A professor claimed that women suffer in marriage, and after giving birth, women's value is low, and the workplace is hit hard. Giving a bride price is not to objectify women, but to provide material protection for women!
He also said that it is easy for men to take advantage of women in weddings, and women do all the housework and take care of men.
The bride price can be a little bit, but it must be brought back to their small home. Today's marriages are all fast food, fast knot and quick departure, very few can last 3 years, bride price and house are risks Your imaginary marriage is a lifetime can only be delusional, and what the future marriage looks like can only depend on the evolution of the market.
In fact, some women can not get married if they feel at a loss, and no one forces her to marry with a gun. Don't be too extreme, in fact, parents urging marriage is also for the good of their children, who doesn't want their children to have a happy family?
If you really can't find a suitable partner, you can't do anything. Today's children are too self-centered and don't put themselves in the shoes of others.
Yesterday, I chatted with my colleague, and her point of view is that women don't need to get married, and if they want to have children, they can borrow sperm to have children. Think about the fact that the fathers don't have any bride price, and there are a few divorcees, but now there are a lot of bride prices, but the divorce rate remains high.
A friend of mine who grew up in a state-owned enterprise in a fourth-tier city in Shanxi Province had never heard of the bride price before 2000, and the first time I heard about the bride price was a girl with two older brothers in the remote area of Xinxiang, Henan Province, which was found by the eldest son of the aunt's family.
Another friend told me: I got married in 03, and I didn't ask for a bride price at that time, and my daughter-in-law and two brothers didn't give a bride price when they got married.
My sister got married in 08, and she didn't ask for a bride price and married 60,000 or 70,000 yuan. My uncle's family is in rural Henan, 3 daughters did not ask for a bride price when they got married, 2 sons did not give a bride price, and the latest marriage in 2015 gave 30,000 bride price, and then the bride price is a strong rise.
In 2020, it will rise to 200,000, and last year my uncle's grandson got married, and he talked about 280,000 bride price, but now there are fewer and fewer marriages in the countryside, and ordinary people can no longer afford to get married.
Marriage is not a question of who suffers! Marriage is a family composed of men and women! Men must take responsibility, and women must be virtuous and wise to keep their families! Good men meet scumbags, and good women meet scumbags, who do you say suffers?
Since you are married, if you can barely get by, don't divorce easily. You're divorced, you've put yourself in trouble, and you're responsible for more than half of the blame. Otherwise, will the man be responsible for your fate after the divorce?
So, in order to solve such a dilemma, you have to keep your eyes open before marriage and half-open and half-closed after marriage, which is the best way to deal with it, unless you just think that your marriage is a loss, and you must be mentally prepared to do so when you get married.
The average man in a family earns 70 per cent and the woman 30 per cent, but when it comes to spending, it is the other way around. In other words, a woman has to spend 40% of the family's money earned by a man, which is called a loss?
The average income of women is more than 70% of that of men (according to national statistics), and women's consumption is about 240% of that of men (220-260% of the annual reports of major business groups), which is personal consumption, not household expenditure. So, who suffers?
And what is the reason for the loss? The main reason is that they feel that the child is born to a man. They feel that love, marriage, family, and children are what only men need.
There is no woman who gets married and doesn't want children, if a man has no reproductive function, how many women are willing to marry him?
If you don't have children, people won't ask you to marry at all, and marriage can only be concluded by mutual consent, so why should you agree to marry if you don't want to have children? The money to marry you back is enough to support a girl in her 20s for the rest of her life.
The other way around, if a man has no fertility or sexual ability, and a woman is unwilling to marry, does it mean that a woman wants a man's sexual prowess. Marriage was originally about giving to each other, making a business transaction, but also about love.
If a woman gives birth to a child and the child does not provide for the woman in old age, then the child is really born to a man.
While asking the child to provide for the woman to support herself, and on the other hand, saying that it is for the man, do you think it makes sense?
If paying the bride price is to buy out the relationship between you and your mother's family, then I am willing to pay this money, in reality, most of the man's family has been working for their children all their lives to subsidize the family, can the mother's family do this to this extent?
Since many women want to make marriage a transaction, the bride price must be paid after giving birth, and cash on delivery is the best fairness for both parties.
Can't you just be allowed to ask for a bride price first, not allow me to have a child first? Since ancient times, husband and wife have been birds of the same forest, and they fly separately when disaster comes, how many families can carry out their feelings throughout their lives?
Men who have no houses and no savings will women be willing to marry and help the poor because of their feelings? Parents will be the first to refuse, for fear that you will not have a good life.
Now the divorce rate is high, and most women propose, because the cost of their marriage is too low, the bride price of the house and car is from the man, resulting in the woman not cherishing the marriage, and leaving if she wants to, anyway, it is easy to find a marriage, even if the second marriage still requires the man to have money and an RV, and the bride price is high, and this business is not accompanied.
Now the social status of women is much higher than that of men, the princess is seriously ill, and when she marries a man, her in-laws are careful everywhere, for fear of upsetting her daughter-in-law, and it is not easy for a man to get married, and most of the bride price in the marriage room must be supported by the man's parents.
Women want to divorce after marriage, anyway, they don't have any cost to marry, and after the divorce, the children sentence the woman more, but the man has to take off a layer of skin after divorce, after all, half of the house is in the woman, and it is not easy for a man to remarry, but divorced women are still fragrant.
The bride price and the dowry itself are meant by the help and blessings of both parents for the newly formed family. And not who owes whom, who gives whom compensation. Haven't women always advocated for equality? Why do they feel that they are at a disadvantage and put themselves in the position of the weak?
My friend told me: First of all, I am a post-80s mother, and the bride price and dowry are the same, and the amount is also the average level in our local area.
Secondly, postpartum depression has been prevalent in recent years, on the one hand, due to physical reasons. On the one hand, I feel that it is not worth it and suffers a loss. In order to give birth to him, she changed from a graceful girl to a sloppy mother who did not apply powder.
The shape of the body, the workplace encounters a wall, the society and family are taken into account, and they are busy all day long, unkempt, and very aggrieved.
If the bride price is to make up for all this, then the man can no longer be asked or blamed for not doing housework and not watching the children, because he has already paid compensation.
If marriage is regarded as a transaction, the payer has paid, and the payee has to fulfill the obligation, the so-called childbirth, housework, this is the obligation of the payee, there is nothing to complain about.
The child is also spent by the man, and according to the business model, the ownership should belong to the man. If you live according to this idea, you will be wronged and unwilling to be doubled over time.
Secondly, my point of view has always been the bride price, the dowry is a kind of help from both parents to the small family, rather than who compensates whom, if you have the ability, you can give more, and if you are incapable, you can give less.
Living at home has to be equal, no one takes advantage of it, and no one suffers. When there is something to discuss with each other, the bride price is used as a family fund for family construction, which is the meaning of marriage. Why don't you want to get married, how good a person is, you can do whatever you want.