Author: Phantom Brother
People always have to settle down and live a quiet and self-awakening life.
You can have a bad experience, but you can't indulge yourself in a bad life, fate is only responsible for shuffling the cards, and it is always us who plays the cards.
What are the signs of a person's maturity?
A high praise replied: less bluffing, more impassing.
When Lin Zexu was a teenager, he and his classmates climbed the mountain together, and after reaching the top, the teacher came up with a couplet on the topic of the sea for them to match.
He chanted impassionedly: "The sea is at the end of the sky, and the mountain is the peak." ”
When he was forty years old, he picked up the pen again and added two sentences in front of it: "The tiger is deep in the mountains and listens to the wind howling, and the dragon lies in the shallows and waits for the tide." ”
Last night in the micro space Futian store, and a few excellent souls discussed a very meaningful topic of life, everyone sat on the ground, waited carefully, laughed and laughed to think about the true meaning of life, and gave a beautiful promise to the future......
After entering the venue, in the self-introduction session, there are majors in philosophy, psychology and life coaches......
After the introduction, Ms. Sugar handed out a list with "Soul Thoughts" to each of them, saying, "Please take 5 minutes to think about the first question and write it down." ”
Q: Please pick up a pen and write down 8-10 keywords that are important to you and valuable in your life.......
When I saw this question, my first reaction was definitely a good question, and if I think about it, I haven't thought about it for a while, and I have to think about it......
After thinking for a while, I put pen to paper: mindfulness, altruism, spontaneous combustion, freedom, simplicity, tranquility, nature, inheritance...... After falling on the paper, I began to think again,
Why do my first thoughts come to the first three words?
How did I define these three words when I used them as my values in life?
Today I feel that these three words are so familiar and so unfamiliar, why is it in this state?
And it's written, it's written, freedom and inheritance are also written, why?
With questions, enter the next link, a group of two, ask and answer each other, and my group of classmates, she wrote: growth, altruism, love, compound interest, tolerance, long-term, kindness, self-worth......
I asked her, "How do you give up one of them, and which one do you choose?"
The other party replied: "The rest is all gone, I only keep the growth ........"
I asked, "Why did you choose that?"
The other person said, "In my heart, growth is the foundation of all this......"
"Come, look at your ......," the other said.
Talk about your definition of each keyword.
I said, "Then go through ...... one by one."
Mindfulness: that is, conscience;
Altruism: because of your existence, solve his problems;
Spontaneous combustion: self-combustion, refers to the state;
Freedom: no longer seeking outside recognition;
Simple: Cut out the complicated and simplify life;
Tranquility: the state that people reach in their hearts after abandoning all hypocrisy, conceit, exaggeration and flashiness;
Nature: The Tao is naturally natural, and all things are naturally natural.
Legacy: Leave something to remember for future generations.
"Please sort your keywords. The other party said
"In that order. I replied
"Please discard one of them, and talk about how the discarded card relates to the other words. The other party said
I said, "Let go of the tranquility ...... first."
"What else?" asked me
"Abandon simplicity and inheritance, and then give up nature......" I replied.
"What else?" said the other man
"And ...... reluctant," I said
"You want so much. The other party said
"But these are important to me......" I replied
"Is it possible that your freedom is based on mindfulness and that you do things that conform to the laws of nature?"
I said, "Repeat what you just said......
After the other party repeated, I said, "I choose free ......."
The moment I left my freedom, I kept thinking, why did I choose freedom in the end?
The first reaction was related to the recent reading of the Zhuangzi and the recent contact with the recent thoughts of Buddhism...... On the way back, I was still wondering, why did I leave my freedom today and give up everything else, is this really the truest desire in my heart?
I think so!
Why is it so important to me?
I think it may have something to do with these two sentences that I wrote in my circle of friends four years ago: the word fame and fortune are too small, but they can also hold a lot of people and things in this world, and the word fame and fortune are not big, but they can also give a lot to sentient beings.
What kind of life do you want to be?
Sometimes I think about it, life is a process of constantly decreasing desires and desires, and the deep meaning of fate is to learn to give up and return, to give up all the impetuous hustle and bustle, and return to inner peace. ”
The true happiness of a person does not lie in the outside world, but in his own heart.
If you have scenery in your heart, you will not be afraid of desolation, and only when you have light in your eyes can you see hope.
In the past ten years, I have been going around all the way, looking all the way, and in retrospect, the most is to choose to move forward bravely in a fearless state, and sometimes, I often ask myself: "If the time comes to 2014 again, do I still have the determination to meet the past ten years?"
Every time I think of this question, I feel an inexplicable relief. It may be true that a newborn calf is not afraid of tigers, and it may be that the sword qi is 30,000 miles long; A sword cold light nineteen states.
What can't be returned is not only time, but also the people around you who are drifting away and the former self.
With the state of being on the road, more than ten years have passed. Sometimes I sit down and think about it, the state ten years ago and the state today, the most valuable things for me at each stage are different, maybe ten years from now, I want something different.
Confucius is a recognized scholar of the university, and his ideas have profoundly influenced the world from ancient times to the present, so I am curious to see how he grew up.
I searched and searched, and found this familiar sentence in the "Analects of Politics": I am five out of ten and am determined to learn, thirty and stand, forty and not confused, fifty and know the destiny of heaven, sixty and obedient, seventy and do what I want without exceeding the rules.
