The day before yesterday was the big day of my daughter's engagement, and the home was full of festive atmosphere, and every corner was delicately and warmly decorated.
The daughter wore a carefully selected pink dress, which looked elegant and generous. Her face was filled with a happy smile, and her eyes flashed with anticipation and longing for the future. I looked at her and felt an indescribable sense of joy and emotion in my heart.
As a mother, seeing my daughter getting married soon, my heart is full of mixed emotions. On the one hand, I am happy for my daughter, who has finally found her happiness and is about to start a new journey in life.
On the other hand, I am also a little reluctant, my daughter was raised by me, and I still remember every moment of her growth. Now, she is about to leave my shelter and start a small family of her own, which makes me both look forward to it and worry a little.
My expectations for my daughter are very simple, I just hope that she can be happy, I only hope that she meets a man who is as responsible as her biological father, and I also hope that her fate will not be full of ups and downs like mine.
The engagement banquet came to an end in laughter, and when I was busy taking care of my daughter's dowry, my mobile phone rang, and I was stunned to see the mobile phone number that I couldn't get through on weekdays, and even if I did, I couldn't say a few words.
This is my son's cell phone number, who is six years younger than his daughter and has the same half-brother as his daughter. For me, my daughter is my little padded jacket, but my son is an eternal pain in my heart, just because I made the wrong choice in the first place.
My name is Hu Rui and I am 54 years old. My story began on February 18, 1970, when I was born in a small mountain village surrounded by mountains in central Hubei Province.
Although the natural scenery is beautiful, the life of the villagers is very difficult. Due to the geographical environment, every family depends on farming for a living, and the economy is very poor.
I am the fourth in the family with two older brothers, an older sister and a younger sister.
Although most of the people in the village do not attach much importance to the education of girls, my family is relatively well-off. My father has a stable job, which makes our family's life much better than that of other villagers.
What's more, my parents are open-minded about their daughter's education. They believe that both boys and girls should have access to education. Therefore, they gave me and my sister and me the opportunity to enter the school.
I still remember the excitement and curiosity I felt when I walked into the village primary school for the first time with a small schoolbag sewn by my mother.
In 1985, I successfully completed junior high school and was admitted to a normal school. This was a very remarkable thing in the village at that time, because it meant that I would have the opportunity to become a teacher and have a stable job.
I remember the pride and joy on my parents' faces when I saw the results of the high school entrance examination and went home to report the good news to my parents. They prepared a great dinner for me to celebrate the new life I was about to embark on.
After graduating, I became a teacher and was assigned to teach at an elementary school in the town.
During my days of teaching at school, I not only imparted knowledge to children, but also found my love in that bookish environment. My first husband, who was my colleague at school, was a gentle, warm-hearted person.
He always cared for me in his way, whether it was difficulties at work or small things in life, he always greeted me and gave me the greatest support and help. As we got along day after day, I was gradually attracted to his charisma, and the relationship between us took root quietly.
In 1991, we decided to get married hand in hand. The wedding was simple and warm, and after the wedding, we lived in the house that our in-laws helped us build, and it was a time full of love and harmony. Our small home is small, but it is full of warmth and happiness.
Soon after, we ushered in the crystallization of love - a lovely daughter. Her birth brought more laughter to our little family. My husband and I encourage each other at work and take care of our daughter together in life, and we live a very happy life.
However, fate always has a knack for jokes, and the happy days didn't last long. When my daughter was more than two years old, my husband suddenly fell seriously ill. Despite all our medical efforts and efforts to save his life, we were unable to do so.
After my husband died, I felt hopeless and helpless like never before. I hugged my two-year-old daughter and closed my eyes, as if I could still hear his gentle voice echoing in my ears and feel his warm embrace. But now, everything has become so cold and distant.
I hugged my daughter tightly, tears flowed uncontrollably, and the grief in my heart was surging like a tide. I wailed and cried, releasing the pain and reluctance in my heart. My daughter patted me on the back with her little hands, her eyes were full of confusion and fear, she was too young to understand what was going on, only that her mother was crying and her world was shaking.
I felt a deep sense of guilt for not being able to give my daughter a complete home, for having lost her father's love at such a young age. I kept asking myself in my mind, "What would we do without him?" but no one could give me an answer, only an empty room answering my crying.
After I became a single mother, the weight of life really weighed me down. Not only do I have to teach at school and take on the heavy lifting of teaching tasks, but I also have to play the dual role of a parent at home and take care of my young daughter. Every day, I am busy running between work and family, trying to balance the two, but the exhaustion and loneliness in my heart are known only to me.
My parents were full of distress when they saw me working so hard. They sat down with me many times and patiently persuaded me to consider remarrying. They believe that a complete family is essential for the development of children, and that I also need a partner to face life's challenges together.
At first, I was very resistant to the idea of remarrying, because I always had a deep nostalgia and reluctance for my deceased husband. However, as time went on, I gradually realized the painstaking and truth contained in my parents' words.
I am not only a wife who has lost her husband, but also a mother who needs to provide a better environment for her daughter to grow up. I started thinking that maybe I really needed someone to share the pressures of life and give me and my daughter more support and love.
