It was said
A child who is deeply loved
More powerful
What kind of love is that for children
It's the real "love".
Let's take a look
8 Moments for Parents to Love Their Kids!
01
Children do not blame easily for doing wrong things
A netizen shared an experience when he was a child playing football and smashing the neighbor's precious vase, but he didn't expect that after his father apologized to the neighbor, he actually said to himself:
"Daddy knows you didn't mean it. ”
"Next time we can find an open place to play, what do you think?"
Then, his father took him to find a suitable place to play football and played with him for an afternoon.
He said: I am most grateful to my parents for never reprimanding me when I made mistakes.
When a child makes a mistake, the guilt and fear in his heart are no less than the anger of his parents.
What they need is the understanding and guidance of their parents, so that they can try and make mistakes, correct them, and face them calmly.
An understanding look, a comforting word, and a warm hug can blow away the tension and guilt in the child's heart.
02
The child is timid and will not blame him for being "cowardly"
There is such a kind of child: when there are many people, they always like to hide behind their parents, and when they are in a group, they are always submissive.
At this time, many parents will say: really timid, too cowardly!
Such a response is a neglect of the child's emotions. The more timid the child, the more fearful he will be of his surroundings, and once he is labeled as "timid and cowardly", he will become weaker and weaker.
When your child is afraid to play with a child, you can guide them like this:
1) You were a little scared just now, didn't you?—— accept your emotions
2) It's okay, my mother used to be scared too, it's good to be familiar with it - empathy, build a sense of security
3) Let's go and play with them together – help him deal with his fears
Seeing the child's anxiety and accompanying him to try the things that the child is afraid of, this is a sign of love.
03
When your child doesn't say hello, treat them with respect
In the perception of some parents, not saying hello = not being polite.
But in a child's world, reluctance to say hello = I'm not familiar with you yet. When children are confronted with unfamiliar people, they will instinctively develop fear and resistance in their hearts.
Once parents force their children to say hello, they ignore their children's fears.
I watched a child's conversation with his mother, and it was very heartwarming.
Mother: "You see the other children are saying hello, why don't you?"
Child: "Because...... I'm not ready. ”
The mother chooses to respect the child: "It's okay, when you're ready one day, we'll say hello." ”
Instead of forcing your child in exchange for his resistance, you should choose to respect him and let him take his time.
04
Don't force your child to share when he doesn't want to
Many children have experienced being "forced to share":
"Give the toy to my sister, you have to let him. ”
"You give it to him, don't be so stingy, and I'll buy it for you when I come back. ”
……
Adults are always worried that children will become selfish because they don't like to share, and in fact, forcing children to share is harmful.
Because passive sharing is a kind of sacrifice. Not only will it give the child a sense of frustration, but it can also easily cause the child to feel deprived.
Every child has ownership of things, and not sharing does not mean that he is selfish, but that he has a self-expression.
We need to learn to respect our children's egos and allow them the right to say "no".
Children who are not forced to share will have the courage to refuse in the future.
05
When your child has a tantrum, accept him
In the face of children who love to lose their temper, it is really a headache:
cry when you feel uncomfortable;
If you don't agree with each other, you will drop things......
At this time, parents must not beat and scold their children, otherwise the children will form an irritable personality because of depression.
It has been said that behind every kind of anger, there are hidden expectations and needs, and to express anger is to fully express those expectations and needs.
We need to allow our children to express the expectations and needs behind their anger in order to solve the problem.
06
Comfort your child when he doesn't meet his expectations
Some parents always arrange their children according to their own expectations and make him become what they like, but in the end, they are disgusted and rebellious by their children.
We can expect from our children, but understand that they don't have to cater to all the expectations of their families.
When your child does not meet the expectations of adults, you should also affirm and comfort him. Create a relaxed family relationship, and everyone may have more happiness.
07
When your child succeeds, praise him sincerely
A mother shared a touching story about her 10-year-old daughter making her own breakfast one morning, and the mother was so happy that she kept complimenting and encouraging her.
At first, my daughter didn't do well, but every time the mother encouraged her daughter, and then my daughter got better and better.
The "audience" that children need most is the person who can applaud them, especially the appreciation and love of those closest to them, which is the motivation for children to continue to move upward.
Parents should learn to cheer for their children: when their children do something, no matter whether the result is good or bad, applaud him first, so that he has the confidence to do better.
When a child fails, he can still encourage and affirm him, so that he is not afraid of difficulties.
08
When your child makes a fool of himself in public, maintain his self-esteem
Parents are willing to put down their children to protect their children in public, so they can truly love him.
The best way to love a child is never to compare, nor to ridicule in public, but to "support" the child when he feels bad.
Parents are always willing to stand with their children and fight against external harm, in exchange for the child's lifelong head.
Source: China Education Daily