Preface
Habits are extremely common in our daily life, some habits are formed subtly and become a part of life, and some habits are formed after careful consideration for a specific purpose. Behind the habits, there are often rich emotional sustenance and personal experiences, which are a continuation and expression of the past time. In the process of getting along with others, we often feel troubled or puzzled by a certain habit of the other person, and feel that the other person's behavior conflicts with our own cognition and values.
In fact, everyone's habits have their own story behind them, and being able to listen to and understand each other's stories, and respect and tolerate each other's habits is one of the important factors in building a good interpersonal relationship. Through careful observation and listening, it may be possible to find that the habit that confuses or even disgusts you may be the true portrayal of a special experience or emotion in the other person's heart, and it is he who uses the code of his heart to tell his story to the world.
1. The story behind the habit
# 1. Everyone is unique
Everyone is a unique individual, with their own thoughts, emotions and life experiences, and these colorful elements are also quietly influencing and shaping a person's inner world and behavior. In daily interactions, you may have doubts and troubles due to certain behaviors and habits of others, find it difficult to understand each other's thoughts and practices, and even have negative emotions.
However, when we learn to empathize and look at others with an attitude of tolerance and understanding, we may be able to find that the habit that confuses or even disgusts us is actually a portrayal of the emotional sustenance and special experiences unconsciously revealed by the other party, and it is he who uses his behavior and details to tell others his inner world.
# 2. Habits are the continuation and expression of the inner world
Habit can be said to be a mirror of the inner world, a continuation and expression of past times and emotional experiences in the present life. Behind every habit is a wealth of emotions and emotions, which is a response to a specific need and sustenance in the inner world, as well as an interpretation of various feelings and experiences in the external environment.
For example, some people like to read books quietly alone, they feel that reading is a good medicine for spiritual growth, and they can get infinite wisdom and emotional nourishment in books; Some people like to get together with friends and sing, they feel that music can be a bond between hearts, and they can find joy and stress release in singing.
Whether it's reading alone or sharing music with others, these seemingly ordinary details and habits of life are silently presenting an important part of their lives to others, and they are also communicating and connecting with others in a spiritual way.
# 3. Tell the story of your heart with the code of your heart
Everyone's inner world is so rich and complex, with their own unique emotions and thoughts. In real life, communication between people is often so difficult, because language is always limited in expression, and it is impossible to completely and directly convey what you think to others.
Habit may be called a kind of code that uses the heart to tell the unspeakable story in the depths of the heart. When we learn to perceive the other person's habit with a listening and observing heart, we may be able to unlock this spiritual code, enter the inner world of others, and establish a deeper and more sincere emotional connection with others.
2. John's story
# 1. John's peculiar habits
John is a very attentive and caring person, and his life is full of all kinds of warm details. And perhaps because of family reasons, John has formed a very special habit in his study and life, that is, whenever he does his homework, he will especially like to turn on the light.
This habit gives the originally quiet night a touch of warm light, and also adds a special atmosphere to his room. And in the depths of his heart, this bright light carries his thoughts and gratitude to his family, and it is also a kind of memory and understanding of his difficult years.
# 2. The meaning of light
Perhaps, in the eyes of many people, John's habit is not special, and even feels that it is a waste of electricity. However, when he quietly told Xiao Lin that this bright light meant hope and warmth to him, and it was the beautiful life he had always dreamed of and pursued in his heart, Xiao Lin's heart was suddenly deeply touched.
It turned out that John's childhood was not so happy, their family lived in very poverty, whenever the night came, the light became his only companion, but also a beautiful vision of his future life. Now he is living a happy life, he has not forgotten the hardships and dedication, but cherishes everything in front of him even more.
# 3. Perception and action
After learning John's story, Xiao Lin understood and tolerated him more deeply, she began to respect John's special habit, and also felt the deep emotions behind the habit from him. Perhaps, everyone in life has a story similar to John's, who uses various ways to express their inner feelings and emotions, and also unconsciously influences and infects others.
And when we learn to listen to and understand the stories of others with a tolerant and grateful heart, we may get a lot of inspiration from them, and we will also become richer and more complete on our own growth path.
3. Get along with others
# 1. Respect and inclusion
Behind everyone's growth, there will be a variety of reasons and stories, and these experiences and insights will also be reflected in their behavior. And when we find that the other person has completely different habits and practices from our own in the process of getting along with others, it is very important to respect and tolerate.
As a popular saying goes: "What you see is only other people's habits, and the story behind it, why do you say that he is wrong?" Learning to listen to and understand each other's stories with a tolerant heart may make the original doubts and resistance slowly disappear, and the relationship with others will become more harmonious.
# 2. Listen and share
In the fast-paced life, communication between people is often only superficial, and there are few opportunities to deeply understand each other's inner world. In fact, listening and sharing can be a bridge to bring each other closer together, allowing emotions and understanding to flow freely between hearts.
When we are curious and doubtful, we might as well try to communicate sincerely with others, listen to their stories, maybe we can get unexpected touches and inspiration from them, and we will also have a deeper understanding and knowledge of others.
# 3. Gratitude and understanding
Everyone who has crossed paths with them, whether they are family members, friends, or strangers, will leave a unique mark on their lives and become an important part of their growth story. And when we learn to get along and communicate with others with a grateful heart, we may be able to understand better that the meaning of life is to become richer and better in the company and understanding of each other.
epilogue
Everyone's life is a thick and wonderful book, and every page in the book is worth savoring and cherishing. When we learn to listen to and understand the stories of others, we will also find more and more sparkling and moving words in this book, and together with others, we can write our own wonderful chapters.
Let us, with a grateful heart, to meet others, with a tolerant attitude, to listen to the stories of others, perhaps, you will be able to harvest unexpected warmth and touching in life.