01
I used to think that marrying a man who was willing to "support me" was the greatest happiness of a woman. When we got married, he promised me that he didn't need me to go out to work, as long as I was at home and took care of this cozy nest, he would be satisfied.
At that time, I was immersed in the sweetness of love, thinking that this was the comedy of my life, but who knew that such a married life was a hidden tragedy.
For eight years, I was like a trapped canary at home, taking care of my in-laws and two children day in and day out.
I carefully prepare every meal every day, take care of every corner of the house, and I think that's all I value. However, I have overlooked an important fact: women, in addition to being the guardians of the family, should also be the protagonists of their own lives.
Until one day, I found out his secret outside. The woman, young and beautiful, had a twinkle in his eyes that I hadn't seen in a long time when I was with him.
Angry and sad, I asked him why he had betrayed me. But he said to me contemptuously, "Without me, can you live a good life with your shirt and your mouth for food? ”
02
At that moment, I woke up like a dream. It turned out that I had always been in his eyes, just a parasite dependent on him for my life. My dedication to this family, my efforts, are worthless in his eyes. My fantasy of happiness was nothing more than a dream I had weaved.
I finally understood that his so-called "raising me" was nothing more than a kind of control and restraint. He didn't really love me, he just wanted to trap me in this home and be an appendage to him. I, on the other hand, foolishly thought that this was happiness, that this was the expression of his love for me.
I can't go on like this anymore, I can't live this kind of life of reaching out to men and asking for money anymore, I want to find my dignity and worth, and find that independent and confident me.
So, I started going out every day after my children went to school and looking for a job. Although it was not easy at first, I never gave up.
Eventually, I found a job that, although not very well-paid, was enough for me to regain my self-confidence.
At work, I started learning new skills, I started communicating with my colleagues, and I started paying attention to social dynamics. I found that the outside world was so vast, and I could find my place in it.
03
However, he was not touched by my change. He was still immersed in the world of his extramarital relationship, ignoring me and the children.
I knew that our marriage had come to an end and that it was impossible to get it back. So, I plucked up the courage and filed for divorce from him.
At that time, he looked at me in shock, as if he didn't know me. I told him that I was no longer the woman who depended on him and that I could support myself.
Who knows, he actually sneered and said, "Do you think you can live better than me? Without me, you are nothing." ”
I smiled and didn't respond. Because I knew that no matter what he said, it would not change my determination to divorce. Moreover, I firmly believe that I will be able to live well even without him.
After the divorce, I got custody of my children and half of the family property, and my children and I moved back to my parents' house. My parents gave me and my children a lot of warmth and love, and it was precisely because of their help that I had a lot less worries.
Now, we live very happily with our parents and a family of five.
04
Looking back, I am grateful for that painful experience. It made me realize that women can't rely on men to live, and they have to rely on their own efforts to earn respect and value. Although I used to think it was a comedy, now I know that it was a tragedy that made me grow up.
Now I am no longer the woman trapped at home. I have my own career, I have my own friends, and I have my own pursuits. I know that this is the life I want, this is the comedy of my life.
Therefore, I would like to tell all women not to always think about relying on men to live, but to rely on their own efforts to earn respect and value. Don't be afraid of change, don't be afraid to face difficulties, only when you are truly independent, you can live your life to the fullest.
And the man who once said, "Without me, can you live a good life with a shirt to stretch your hands and a meal to open your mouth?" has now disappeared from my life without a trace.
I know that he is no longer a part of my life, and I no longer need to prove my worth to him. Because, I have found myself, I have found my own comedy of life.
Message from the setting moon:
We often say that we must plan for a rainy day in everything and leave a way back for ourselves. The same is true of marriage, in this world, any verbal commitment is risky.
Therefore, if a woman wants to have a happy marriage, she must go out of the house to work, the outside world is very exciting, and a woman with an independent career will be even more exciting.
I hope you can always remember: in this world, only the love of your parents and your own career is your greatest sense of security.