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How hard it is for women to write
Text/Yan Lingyang
01
Chat with a female author about the criticism that female bloggers are suffering online.
We were surprised to find that female bloggers may suffer several times as much criticism, criticism, and abuse as male bloggers.
Few people have been staring at a male blogger for a few years, but many female bloggers have such black fans.
Some women know how to feel sorry for a strange man who is far away in the world.
For example, no one has ever seen or known my ex-husband, but every once in a while, someone comes to me and asks: Wouldn't he be angry if you actually wrote him into a book?
Wow, since the old lady dares to write, who am I afraid of being angry? Moreover, to record a marriage and the growth gained after a divorce is to "scold your ex-husband"? Have you read even a single page of this book? How did you come up with such an evaluation?
The problem is, the ex-husband is not angry. Even if I'm angry, I'm going to bear the consequences....... What's the matter?
Are you so afraid that he will be angry, but you have to care about what subject I write, so you are not afraid that I will be angry?
Once, I asked my ex-husband to do a little favor, such as helping me pull the furniture downstairs in my company, and another woman felt sorry for him and asked me: Why don't you ask the moving company to help you with such a small matter?
Hey, can you handle it? With the car you paid for?
I once wrote about my ex-husband's experience of going on a business trip on the day I gave birth, and a woman came to me and said that I was not virtuous, saying that men are right to fight for their careers.
I:??? Lying on the delivery bed, I am in pain, how can I be virtuous? Do you bring him water for washing his feet?
Only...... I really don't understand these kinds of people.
You said that they didn't know their ex-husbands, they defended their ex-husbands so much behind their backs, and their ex-husbands didn't know either, and they wouldn't give them half of the benefits, but if they came to my territory to criticize and educate me, I would definitely be angry, and they would definitely be scolded and blocked by me......
Why do they have to take the risk of being scolded and blacklisted by a big living person like me, and they also have to spend time and energy to maintain a man who can't give them half of the benefits and is far away?
One by one, when they see a man, they compete for his "cloud wife" and "cloud concubine" or what?
As long as you see a mother, hostility, malice, and superiority are so strong?
What's more, some people are particularly prone to "tube too wide".
I wrote about my ex-husband, and they said: Your ex-husband will scold you.
I wrote to my parents, and they said, "Your parents will scold you."
I wrote to my colleagues, and they said, "Your colleagues will scold you."
I wrote to the tenants, and they said, "The tenants will scold you."
I wrote to the agent, and they said, the agent will scold you.
I wrote to passers-by, and they said that passers-by had seen and scolded you.
The whole history, all the news reports, countless novels that can find prototypes in real life, and the themes written by self-media authors are all about others.
Everyone dares to write because they are afraid of scolding, okay?
In fact, no one scolds except you.
What more people care about and worry about is whether I can get inspiration from the things shared by the author.
Very few people worry about others to this extent.
02
I have worked in the financial unit of the system for many years, and now I also write articles on topics such as economics and finance, official document writing, etc.
From time to time, some readers have commented on me, "Judging from your style, it really doesn't look like a woman wrote it, which is rare."
At first I was a little happy when I heard this.
Suddenly, one day, I felt that there was something wrong with this kind of judgment standard of the other party. "Like a woman writes" is "rare"? What do you mean? "Like a woman wrote" is inferior?
The reason for this is that our society has become accustomed to male authors occupying the discourse power in the field of writing, and everyone is accustomed to the discourse system dominated by them, and a series of evaluation criteria have been derived.
For example, writing like a man is qualified and excellent; If you write from a purely female perspective, it will be "feminine in women" and have no pattern.
The problem is that women can see and interpret the world differently than men; We can also write in our own way, completely different from theirs, and we don't have to imitate their writing techniques, follow their conventions and perspectives.
Earlier, Wang Meng also criticized Zhang Jie for abusing her right to speak in "No Word". Wang Meng's criticism of Zhang Jie is very inexplicable in my opinion, and the hat is also very buttoned:
"If some of the other characters in the book were also capable of writing, what would it be? Authors are actually a privileged group with a certain power of discourse, and the right to speak is treated like all power, should we be cautious and responsible for the use of this power?
How can the power of discourse be turned into a democratic, equal, and self-disciplined exercise of power, rather than a one-sided grievance?
Should a writer write everything or write nothing? Doing something is a manifestation of a person's discipline and principles. If everything is written, is there any consideration of privacy and dignity, Wende and Wenge? ”
However, Zhang Jie wrote a novel, but there is a prototype in the novel, and this prototype Wang Meng knows and has passed away.
Zhang Jie's literary talent is, in my opinion, far superior to Wang Meng's.
