In fact, for psychology majors, narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is the easiest group of people to handle, and there is no one.
And the most critical point of grasping NPD is precisely the characteristic of NPD narcissism.
As long as you take advantage of this, you can make people with narcissistic personality disorder demand what they want from you.
It is important to note that this kind of narcissism is psychological narcissism (excessive self-focus) and not what we usually call narcissism (overestimating oneself).
What is NPD?
Since many people may not know much about what narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is, let's start by talking about what NPD is.
The core problem of narcissistic personality disorder is excessive narcissism.
This type of narcissism refers to the psychological level of narcissism, and the extra attention to the self, which includes one's own feelings, needs, thoughts, etc.
When "narcissism" exceeds a certain level, a new problem will arise, which is the ignorance of external information, and because of the ignorance of external information, a series of misunderstandings will arise.
Once an individual's "narcissism" reaches this level, we can characterize the individual as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
Most of the characteristics we summarize about NPD on a daily basis are caused by "narcissism".
For example, here is a brief summary of the characteristics of NPD:
1) When someone points out their problems, their first reaction is anger, shame, or shame.
2) Likes to instruct others to serve themselves (essentially focusing only on oneself and ignoring the feelings of others).
3) Thinking that only one's own opinion is correct and that everyone else's opinion is wrong.
4) In a person, two contradictory states of inferiority complex and conceit are often manifested at the same time.
5) Lack of empathy and inability to feel the emotions of others.
6) There is a great need for the approval and approval of others.
7) Intimate relationships are difficult to maintain, and various problems are prone to occur.
Since narcissistic personality disorder is not the focus of this article, this is the end of the explanation of the concept of NPD.
Where are the weaknesses of NPD?
The point that NPD is difficult to get along with is that NPD is overly narcissistic, will ignore the feelings of the people around him, and will ignore the objective reality.
In order to maintain the stability of their inner world, they built a very high and solid wall between the inner and outer world.
This will exclude a lot of people and make you feel that it is difficult for you to influence NPD.
At the same time, it also brings a very serious problem, that is:
The NPD has too much of a single way of obtaining information, and the NPD cannot validate its ideas with external information.
Therefore, without deliberate guidance, NPD is easy to produce some wrong concepts and cognitions.
For example, when we are in contact with NPD, we often have such a scenario:
NPD told you one thing, and then you happen to know about it, and know that a lot of the details they say are wrong.
Then you go and say to NPD, "I've seen this, how it is." ”
Even though you see what you say, the NPD will immediately start retorting to you, "What you see is what it is, balabala." ”
This is very typical, the real outside information is excluded from the high wall by the NPD, and then the TA adds a few bricks to the wall in order to maintain its own ideas.
And the wrong perception of TA itself will also be constantly reinforced within the wall.
As for those varied characteristics that NPD exhibits, it is a disadvantage, not a weakness.
And those are not the core problems of NPD.
There is only one weakness in NPD: narcissism.
How do I manipulate NPD?
NPD is really the easiest type of person to control, if you don't believe it, you can go to the psychology/psychiatric department of a tertiary hospital and ask the doctor inside.
They will tell you:
"It's very difficult to cure an NPD, but it's not too easy to control an NPD. ”
You only need to try to enter their inner world, and then guide their thoughts with moderate psychological cues, and you can guide their thoughts in the direction you want at will.
Even if your idea is completely opposite to his/her idea, with a little more time (within 6 months), you can still complete the process of facilitating the NPD idea transition.
One of the most important points is to use guidance and not confrontation.
Many people may feel that there are two difficulties in this process:
1) how to enter the inner world of NPD;
It's actually a lot easier than everyone thinks.
Because NPD is overly concerned with its own inner world, NPD generally has a need that is magnified:
That is, NPD is particularly eager for others to agree with their ideas.
You just need to consistently agree with the idea of NPD and show that you can analyze the problem correctly every time.
Then the NPD will be completely "unguarded" against you.
Although at this time, NPD treats you more as a vassal of their own spiritual world.
But at this point you are already within the walls of the NPD, and you can use some means to influence the NPD.
2) How to apply mental cues
The psychological cues applied to NPD must be through the channel.
Since anyone has two sides, this kind of psychological suggestion is actually very easy to achieve.
Psychological suggestion for NPD, in simple terms, is to throw out a question that they will give an expected answer based on what you know about them, and let them generate ideas that are in line with your expectations in the direction of their own.
Then, by acknowledging and asking questions about the one-sidedness of this idea, you can continue to guide this idea in the direction you envisioned.
One-sided recognition is to screen out a few keywords or ideas that meet your expected direction from the other party's expression, and recognize and agree with these points.
The good thing about this kind of psychological suggestion is that you don't share your true thoughts throughout the whole process, and all your thoughts and opinions are brought up by them.
And just by asking questions and acknowledging them, they can get their ideas in sync with what you expect.
3) How to deepen the other person's cognition
For NPD, to deepen their thinking and cognition, another point is to make certain ideas you don't want to form a confrontation with them.
For example, in the previous process of psychological suggestion, you have made NPD think that intimacy is important to a person.
Then you need to pit the opposite view of this view, which is the idea that intimacy is not important to a person, against them.
It's not that I'm denying you, it's that the idea that intimacy doesn't matter to a person is denying what you know now.
You can say what people who feel that "intimacy is not important to a person" have said and what they have negated your thoughts.
Then the NPD will naturally speak of this point of view, and the group of people who represent this point of view will be excluded from their own psychological boundaries.
And the point you want will be strengthened in the process.
Finally, any kind of manipulative behavior towards a person is selfish, and if you feel that someone is not what you like, then it is better to find a new person you like than to waste time on this person.
Author: Me and the little luck of avoidance