Two days ago, I was basking in the sun downstairs, and I met an old lady who was accompanied by her daughter, sometimes sitting on a bench to bask in the sun for a while, and sometimes walking a few steps in the community in the company of her daughter, accompanied by a few laughs from time to time.
The old sister who talked to me said, look, how good you are to have a daughter, this old lady is taken care of by her daughter, how happy.
Subsequently, my sister said that another old lady in the community lived with her son, and because of her bad eyes, she often broke things at home and was reprimanded by her daughter-in-law, and her son also said that the old man "doesn't have long eyes".
Everyone has been young, but everyone will also go to old age, but we are not old now, and we don't understand that many old people can't help themselves, and they can't realize the powerlessness of aging.
So, do you think that when people reach old age, is it a daughter-in-law or a daughter who can take better care of themselves?
After listening to the old sister talk about the experience of the two elderly people in the community, it was really too realistic, and at the same time, I also felt that any age needs to take precautions and prepare for yourself in advance.
Aunt Liu is 78 years old this year, and after her wife passed away, she lived with her son.
Her grandson lives in high school, and her son travels a lot for work, and most of the time she eats with her daughter-in-law and accompanies her.
Before Aunt Liu came to her son's house, she felt that her daughter-in-law was still a good child, filial, sensible, and mild-tempered.
Unexpectedly, after living together, I found that the good attitude and filial piety of my daughter-in-law in the past were just that Aunt Liu and her husband and wife could take care of themselves.
Now that my wife is gone, she is left alone, and her eyes are not good, so she can only rely on her daughter-in-law to make meals in advance at home every day.
At first, the daughter-in-law could politely and politely tell Aunt Liu what she had cooked, and instructed her to put it away after eating and wait for her to come back and clean it up.
After a long time, Aunt Liu will inevitably fall and break things at home, especially when she drank water, Aunt Liu accidentally dropped her daughter-in-law's teacup of hundreds of yuan, and her daughter-in-law got angry and said some unpleasant things.
Aunt Liu's son often travels on business, and he will be away for several months, and he can't stay for a few days when he comes back, Aunt Liu doesn't want to complain to her son, for fear of affecting their relationship between husband and wife, so she can only endure all the grievances by herself.
And when I saw Aunt Zhao accompanied by her daughter, it was obviously different.
Aunt Zhao's daughter graduated from college and returned to work in the city directly, and her small family is in a community with Aunt Zhao.
This year, Aunt Zhao's daughter is retired and can accompany Aunt Zhao wholeheartedly, and her son-in-law also goes directly to Aunt Zhao for dinner after work.
Generally, when the sun is good, my daughter uses the kind of wheelchair that can sit on people and put things to accompany her to see the scenery and go out for a walk.
Tired and sitting in a wheelchair, my daughter pushed, and if she wanted to go, she would get down and walk for a while, and she didn't delay buying vegetables and cooking.
Aunt Zhao's complexion and spirit are obviously happy, she smiles when she meets people, greets happily, and her heart is full of happiness.
In fact, everyone's life is different.
Whether it is a daughter-in-law or a daughter, they have not experienced long-term companionship together, so there are naturally not many contradictions.
When the elderly and their children really live together, they will find that:
From work and rest to diet, as well as attitude towards life, they all have different habits.
So, for the elderly, how to adjust such a life?
First of all, when you are healthy, communicate with your children about your living arrangements in old age, and do not rely on them completely, nor do you ignore them.
No one knows what tomorrow will be like, we need to communicate with our children in advance, life needs them to take care of, what should we do with each other?
Instead, if you need your children to take care of them, you take it for granted, and let your children consciously accommodate themselves.
When we are able to take care of ourselves, we should give each other enough space, understand the boundaries between others, and take care of our children's affairs.
Everything, only by communicating well in advance, can we better solve everything in life, instead of cramming temporarily.
Secondly, families with many children can take turns to accompany and take care of the elderly, and families with only one child, parents should take the initiative to hire a nanny, do not exhaust their children, and think more about their children.
When people reach their old age, they can say anything when they can take care of themselves, but the most feared thing is that when they can't take care of themselves, they need someone to take care of them, and there will be more trouble.
For families with many children, the elderly should first level a bowl of water by themselves, and do not want any child to be easy to talk to, kind and honest, so they will always call the child, but let the children take turns to take care of themselves, and treat the children who contribute money and efforts equally, otherwise, it is easy to hurt the child's heart.
If the children really can't spare time to accompany themselves, they must accept the matter of hiring a nanny, and don't think that the children hiring a nanny for themselves is the unfilial piety of the children, tantrums, tossing, and ultimately suffering from yourself, and hurting family affection.
If it is a parent of an only child, they should feel more sorry for their children, they themselves are under great pressure, and at this time, whether it is a daughter-in-law or a daughter, they may not take good care of them.
After all, they need to work, do housework, and take care of children, and it is inevitable that they will be in a bad mood, and it is really difficult to arrange their own lives and take care of the elderly who are physically inconvenient.
Finally, the elderly and their children should understand and understand each other, so that the family can be harmonious and happy.
When people reach the age of seventy or eighty, most of the children reach middle age, which is the age when all kinds of pressures gather in the body.
If the old man does not understand and understand the child, and boils his own child, or even sends the white-haired person to the black-haired person, it will be even more difficult for the old man.
Therefore, in old age, people must communicate more with their children, listen more to their children's true inner thoughts, and be an "obedient" old man.
In any matter in life, as long as the family's heart thinks in one place, works hard in one place, and thinks of ways together, it will definitely be able to take care of the elderly and let the elderly enjoy a happy and warm life.
In fact, in old age, whether it is a daughter-in-law or a daughter, whoever accompanies you and takes care of you must say "hard work" to whom!
Only by treating each other sincerely and with a grateful heart can we make life better and our families more harmonious and happy!
Author: Huagui Zen Heart
Follow my words and go into your heart. You have a story, I have tea, and we can talk about the rest of our lives together.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.
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