"Dear relatives and friends: the good day has been set, the auspicious day is to be visited, I have a thin wine, to thank the good friends, prepare a wedding banquet, and wait for the honorable driver. We invite you to witness our happiness. "May Day is approaching, and the annual marriage peak is also on the way. Have you received a wedding invitation, and how much money do you have to pay for it?
As a long-standing traditional custom, money is not only a material exchange, but also an important link for emotional communication and social relations. However, with the development of society, the connotation of share money, including the public's mentality towards share money, is also changing.
According to a survey released by an organization, 93.2% of the young people surveyed have a burden on their entourage, and 51.2% of the young people surveyed believe that they have both financial and personal burdens. I can't help but ask, what is the reason for the change of flavor of the money? How should the money be followed? What is the follow?
One
As a traditional ceremonial gift, the form and content of money continue to evolve with the changes of society and the development of culture. In ancient times, people mostly followed in the form of physical objects, which were often practical and symbolic. For example, food symbolizes abundance and stability in life, cloth represents warmth and care, and so on.
In modern society, money has gradually evolved into cash. At the wedding, relatives and friends give the couple a certain amount of gift money, and generally prefer to choose auspicious numbers such as 6 and 8 to express their wishes for a better life and happiness for the future.
But I don't know when it started, the money of the people has risen, and it has even become a burden and trouble for many people. After a year or two of working as a young office worker, the friends around them will generally enter the peak period of talking about marriage. However, because his career is still in its infancy, his savings are already meager, and he often has hundreds or even four-figure money, and he will fall into the dilemma of not making ends meet.
Especially for some social experts who love to make friends and have good popularity, the money also has a "Matthew effect": the more friends you make, the more wedding cards you will receive. It's no wonder that netizens compared wedding invitations to "red bombs".
Not only is the amount of money rising, but there are also more kinds of attention paid to the followers. For example, consider the "principle of reciprocity", if you have received money from someone else, then the amount of the gift should be equal to or greater than the amount received at that time. Once the money is not properly used, it is not only easy to lose harmony, but also can cause estrangement or even rupture in the relationship. In recent years, news reports such as "breaking up with girlfriends because of hundreds of dollars of marriage money" have been exposed from time to time.
This trend has distorted the original intention of the followers to a certain extent, and also made some people feel the double burden from the economy and ideology when facing gift money.
Two
On a social platform, some netizens complained that "I'm really tired, with a salary of 5,000 yuan and nearly 3,000 on vacation", which resonated with other netizens; ”
Previously, there was also a "National Wedding Red Envelope Map" widely circulated on the Internet. Among them, Guangdong, as a major economic province, has shown that it does not completely "match" with the economic status in the ceremony, and in some places it only takes 100 yuan to get married, which is very "down-to-earth". This move is quite in line with many people's thoughts, and netizens often joke, "Please bring down the price of the Guangdong people's money."
Behind the joke, it reveals the reality that the culture of money has disturbed many people in contemporary society. As a result, more and more people came forward and said that they wanted to "straighten out the money". There are two implications behind this.
On the one hand, modern people are re-examining their personal values and social relationships. Especially for the younger generation, there is a significant difference between their growth environment and the older generation, which is different from the traditional "sticky" communication based on blood and geography, many people are more independent, prefer to find like-minded friends, and base their social relationships on each other's common interests and values, such as constructing a "light social" model without burden, such as "partnering social".
The author thinks about the flow of money he has given in recent years, most of them are classmates and relatives who don't interact with each other on a daily basis, and they also know in their hearts that there will be very little contact in the future, but since the other party has opened his mouth, he is embarrassed to refuse directly. Sometimes, some friendships that are regained by using money as a bond, even if the love is sincere, are inevitably a little less pure.
On the other hand, people have shown a willingness to express their opinions. Modern people have become relatively sensitive to the constraints of traditional concepts, and are no longer just passive recipients of traditional customs. In recent years, from the rectification of the workplace, the rectification of weddings, to the rectification of money, people are no longer satisfied with private complaints and dissatisfaction, but choose to openly discuss and question those traditional ideas and practices that they believe are unreasonable. From a certain point of view, this kind of rectification behavior is conducive to the renewal and iteration of public concepts to a certain extent, and also helps society to develop in a more open and inclusive direction.
Ningbo Haishu District Marriage Registration Center provides newlyweds with a "gift money mutual exemption card", which reads "After you put this card, don't put gift money" Source: "Ningbo Evening News" WeChat public account
Three
It is undeniable that the original and casual elements are a medium for family and friendship, not some bad habits. The purpose of the contemporary people's rectification of the money of the elements is not to eliminate it, but to rectify the reality of the objectification of interpersonal relations by excessive money. How to return the followers to their original intentions requires the joint efforts of the whole society.
Return to the most authentic emotions. At the end of the day, emotion is the fundamental attribute behind money. Borrowing some creative inspiration to explore more simple and eco-friendly ways to celebrate as a way to express friendship, such as trying a minimalist wedding and using the "gift money free card" as a proof of gift exchange, can not only reduce the financial pressure on the couple and guests, but also make people more focused on the meaning and emotional exchange of the wedding itself.
When you need to give gifts, you may wish to consider your own situation, make reasonable judgments and choices based on your own financial ability and relationship with the other party, and don't blindly follow the crowd, let alone give gifts that exceed the capacity of your wallet for the sake of so-called face.
The new wind of civilization blows into the heart. Continue to explore and improve some effective policies and mechanisms, advocate simple wedding ceremonies and frugal wedding banquets, and oppose large-scale operations and comparison of gift money, which may allow the trend of "high prices to follow" to eliminate the chaff. For example, Wenzhou has explored the establishment of a new capping system for happy events, and used cultural auditoriums and other venues to hold various festive and banquet activities such as collective weddings, children's enlightenment ceremonies, and coming-of-age ceremonies, so as to reduce the cost of ceremonies, which is welcomed by everyone.
The news media has a great influence on shaping and guiding social customs, and through the news media and related platforms, we call on all sectors of society to pay attention to the issue of money, brainstorm ideas and provide diversified ideas for establishing new trends. For example, the public welfare short film "Marriage", with the theme of resisting high-priced bride prices, publicized civilized new wedding customs through character stories, and was praised by the people;
With the part, with a heart and human touch. And to bring the followers back to the benign track and let the true feelings in them return, not only in words, but also in practice. Only in this way can this tradition maintain its beautiful background in the long history and nourish it from generation to generation.
(Source: Zhejiang Propaganda)