When we are young, we may believe in a saying: the more friends there are, the easier the road to walk, the parents outside the home, and the friends when going out.
Whether the facts are true or not is not certain.
When you live to a certain age, you will realize that true friends are rare and scarce. Many people flaunt the banner of "friends" just to satisfy their own selfish desires. When it comes to making new friends, we must be reassuring and careful to ensure that we have a genuine relationship.
In the future, if you are in an embarrassing situation and become a person with no obvious value, the people around you may gradually leave you.
Don't blame yourself for not knowing people clearly, in fact, human nature is so realistic. When you are still in the stage of naivety and naivety, you may not be prepared enough to face these realities. So, don't rush to maturity and take your time so as not to put yourself under too much pressure.
It's understandable to make mistakes at a young age, but if it's still the case in middle age, it only shows that you're not mature at heart. Once we enter middle age, we should make our lives brighter and more fulfilling. After all, life is too short to make mistakes over and over again. So, let's move towards a mature mindset and a positive attitude towards life, so that our days are wonderful and meaningful.
We need to recognize this and express it easily and formally.
Human time and energy are limited, so we need to find the focus of life and avoid neglecting what really matters. Without a clear goal, we will only get more and more tired. Being too tired can affect our performance and quality of life.
In middle age, there is only one wise way to live: enjoy solitude.
When you have the ability to face yourself alone, it is a sign that you have reconciled with your inner self. At this time, you can make three kinds of renunciations to make your world cleaner and more transparent. This state not only allows you to better face your emotions and heart, but also allows you to truly feel free and calm within.
As García Márquez said in One Hundred Years of Solitude:
"The best state of a person is to be quiet and comfortable when he is alone, and he does not have to worry about other people's emotions or deliberately judge other people's thoughts. Accompany yourself and return to a true self. ”
Indeed, being able to fully enjoy solitude at any age, no matter what age you are, is a sign of true intelligence.
One: Abandon useless socializing
As we get older, our needs gradually change. After middle age, we no longer need a noisy environment, those meaningless gatherings, dinners and socials, etc., if it is not necessary, we can choose not to go. After all, we are more focused on physical and mental health than on the energy consumed by social activities.
These things will constantly drain your energy and make you feel exhausted. Only by enjoying your alone time and doing something truly meaningful and fulfilling from it can you make your life more colorful.
Historically, those who have really achieved great things have often been people who like solitude and can tolerate it.
Van Gogh was a painter who endured the frustration of being ignored all his life, the humiliation of being oppressed, and the incomprehension and bitterness of those around him.
He did not compromise and was not swayed by the tide of the times. On the contrary, between the vast starry sky and the green fields, he painted the most stunning landscapes in his heart, and these works have become the best annotations of his short 37 years of life, which are breathtaking.
People who love loneliness will not let their precious life be mediocre. Temporary setbacks do not discourage them, and on the path they choose, they persistently and firmly play the protagonist of their lives, moving forward step by step.
They experienced the deepest loneliness, but also created the most extraordinary lives.
Two: Give up messy feelings
As we get older, both family and marriage become relatively stable and uneventful. At this stage, we should cherish the people around us and not disturb our minds and proportions because of some irrelevant feelings. Let's keep a cool and clear head and take life in front of us seriously.
Many people try to grasp the tail of youth and talk about extramarital feelings, but mistakenly think that it is love.
Some people give up their marriage and family for the sake of so-called true love, only to bring endless remorse. Divorce and family separation, even their own children will be lost. We should cherish the people and happiness around us, and while pursuing love, we should also consider our responsibilities and obligations.
At the point that the old age is not good, it is destined to make people feel bleak.
Don't wait until you lose it to know how to cherish, we need to learn to grasp the happiness in front of us in order to embark on the right path. Otherwise, if you make a mistake again and again, it will be too late to regret it.
Three: Abandon unrealistic desires
Everyone has their own desires, which are almost innate instincts. However, the right mindset can turn desire into an upward motivation that allows us to keep improving. We should look at our desires with an open and positive attitude and turn them into forces for growth.
If you overdo it, you will bring unnecessary difficulties to yourself. If you can't grasp your own proportions and boundaries, your desire will become a stumbling block on your way forward, and it will make your life more and more unbearable, and you will go more and more confused. Be aware of the importance of maintaining balance so that you can achieve better results and also be more relaxed.
Su Daqiang in the TV series "It's All Good" brought great trouble to his children because of his strong desire. This story shows us the dangers of greed and reminds us to know how to control our desires.
He had material desires, regardless of the actual situation of his children, and let them spend millions to buy a three-bedroom apartment, and also took 60,000 yuan to speculate in stocks, but in the end he was deceived and lost all his money. This is an important warning to us not to cause irreparable harm to ourselves and our families through greed. A better option is to pursue a sensible way of managing your money and live comfortably and happily within what you can afford.
He has a desire for affection, and his daughter Su Mingyu kindly finds a nanny for him to take care of him. But he wanted to marry her, and he wanted to change the name on the title deed to hers. This is surprising and unsettling.
These human desires are often unfulfillable. He could have enjoyed a happy old age, but he let his desires control his life, making life more and more difficult.
As we age, our intelligence will gradually decline, and we are more likely to be confused and unwise. We should clearly distinguish what we should do and what we should not do. If we fail to do so, we may well become a burden to our children. It is very important to keep a clear head and make informed decisions.
At the same time, it will also make you fall into confusion, constantly pull your hind legs, and find it difficult to find the meaning of life.
When people reach middle age, they need to understand that they can give up some things in time to make their lives easier. Enjoying solitude, reconciling with nature, finding the center of gravity in life and the path for the rest of your life can all make the future smoother. We must learn to accept change and face life's challenges with a freer and more relaxed attitude.