It's really nice to respect how your body feels. When people reach middle age, the most important thing is to be honest with themselves.
There is a reader Jasmine who has known her for a long time, and in the follow-up of her marriage story, she sent a current exclamation.
Because of her ex-husband's cheating, she divorced. Now, she has a boyfriend who is 6 years younger and doesn't think about the future and only enjoys the present.
She also has a best friend, who is also divorced and single, and has also found a lover, but this lover has a family.
But her best friend didn't care.
Some people say:
When people reach middle age, they seem to think about life all of a sudden, no longer pursue things with empty heads, no longer wronged themselves, and boldly pursue what they want, as for whether there is tomorrow or whether there is a future, they are too lazy to be entangled and anxious.
Jasmine's story seems to be very representative.
One
The first marriage broke down because Jasmine was too selfless.
Or to put it bluntly, it's because of the disharmony between husband and wife. The man cheated because of this, and there was no extramarital compensation in marriage.
Jasmine has been a good girl since she was a child, she is well protected by her parents, and her education is also very traditional and conservative. In her own words, being a good wife and mother, and being a good man's virtuous helper is the life philosophy that her parents have always instilled in her.
Therefore, after falling in love and marrying her ex-husband, what she wants is that she will be a couple for the rest of her life, considerate and tolerant.
In order to play the role of a good wife and mother, Jasmine always wronged herself, accommodating men, and pleasing men.
Especially when it comes to things between husband and wife.
I obviously don't enjoy it, but I have to deliberately pretend to be very comfortable.
Refusal to explore and communicate openly, feeling ashamed, feeling unspeakable needs.
After having a child, his body was deformed, his appearance deteriorated, and when he faced the little thing between husband and wife, he was even less confident and more ashamed.
Jasmine Says:
For a long time, I kept attacking myself and denying myself, always feeling that my legs were thick and my skin was dark, and my body was not perfect, so I always dodged when it came to husband and wife.
Even if the man cheated later, I was just arrogant and secretly blamed myself, just because the woman was in good shape.
I always blame myself for saying that it is because I am not in good shape and I can't let go of my hands and feet that I make men lack interest.
In fact, there are 10,000 reasons for a cheating man, and it has nothing to do with whether you are good or not.
The more you reflect, the more likely you are to fall into self-aggression and the less confident you become.
When you are not confident, in this relationship, you will completely lose the initiative and the right to speak.
Two
At the time of the divorce, Jasmine said that she would never fall in love again, and she would no longer have the luxury of feelings.
But two years later, she has a boyfriend who is six years younger.
The other party is unmarried and single, and Jasmine is divorced with a baby, such a relationship is obviously difficult to have results.
But Jasmine doesn't care:
Enjoy the process on it, what you want the result.
Men are very infatuated with her, both in life and physically, and have an infinite attachment to her. Jasmine knows that this is the charm that her age and life experience bring to her. Once a woman is alive and well, the lethality to young men is huge.
The failure of her previous marriage made her understand that a relationship may not necessarily have any results, the result is unwanted, and the happiness of the moment is the most real.
At present, the infatuation of her little boyfriend made her feel the self-confidence she had not seen for a long time, and she had unprecedented happiness both mentally and physically.
When people reach middle age, it is too nerve-wracking to talk about feelings, and it is also a simple and beautiful thing to only enjoy the physical happiness and spiritual satisfaction of the moment.
Love or not to love, it's too illusory, almost 40 years old, everything depends on your own happiness.
Some people say:
The real charm of a mature woman lies in truly accepting herself, in truly facing her own needs, and in facing her own needs.
When you know how to respect your heart, live your life casually, and focus on the current state, life becomes simple and easy.
There are a thousand ways of life for a thousand people. For some, morality is a constraint and a shackle, while for others it is something that can be discarded at any time.
Live according to your heart, if you can afford the cost, if you can afford the cost, just pay the price.