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"Where the are you wasting money again?" I angrily questioned my wife, Xiaofang. She gave me a blank look nonchalantly: "What's the matter with you? I can spend the money I earn as much as I like!"
I gritted my teeth, my fists clenched. This is not the first time, Xiaofang always has this pungent attitude, and she is deaf to my bitter words. Little by little, our married life was on the verge of breaking.
"Actually, we've all lost ourselves in this marriage. I muttered to myself, my eyes darkened, and my face was full of traces of vicissitudes.
I began to think back to the ideals and ambitions of my youth. I used to be a young man full of vigor and fighting spirit, full of infinite hope for the future. But after I got married, I put all my thoughts and energy into my career and family, and gradually lost myself.
And Xiaofang, a once lively and lovely girl, has also become more and more spicy and willful. She seemed to vent all her grievances and grievances on me, turning a blind eye to my care and thoughtfulness.
From that day on, Xiaofang and I were strangers. There is only an invisible barrier between us, ignoring each other and living separately.
Xiaofang's attitude towards money has always made me love and hate. On the one hand, she is always a profligate and has no concept of money; On the other hand, she was always staring at my income, as if I were her banknote press.
"Why are you so stingy? I made all the money myself, why didn't you let me spend it?" Xiao Fang often questioned me like this, with a slight threat in her tone.
I gritted my teeth, my heart full of anger. Of course, I understand that I earn my own money, but I don't have the habit of wasting it in vain! I worked hard for a month just to give my family a stable income, not for her to squander.
As time went on, Xiaofang's behavior became more and more suspicious. She began to become mysterious, often not returning home at night, and not telling me where she went. Sometimes, I would secretly observe her, trying to find some clues in her expression, words and actions.
"Honey, have you been on your minds lately?" Once, I plucked up the courage to ask her.
Xiao Fang replied simply: "It's nothing, it's just that I've been busy with work recently." "
I began to wonder if Xiaofang was having an affair. Because her behavior is so suspicious: she often doesn't go home at night, she becomes more and more cold to me, and she doesn't even have the desire to have sex.
Once, I found a business card of a strange man in her pocket. My heart instantly felt like it was drenched in ice and rain, and the chill pierced through my whole body.
"Who is this, and what do you have to do with him?" I took the business card and questioned Xiaofang.
Xiao Fang said nonchalantly: "Oh, that's one of my customers, don't worry about it." "
I couldn't hold back the anger in my heart anymore, and slapped her hard: "You give me an honest explanation! Are you having an affair behind my back?"
Xiao Fang covered half of her beaten cheek, tears and snot flowed, but she still quibbled and shirked, refusing to admit it at all. It was dark before my eyes, as if the whole world was crumbling before my eyes, and my marriage had come to an end.
Just last week, I stumbled upon Xiao Fang and a strange man making out in a hotel room. My brain almost crashed at that moment, and everything in front of me was like a nightmare.
"You slut! I knew you were fooling around behind my back!" I was so angry that I threw myself and punched and kicked me.
Xiao Fang lay on the ground in embarrassment and cried for forgiveness: "I'm sorry, I was wrong, you can kill me!"
The man was so frightened by my surprise attack that he fled.
My heart was completely cold, and my wife's betrayal hit me hard. The love between us was trampled into the quagmire by her in this way. My heart was filled with anger, betrayal, and despair, and I was on the verge of madness.
When we got home, a heated argument broke out between us that had never been seen before. Xiaofang scolded me for being a "control freak" and a "miser", and I also angrily scolded her for being a "bitch" and a "pickled goods". We are like two wild beasts, you come and go, and no one is willing to back down.
"I've had enough! In the end, I gritted my teeth and made the decision.
Xiao Fang said nonchalantly: "Okay, that's exactly what I want! Anyway, I can't stand you stingy anymore!"
Her arrogant appearance disgusted me. I silently packed some of my belongings and left the home that once belonged to us without looking back. I had completely lost the last hope in my heart for this marriage, and we were doomed to part ways.
After leaving that home, I began a life of wandering. I work at the company during the day and hang out at night at a small hotel. Sometimes, I would sit alone in the corner of the bar, sipping hard liquor glass by glass, as if I wanted to drown out the pain and despair in my heart.
"What went wrong, and how did our marriage get to this point?" I often talk to myself like this, and my face is full of despair and helplessness.
I began to think back to my ideals and ambitions when I was young, and how my once energetic self was smoothed out by reality little by little, and I became depressed. I had deep doubts and doubts about myself and about this marriage.
Just when I was at my weakest, the appearance of an old friend rekindled my hope of survival.
"Dude, what's wrong with you? I haven't seen you in the past few years, you've lost weight like this!" An old friend asked me with concern.
We found a secluded tavern and had a good time. Under the guidance of my old friends, I vomited all these years of suffering and pain. The old friend listened quietly, sometimes nodding, sometimes sighing.
Finally, he looked at me and said solemnly, "Brother, you may have some misunderstandings about Xiaofang. She actually loves you all the time, it's just that there are too many communication barriers between you that cause you to be suspicious of each other. "
I thought about it, and the words of my old friend echoed in my mind. Perhaps, I should give Xiaofang a chance to get to know each other again, instead of giving up our relationship so easily.
After that, I began to reflect on my own definition of love and marriage. I used to naively think that love is 100% trust and possession of each other; And marriage is to lock two people together forever, and no one can escape.
But now, I realize how naïve and narrow-minded this is. True love is mutual understanding, tolerance and respect; Marriage, on the other hand, is to let each other's lives live endlessly under the nourishment of love, rather than mutual imprisonment and control.
After some baptism of thought, I made up my mind to reunite with Xiaofang. I missed her so much that I wanted to hug her and kiss her again.
I called Xiaofang and asked her to meet her at a café. The moment I saw her, I had mixed feelings: on the one hand, I felt the joy of missing her, and on the other hand, I felt extremely ashamed.
"Fangfang, I've been reflecting on myself these days. I realized that the conflicts between us were all due to a lack of communication and understanding. I said sincerely, "I'm willing to start over and cherish our relationship." "
I hugged her and kissed her lightly on the forehead. The two of us looked at each other and laughed, and decided to start all over again and manage this marriage that was once on the verge of breaking.
From that day on, it was like a new page in my life with Xiaofang. We rekindled our love and desire for each other, just like we did when we were in love.
"Honey, shall we go to the movies?" One day, I was walking in the park with Xiaofang in my arms, and suddenly I proposed.
Xiaofang happily kissed me on the face: "Okay, we haven't dated for a long time." "
I hugged her tightly, felt her bare skin, and thought to myself, this is the life we should have. We are husband and wife, the most intimate lovers, and we should grow old together.
In this way, my marriage with Xiaofang was back on track. We have learned to treat each other with tolerance and understanding, rather than arbitrariness and coercion.
Sometimes, I sit on the couch and meditate alone. I think of my old cynical self, always hostile and suspicious of everything around me. But now, I finally realize that there are still so many things in life that we should cherish and be grateful for.
Xiao Fang snuggled up to me by her side, a happy smile on her face. I looked at her deeply and thought to myself, this is my greatest happiness.
Life is like this, there are always some twists and turns in it. But as long as we know how to treat each other with tolerance and understanding, we will definitely find the way to happiness. Marriage is not a matter of one person, but of two people, and it needs to be understood and cherished by each other.
I'm glad that I finally got out of that haze and embraced love and happiness again. From now on, I will cherish everything in front of me, and grow old together with Xiaofang.