Written by / First Psychology Writers
Editor / Tommy
Recently, I swiped a video of a waiter making a plate of salad in a restaurant in Shanghai, only to see him add lettuce and bacon, pour in salad dressing, and rub some cheese, the whole process is very simple.
Until the moment I saw the price, I froze, 206.8 yuan.
It's Shanghai, maybe it's the breakfast of the rich.
In contrast, as a wage earner, I don't have more than 20 yuan a meal, isn't it a bit shabby, not only that, but I am often ridiculed for it.
For example, my college classmate with an annual salary of 400,000 yuan, his most common words are:
"Why are you eating a boxed lunch again. ”
This reminds me of last year's hot search, an emotional big V published a joke on a certain blog, but his expression all revealed his disdain for the lives of the bottom groups, which sparked heated discussions among netizens.
49 yuan buffet barbecue lunch, red rice mobile phone, play happy landlord, use Pinduoduo, go out to take the subway bus, live in a rental house. In the eyes of the vast majority of people, this is the ordinary life that ordinary people are experiencing.
But in the eyes of some big V people, this kind of ordinary life has become the life of the poor, and only the poor will live such a life.
This reminds me of a story that took place during the Western Jin Dynasty, and the protagonist of the story was Emperor Hui of the Jin Dynasty.
He was born stupid, not like a normal person. At that time, there was great chaos in the world, and people were dying of hunger everywhere. When Emperor Jin Hui saw this scene, he actually asked such a sentence: "Why don't you eat minced meat?" which means that since they have no food to eat, why don't they go to drink meat porridge?
Since then, the phrase "why not eat minced meat" has been used to satirize unrealistic comments made by people who don't know the full picture or who haven't experienced the suffering of others.
In fact, in life, such people can be seen everywhere.
Some time ago, the bitter gourd brigade became popular on the short video platform. What is the Bitter Melon Brigade?
It refers to those rural mothers who share their own babies and daily life. Their living conditions are generally poor,,,, which is a significant sign of the bitter gourd brigade.
Indeed, in the eyes of some women who have received modern education, the behavior of these rural mothers is very "cheap". They guard their husbands who don't do anything, and they take on all the housework alone.
Even so, when their husbands bring them a little favor, they are still immersed in their own happy world, which makes many people have a feeling of "hating iron does not become steel".
However, under the videos of these bitter gourd brigades, such a comment is always indispensable. They show off their superior lives, I don't know if they are mocking each other, or showing off, or both, in short, it makes people look very uncomfortable.
What they do is actually no different from the big V at the beginning.
In this regard, some netizens commented: After being high for a long time, I don't know what kind of life ordinary people live?
The "49 yuan poor man's lunch" that caused public anger on the Internet, how many such high-ranking people were exposed?
What kind of deformed spiritual world is reflected behind the behavior of these people?
From a psychological point of view, showing off is part of human nature. In primitive societies, people needed to compete with their opponents by showing off their stature, appearance, and abilities in order to gain the right to mate.
Therefore, to some extent, wanting to show off to others is originally a relatively normal behavior.
However, there is a certain limit to this behavior, and beyond this limit, it reflects the evil of human nature.
Adler, a master of psychology, once said, "Behind any kind of behavior that is above others, there is actually a strong sense of inferiority." ”
In other words, the more a person likes to show off, it actually means that the person has an inferior self-esteem in his heart.
This is what we often say, the more a person values something, the more he likes to show off, and the more a person lacks something, the more he likes to show off.
In fact, the inner world of this kind of person is very scarce and very painful. They treat everyone as their imaginary enemy, and measure the value of other people's lives by standards that do not apply to everyone.
Only in the face of those,
But in fact, there is no uniform standard in this world, and everyone's life is different. Some people think that success in their careers is happiness, some people think that having power and money is happiness, and some people think that coarse tea and light rice are happiness.
Not everyone has to live according to a uniform standard, which is a misunderstanding of life.
People who are truly rich in heart don't care about these things at all. Rather than laughing at others and showing off themselves, people who are truly rich in heart are more concerned about the motives behind the actions of others.
For example, why are the mothers of the bitter melon brigade unable to leave them because of a little favor from their husbands?
Is it because they have never had real love?
Or is it because they are not well educated?
As a result, those who are truly wealthy in their hearts will pay more attention to the education of women. At the same time, they will also put their love into these issues that concern them.
So you see, those top billionaires are not only the richest people in the world, but also philanthropists.
It is precisely because they are at the top of the world that they can see the pain of ordinary people's homes, which is great love.
And those who think they are superior are without exception narrow-minded, they live in their own narrow values, and they laugh at those who work hard to live with ridiculous behaviors and ideas.
In fact, the real pathos is themselves.
Can't the poor have romance? Do all romances have to be measured by a certain standard?
A netizen's comment wrote: Not everyone knows about Starbucks and Chanel. Ordinary people have their own romance.
I will always remember that when I was very young, my father would buy me a bag of Want Want Jelly every time I got off the night shift. It wasn't expensive, less than two dollars at the time. If, according to these people, the heart can be measured by money, then my father's love for me is not worth mentioning.
But that's not the case, it's not just a bag of snacks for me, it's a dad's love. Until now, this detail has stuck in my memory.
The life of ordinary people is as simple as that. Earn a few pennies and spend a few pennies, life is your own, and the life you live is also your own. No matter how well others live, it has nothing to do with themselves.
Maybe many people will be envious, but after envy, they just smile and continue to live their own small lives.
There is no end to the days of comparison. These people with low self-esteem are actually lacking in their hearts, and their sense of self-worth is very low, and they can only show their worth and prove their existence through the story of things.
Not only that, but their hearts are also tormented, because they are forever in anxiety, and there will always be people in this world who are richer than them.
And the reason why they want to laugh at others is nothing more than to let others be affected by this anxiety and join in this involution and anxiety, so that they will have more sense of achievement.
Therefore, when facing such people, one must not fall into their trap. Life is a one-way street, and it has nothing to do with you whether other people's lives are good or bad. Only by focusing on your own life can you see a different landscape.
-The End -
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
Keywords: social psychology, psychology
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