the martyr Wang Yimin, with a total of more than 20 people in the family, including 13 people who joined the Eighth Route Army. He rested in Taiping Kok, watching the smoke of gunfire dissipate and the city grow.
Benevolence and filial piety, take care of the peace of the family. In modern society, a good family style is still the most beautiful scenery. Wang invented "cutting the liver to save his wife", witnessing the most beautiful love; Liu Caixiu has been taking care of her elderly mother-in-law and her husband in a car accident for many years; Three generations of Yuan's family are committed to public welfare...... They guard the warmth of the home and inherit the power of the spirit.
Two
If you have a home, you will have a family style. For a family, the family style is not a question of "whether it is good or not", but the difference between "good or not". A good family culture is essential for individuals, families and society.
Feifei, the representative of the most beautiful family in Shandong Province, told the story of family style
A "heart lamp" that will never be extinguished. The strength of the ship is in the sails, and the strength of the man is in the heart. Family is the destination of the soul, and a good family style gives people the power to move forward and be good. Yang Jiang said: "Everyone comes to this world with home as the starting point. Everyone walks in the world and has their own unique style, which is due to family style and family education. When you are in a family with a "respectful" family style, you will have more confidence to make choices when facing every crossroads in life.
The "driving force" of a family to move forward. Family style is the foundation of a family. "If my children and grandchildren are like me, what will I do with the money? Children and grandchildren are not as good as me, what do you do with the money? Lin Zexu taught his children like this. The hit drama "The Glory of the Fathers" resonated strongly with the audience, because people saw the preciousness of family style. As long as there is a good family style, no matter how poor the family is, it is only a temporary hardship. A loving family, because of the mutual support of family members, will never be defeated by difficulties.
The "cornerstone" of a city's culture. Family style is the spiritual core of a family, and it is also the epitome of social values. In Qingdao, the good family style has nourished the water and soil and shaped the city.
In a bookstore in Qingdao, a mother is accompanying her child to buy books Photo by Wang Lei
For example, from the city to the countryside, couplets such as "Loyalty to the family for a long time, poetry and books for a long time" can be seen everywhere. Countless families attach great importance to education and love reading, making Qingdao a "city of books". In 2023, "Scholarly Qingdao" will rank among the top 5 municipal-level brands among the national reading brands in 41 regions across the country.
For another example, almost every family will tell their children, "When others are in trouble, it is a good help to help." Charity acts such as jumping into the sea to save people and giving generously have become the norm, making Qingdao a "city of good people". Recently, citizen Wang Long's charity act of rescuing a pair of drowning mothers and children in Zibo attracted the attention of the whole network and touched countless people.
Another example, when people make every effort to break through the "stuck neck", benefit the people, cast a "great power", and chase dreams of deep blue, the family is a strong backing. The common feelings of family and country and sense of responsibility make the family deeply understand and fully support.
Three
The times are developing, and the family style is not "finished".
Writer Ma Boyong said: "The inheritance of a family is like a fine antique. It has been cared for and polished by many people, and has been quietly accumulated over a long period of time. "At present, how can we make the family style better and better?
Pay attention to inheritance and pass on love with love. The inheritance of family style is a "compulsory course", but there is no "textbook". It's not a parent's ear-to-ear message, it's not a wielded stick, it's not a preaching after something wrong. It is a detail of life, a parent's words and deeds, it is like air, it has a lasting penetrating power. A happy family makes people have light in their eyes, love in their hearts, and achieve each other. People who live in warmth can walk the road wider and wider, and are willing to pass on kindness to others.
Hit people's hearts and let the warm current become the top stream. Role models are "visible philosophies" that have the power to move people's hearts. To play the exemplary role of a good family style, we must have both "eyes that are good at discovering beauty" and "good at spreading the power of beauty". At present, we must learn to cut to the "empathy point" and dig deep into the "traffic pool". Less indoctrination, more empathy, through the "small incision" of real people and real stories, to construct opinions, convey emotions, so that the public has a "sense of substitution" from people to themselves. In 2016, his family was named the first "National Civilized Family", and he founded the "Cultural Hutong" to preach family style and family education, which led tens of thousands of people. The story of Qingdao's good family style is also in more diverse forms, through the online platform, and continues to "go out of the circle".
The old man of Laixi Changdesong preaches family style and family education in the "Cultural Hutong" (data map)
Revitalize the classics and develop in the integration of the old and the new. The construction of family style needs to innovate in inheritance and develop in innovation. Traditions cannot be rejected in their entirety, but should be inherited selectively. In recent years, the resurgence of popularity such as "Qian's Family Motto" and "Sansu Family Style" is an example. Those good family morals should not always be "lying" in the museum, but "coming alive". Find the point of convergence between tradition and modernity, make it a tool for family education, and take root in the hearts of the majority of young people. Nowadays, Qingdao Qinglian Family Style Museum, Red Family Style Museum, etc., have attracted more and more young figures.
The family style is pure, and the rain moistens all things; The country is beautiful, and the country is mighty. A good family style can help children buckle the "first button" of life, and can also set up the coordinates of life for them; We can make better individuals, and we can also gather into a better country. This "wind" that has blown for thousands of years sends us "a long wind and waves, and there will be a time when the clouds and sails will be in the sea".
(Editor: L, this article is published and produced by West Coast, from Qingdao propaganda, please indicate the source for reprinting)