Through the introduction of relatives, I met my second husband, Lao Hu, who seemed to like my daughter very much, and she also played well with him.
In 1998, Lao Hu and I got married. At first, the family was very friendly and accepting of my daughter, and they treated her as their own and gave her the care and education she deserved.
During that time, I felt very relieved that my daughter was finally able to enjoy the warmth of a complete family and that I could also have a partner who shared the responsibilities of the family.
However, life doesn't always go the way one wants. In 2000, I gave birth to a son, which was supposed to be a great event for the family, but it was followed by a subtle change in the relationship within the family. I noticed that since the birth of their son, their attitude towards their daughter has begun to change dramatically. The original love and patience seem to have gradually transferred to the son, and the daughter has received significantly less attention and attention.
This change made me feel very anxious and powerless. I fear that my daughter will feel the difference and that her young mind will be hurt by it. I tried to communicate with Lao Hu and his family, hoping that my daughter would continue to feel the warmth of family.
However, the communication did not have the desired effect, I had to work hard to take care of my daughter, at that time, I can understand Lao Hu's feelings, after all, his son is his own, his daughter is not, it is normal for him to be partial to his son, but what I didn't expect is that they will be so excessive.
In 2009, my daughter was 15 years old, took the high school entrance examination, performed well, and was admitted to the county No. 1 middle school with excellent results. This is a great relief and pride for me.
I am well aware of the importance of education and firmly believe that my daughter can change her destiny through knowledge. However, the joy did not last long, and a heated quarrel broke out in the family about their daughter's future.
Lao Hu and his in-laws have a traditional and conservative view of their daughter's education, believing that it is useless for girls to study, and that their daughter is not their own, so they are not obliged to support their daughter's education.
When they made it clear that they didn't want to support my daughter's education and didn't want me to pay for it, I felt anger and disappointment like never before. The quarrels between us intensified, and the harmony of the family was ruthlessly torn apart.
I can't accept their indifference to their daughter's future, let alone their denial of her right to education. After many fruitless attempts to communicate, I made a difficult decision – divorce.
I know what this decision means for the whole family, but in order to protect my daughter's interests, I must stand up and fight for the future she deserves. As a mother, I would never be able to watch my daughter's future ruined and miserable for the rest of her life.
After the divorce, I was faced with an even more difficult choice – I couldn't take care of my two children. In pain and helplessness, I had to leave my son to Lao Hu. It was a heart-wrenching decision, but I knew I had no choice.
After the divorce, I would give my son living expenses every month and wanted to visit him, but my 9-year-old son couldn't understand my choice.
In fact, before my divorce, no matter how hard I tried, my son couldn't get along with his daughter, saying "she's not my sister, she's a child without a father". Perhaps, from that moment on, it was destined that our family would fall apart sooner or later.
My son not only doesn't like my daughter, but also hates me, thinking that I am not a good mother, as long as my daughter doesn't want him, every time she sees me, she either doesn't say a word, or throws the gift I gave on the ground, shouting and screaming at me, looking at my son's eyes full of hatred, my heart is like a knife, and I regret the decision to remarry even more.
It's been a year since I last saw my son. When I called him, he either didn't answer, or he couldn't say a word, and on weekdays, only when I gave him money, he received it in seconds, and then didn't say a word.
This time, my son suddenly called me to dinner, and I should have been happy, but he chose to come to me after my daughter's engagement banquet, and I naturally understood my son's purpose, but I still went.
As soon as my son saw me, there was no superfluous greeting and he went straight to the point. He asked me how much my daughter received when she got married, and then told me bluntly that he had a girlfriend himself and was about to face the pressure of getting married.
He told me that it would take more than 500,000 to get married, and his father could only come up with a hundred thousand, and he hoped that I could pay the rest. There was a natural attitude in his words that I was obliged to do as a mother.
I listened to my son's words, and my heart was mixed. I knew I owed something to my son, but I also knew that I couldn't make up for it at the expense of my daughter's happiness.
I took a deep breath and told my son firmly, "Your sister's bride price is her own, and no one can covet it." I do feel sorry for you, but I can't help you at the expense of her, she doesn't owe you. ”
I continued: "When I'm old, I don't need you to take care of you. I just hope you understand my decision and find your own happiness. ”
There was a lot of firmness and determination in my words, and I knew it might make my son feel even angrier, but I also knew that I had to stick to my bottom line.
When my son heard this, his emotions became agitated, and he yelled and asked me why I always favored my daughter. I didn't respond, just stood up quietly and turned to leave.
Although my steps were heavy, there was a sense of relief in my heart. I ignored my son's roar because I knew that I had to take responsibility for my daughter's well-being, just as I had made for her education.
On the way home, my heart was filled with emotion. I know that every decision I make as a mother is fraught with difficulties and challenges. But I believe that as long as I stick to my principles and beliefs, and love every child with my heart, I will be able to live up to my heart.
As for my son, I'm thinking about whether I should help him get married and help him as much as I can. After the people around me found out, they persuaded me to leave my son alone, saying that our mother and son were inseparable, and now, I don't know what to do.