Always doubting, always denying, always hiding, always observing, always speculating.
Day after day, I have to be urged to get up before dawn, wipe it indiscriminately and wash up, the time is still early, you can have a quiet breakfast, and along the way you have to take the textbook and memorize a few words or texts. Going to the classroom is a new beginning. In the evening, when it was dark, I was in a hurry to get home, and sometimes there were too many books in my schoolbag that I couldn't close the zipper, and I was afraid that there would be books escaping from it. When you get home, wash your hands, and eat an extra bowl of rice when you have a good appetite, and at most half a bowl when you don't have an appetite, and you don't even have many dishes, just to simply cope with it. When his butt was next to the stool, after several hours of unremitting efforts, he just completed the written homework, sometimes checking the information, sometimes bowing his head to calculate, sometimes meditating, he could only watch quietly, not daring to make a sound, for fear of interrupting his train of thought. At midnight, I have to prepare for tomorrow's homework. In the dead of night, you can hear the snoring of your next-door neighbor. That's the end of the day.
No matter what the result is, I am always trying to move forward, constantly improving, although slowly, but always moving forward. The only drawback is that I don't know the future goal, and maybe it really needs time to test before I can confirm the future direction.