Since graduating, I have been working hard in Qingdao, hoping to find my own world. However, the reality is always so cruel, the pressure of work, the triviality of life, the twists and turns of feelings, everything is like a huge stone pressing on my chest, making me breathless......
Home, for me, is a word that is both warm and heavy. I know that no matter where I go, home is always my safe haven, and my parents' love is like a beacon, always illuminating my path.
As I get older, my family's expectations are getting higher and higher, and the topic of urging marriage and going home has become a compulsory part of every call. They don't know that these invisible pressures are one of the reasons why I feel suffocated......
I changed to a city job close to home, but I didn't tell my family about this decision. I'm afraid they'll have more expectations, and I'm afraid they won't be able to bear more pressure. I just want to find a little peace of my own in this strange environment.
Bad things at work, emotional setbacks, I have no friends to talk to. I tried to build a new social circle, but each time it failed. I began to wonder if I really didn't fit in here, if I really should give up.
The double pressure, both physical and psychological, forced me to face my vulnerability. I was sick and lying alone in a rental house, and I couldn't even get up and pour a glass of water. At that moment, I felt alone and helpless like never before......
I longed for someone who could understand me and be there for me. It doesn't take too many words, just a hug, a look, and that's enough to give me strength. But where are such people?
I knew I couldn't go on like this. I need to change, I need to be brave enough to face my problems. I can't run away anymore, I can't worry my family anymore. I want to learn to be independent, to learn to be strong, to learn to deal with every problem in life.
Home, I will come back often, but I can't stay long. I need my own space, I need time to grow, to find my true self. I hope my family can understand me, support me, and give me some time and space.
Tomorrow, I will be stronger. Tomorrow, I will be braver. Tomorrow, I will find the one who can understand me. Tomorrow, I will cherish every opportunity to go home even more, because I know that no matter how far I go, home will always be my home.
Now, I just want to tell myself: don't be afraid, don't run away, don't give up. Believe in yourself, believe in the future, and believe that one day, you will find your own happiness.