Wang Meng said that Zhang Jie was writing about his hatred, but why didn't Wang Meng have the selfish intention of "blaming the dead"? He pulled out big hats such as Discipline, Wende, and Wenge, just to cover up his little selfishness of "wanting to be ashamed of his colleagues".
Wang Meng has long adapted to the patriarchal discourse (writing) system, and their generation of writers generally has no intuitive feeling about the situation of women.
Almost all of these female figures are the objects of men's obscenity, and their images are also full of "subordination".
They are unlikely to be the protagonists, but are merely objects to be observed, copied, and depicted by male writers.
Whether it is Chen Zhongzhong, Lu Yao, Yu Hua, Liu Heng, Zhang Xianliang, Wang Xiaobo, Jia Pingwa, Mo Yan or other male writers, there are generally only two types of women in their writings: one is the Virgin, who dedicates everything to the person she loves; One is sluts, self-exiled and depraved.
I don't need to give an example, but if I talk about these two points, I think you will have a few female figures in your mind.
And what kind of book is Zhang Jie's "No Words"? It is a purely female perspective, and the protagonist in the novel is also a woman.
For thousands of years, male writers have lived in a patriarchal discourse (writing) system. In their works, women are either praised or sympathized, but basically they are only used as "props" to help the male protagonist explore the emotional world or realize the male protagonist's life ideals.
When they depicted these female characters, did they think about what could and could not be written?
Zhang Jie just wrote a few selfish men from a female perspective, which made them feel extremely unaccustomed, and they wanted to suppress female writers from the perspective of discipline, morality, and literary style.
But in fact, do they write fewer female prototypes?
I think Wang Meng's criticism of Zhang Jie is just not used to having women who will also use their own voice to pull down the disguise of some men.
They have held the right to speak and judge for too long, and they are only accustomed to standing in the position of "judges" and demanding that others not only say "one-sided words", but they have never considered it: in the patriarchal discourse system, men have continued the style of "only saying one-sided words" for thousands of years.
You don't so much say they're just as they are afraid.
When the right to explain a relationship is also in the hands of women, they can no longer pretend to be "great" as they want.
It's a very invisible form of workplace discrimination, but it's very common.
If you don't believe me, please ask yourself: have you ever encountered a similar situation in your career?
You're a female editor at a publishing house, and you're looking for a female author to write a book that women might love, but your boss is a man, and you're killed as soon as you put forward your topic because they don't think women like to read it.
You are a female manager involved in the planning of parks or the architectural design of shopping malls, and you have made a suggestion to your boss: generally speaking, there are serious queues outside women's toilets in parks and shopping malls, and there should be at least one-third more toilet pits for women than men.
However, your boss is a man, he has no experience of these things at all, he just thinks it is too troublesome, so he waves at you and says: Your advice is not important.
You are a publicity planner for a real estate company, and you are involved in a real estate promotion project. When choosing a slogan, you voted for a slogan that would appeal to single female homebuyers, but because your boss and colleagues were almost all men, you could only stare at the slogan that objectified women based on the principle of "the minority obeys the majority".
In these things, your proposals are not wrong at all, and even your proposals are likely to bring greater profits or better social influence to the employer, but you have no chance to practice them, because the right to speak and make decisions is in the hands of others.
In our society, there is always a lot more discipline for women than for men. In the workplace, it's easy to be asked to "step aside"; In the family, you are expected to be gentle and virtuous, to understand the general situation, and to take care of the overall situation, but basically, you are not gentle for yourself, virtuous for yourself, and you are not aware of your own general situation, nor are you concerned about your overall situation.
Women are always encouraged to sacrifice, to give, to "burn themselves, to illuminate others", to live as someone else's lace.
However, we should be independent, autonomous, and free to bloom.
The opposite of women is never men, women and wise and courageous men should stand in the same position to face the outdated gender bias and the injustice caused by the inertia of the system and system.
So, I'd like to recommend a copy of "One Step Forward" by Cheryl Sandberg, the author of the first female member to enter the Facebook board, one of the top 50 "most powerful" business women on the Forbes list, who appeared on the cover of Time magazine in 2013 and was named the most influential person in the world by Time magazine.
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Author: Yan Lingyang, born in the 80s, emotional columnist, author of new feminism, member of the Chinese Writers Association. He is the author of the best-selling books "Those That Make You Miserable, One Day You Will Say It with a Smile", "May You Let Go of the Past and Be Worthy of the Future", "May You Have a Journey and a Way Out", "I'm Divorced", "With Your Rivers and Lakes Are Not Lonely - An Alternative Interpretation of Jin Yong's Martial Arts Novels" and the children's picture book "Mom's House, Dad's House". With 13 years of experience in financial industry (management), he is currently the founder of a cultural information consulting company in Guangzhou and the co-founder of a cultural media company. Born in Lijiang, Yunnan Province, he now lives in Guangzhou.
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