A few crosses condense the growth of a lifetime, but the interpretation of this passage is different. After reading many versions, I think the best explanation is a passage by Wang Baoqing of Yunmeng County, Hubei Province.
He said that he didn't know what it meant when he read this passage before, but when he was in his fifties, he suddenly had an epiphany when he connected the life course he had traveled. After reading it, I strongly agreed with it, so I excerpted it below.
"I am five out of ten and am determined to learn", which means that I do not know until I am fifteen years old that I am determined to learn. Children are generally about seven years old, but the purpose of learning is not clear, they are ignorant, and they do not know how to concentrate on learning. Since childhood, I knew that there were very few children who studied hard, and although Confucius later became a saint, he did not know how to study hard until he was fifteen years old.
"Standing at thirty" means that you don't know how to do something until you are thirty years old. That is, what I do in this life, just as young people today determine what profession to do.
Ordinary people were established at the age of twenty, but Confucius was late and loved to play, so he went to be a drummer, and it was not until he was thirty years old that he woke up to do the right thing.
Standing at 30 does not mean that you have to start a family or stand on your own feet at the age of 30.
"Forty without confusion" means that when you are forty years old, you will not hesitate or doubt. At the age of thirty, it is established that you want to do the right thing, what do you do?
I want to do this today, I want to do that tomorrow, I can't make up my mind, I have doubts. When he was forty years old, he was determined to do the great things of "rising and destroying the country, following the peerless, and lifting the people" and "recovering the rites".
This "not confused" means that there is no doubt about one's ideals, aspirations, and the career that one has identified, and that one is not half-hearted, not that there is no doubt about anything or any reason.
At the age of forty, he firmly established his goal, worked diligently until he was fifty years old, became a great priest in the country of Lu, and vigorously advocated "self-denial and revenge," but he did not succeed in it.
Therefore, knowing the destiny of heaven is not the ability to know the will of heaven at the age of fifty.
"Sixty and ears are smooth", which means that when you are sixty years old, everything sounds smooth, and it doesn't matter if you don't get angry.
Because the great ambition was not realized, the complaining, sarcastic, insulting, laughing, and so on, all came, and some people even scolded Confucius as a "lost dog", which made people upset, and their internal organs were full of resentment.
It wasn't until I was sixty years old that I didn't feel like I didn't care when I heard those words, as if I hadn't listened to them.
"Seventy and do what you want" means that you are truly free at this age. Before his great ambition was realized, Confucius went to study the "Zhou Yi" and revised the "Spring and Autumn" until he was seventy years old.
At this time, Confucius's psychological cultivation reached the highest level, and he could speak and do whatever he wanted, and he would not violate morality or Zhou etiquette.
I like this passage because it doesn't have the image of a saint who mythopposes Jonny, but rather tells the story of an ordinary person's growth.
Most people think that Confucius was self-reliant at the age of 30, had no doubts about the world at the age of 40, and knew the will of heaven at the age of 50 – this is an idealized imagination of the image of a sage.
Confucius himself is very modest and objective, he bluntly said the failure and helplessness of his life, and almost said that this is the truth of life.
Although his intellectual and educational achievements have attracted worldwide attention and he has been hailed as a teacher for all ages, he has been emphasizing two things when looking back on his life:
The first is that it is not easy to know what you want and achieve it, and the second is that when a person is truly mature, he will be able to tolerate everything and be at ease in this complex world.
This is probably the unpretentious advice left to us by a mature thinker after the vicissitudes of life.
Times have changed, things have changed, and to this day, these two pieces of advice can still be used as a sign of a person's maturity, because the laws of mental growth in each generation have hardly changed.
Maybe you think you're different and believe that you can achieve fame at a young age, after all, there are many such inspirational stories in the new era of unlimited opportunities.
But if you look closely and appreciate the reality, you will find that such a story is only a very unlikely event.
Most people who pursue "overnight fame" and "overnight riches" often end up with frustration and pain instead of a brilliant peak. You can see how wise the counsel of the sages was.
Yesterday, at the final summary, I received from our classmates at the scene, some of them left love in the end, some left behind self-realization, and some left behind inheritance in the end...... Tracing back to the source, they have left a beautiful place, and they have done their best to contribute to the development of society and the inheritance of civilization.
Haruki Murakami wrote in "Sydney": "In life, the most important thing is not to win, but to struggle.
The indispensable thing in life is not to win, but to fight without regrets."
Many people's so-called maturity is nothing more than being rubbed off by customs, becoming sophisticated and practical. It is not maturity, but the premature aging of the spirit and the premature death of the individual.
True maturity should be the formation of a unique personality, the discovery of a true self, the spiritual result and a good harvest.
It's too crowded halfway up the mountain, so you have to go to the top of the mountain.
I don't want to know what you have, just what you're looking for, you're what you're looking for.
Some people are always looking for it, and whatever they get is not what they want. Some people never look for it, but whatever they get their hands on, they want.
On the path of spiritual seeking, everything that is found, as long as it is natural and true, is good.
In the dead of night, reading the works of the sages, I clearly feel the endless pursuit of the human spirit, and the eternal spiritual value in the world exists, and my heart is very full.
Not aspiring to fame and fortune, not being vulgar, such a person can be strong in spirit, but he is also high and low, and he is destined to be lonely.
If you really want to fight all the way, I think it's for tomorrow's memories!
Phantom Brother was recorded at Ming Fu College on April 26, 2024