Text/Zhong Niannian
Figure/From the Internet Infringement, please contact to delete
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The relationship between people requires a certain amount of wisdom and proportion to maintain, and only people who know how to grasp the scale can create a good social relationship.
Many times, many feelings drift apart not because we do something wrong, but because you do too much, making the other person unbearable, and knowing how to stop in moderation is really smart.
No matter how good the relationship is, don't take the initiative to do these things, as soon as you take the initiative you will lose.
01: Don't take the initiative to withdraw money
Qian Zhongshu once said: Money is a mirror that can reflect the direction of feelings.
I deeply believe that many people's relationship breakdown is caused by money, and once you talk about money, it is equivalent to pushing a good relationship to the edge of the cliff.
Why are so many people unable to stand up to talking about money? Because people's hearts are inducing, and most people will keep to themselves, but in the face of money, many people often can't hold on to it and take risks.
For example, when you show off your possessions to your friends, they may blush, and once the desire swells, the friendship will be gone.
Therefore, it is the truth to keep a low profile in relationships, and don't talk about money casually, let alone involve money issues.
If you don't want to be disappointed in the relationship, and you don't want to spend time making up for it later, don't talk about money.
Usually playing happily and occasionally thinking about each other, this is already the top state in the relationship.
02: Don't offer to help
We all think that if we take the initiative to help our friends, we will also gain their gratitude and promote the longevity of the friendship, but in fact the truth is often the opposite.
First of all, some people don't deserve your initiative to help, if you are just friends or business contacts, you don't have to go through such a lot of trouble at all, and it is best to stop in moderation.
Secondly, when you want to help others, you should first understand that not everyone wants to be helped by you.
My colleague Xiaoyou once proposed that there was a friend who made him unbearable, although the other party was very kind and always helped him, but Xiaoyou was not grateful, because his help was not what Xiaoyou wanted.
For example, he often helps Xiaoyou introduce objects, but in fact, Xiaoyou doesn't want to talk about emotional problems at all, the more active this friend is, the more Xiaoyou feels irritable.
Over time, he took the initiative to cut off contact and never associate with him again.
That friend may feel very aggrieved, obviously he is helping Xiaoyou, why did Xiaoyou ignore him instead?
As everyone knows, this is the truth in the relationship, and helping without the consent of others is equivalent to disturbing.
Your sincerity can only blossom when it is used by others, otherwise it will be self-inflicted.
Rather than wasting time and adding to disappointment, it is better to respect others.
Respect is the best way in a relationship, and when you choose to respect others and not help casually, others will thank you.
03: Don't take the initiative to ask about other people's privacy
Everyone has privacy in their hearts, there are unknown corners, even the best friends, no matter how close people, it is difficult to share with each other, it is these privacy that allow us to maintain our independence and uniqueness.
If you really want the good of others, you must know how to respect the privacy of others and don't ask random questions.
Even if you have the purpose of caring for him, don't do such a stupid thing, because there is no way for others to tell you, and it will increase the burden anyway.
In interpersonal communication, you must know that there are some things to ask and some things not to ask, and if you don't know how to define them, you can empathize and listen to the feelings of others.
Being nice to a person is to make him comfortable, not to make him embarrassed, and when you can push yourself and others, you know what to do.
A really good relationship should be to the point and please each other, rather than taking the initiative to do these few things and put each other in a dilemma.
I hope we can all understand these truths, stop being self-righteous and manage friendships, and mastering a certain amount of wisdom will make each other's feelings stronger and brighter in the future.
END.