On the subway, a mother led her daughter to sit next to me. The little guy seems to have endless words, and he says this and that to his mother one by one. And whenever the mother speaks, she always listens sideways and then answers her daughter's words. The voice is gentle and patient, even if the child says a sentence several times, sometimes the words do not reach the meaning, and the mother does not show impatience.
At that moment, I suddenly felt ashamed that I was also a mother, who was able to listen patiently to my children, while I always felt that my brother and sister were slow to speak, or did not know what to say and interrupted them loudly. Looking at this scene, I feel that I am not a good mother.
Talking to children becomes a "luxury"
On the way home, I have been reflecting on the fact that we used to be very patient with the babbling children, but since when did we start to have no time to chat with the children. According to a survey, 70% of Chinese parents do not have time to spend with their children. So why don't these 70% of parents have time to talk to their children?
The first type: high work pressure
Parents of dual-income workers spend a lot of time at work, and when they are stressed, they may have to work overtime when they come home at night, which leads to not having enough time and energy to listen to their children.
Second: Electronic devices take up a lot of time
My cousin likes to read e-novels, and in addition to work, when he goes home, he also holds his mobile phone and reads novels most of the time. The sister-in-law couldn't get used to it, so she asked him to accompany the two more babies. So as soon as my cousin came home, he first hugged the child and played for a while, and then immersed himself in the world of mobile phones.
In fact, this is ineffective companionship, but many parents are like this, spending more time on mobile phones, tablets, computers and other electronic devices, but they do not have the energy to talk and chat with their children.
The third type: family stress
Many people think that stay-at-home mothers will spend a lot of time with their babies, but not all mothers are like this. Some stay-at-home mothers face financial pressure, marital problems, etc., due to family pressure, which will cause them to have no patience and energy to listen to their children, and it is likely that their children will interrupt irritably as soon as they speak.
Fourth: lack of awareness
Some parents don't realize the importance of listening to their children, so it is difficult to give enough attention and patience to chat.
Children who "talk a lot" have smarter brains
Many parents always ask their children to "shut up" or interrupt their children when they talk too much. In fact, there are a lot of studies that show that children who talk a lot have smarter brains.
Hu Xianxu, who has grown from a child star to an outstanding young actor, is no stranger to everyone. From many images of him when he was a child, it can be seen that this is a child who can speak well. Because of the character of the ghost horse elf and the cross talk jokes that come easily, he was also called "Deyun Club fugitive cross talk actor" by netizens.
However, when he was a child, Xiaohu was thought to have a problem with his IQ by the teacher because he talked a lot and loved to move, and he took his classmates to encourage him. Later, after his parents took him to test his IQ, they found that the IQ of this talkative child surpassed 87% of human beings.
Harvard University psychology expert Jay Gardner once conducted an experiment and found that when young children can't speak, their IQ is not as good as that of chimpanzees. But once they start talking, IQ skyrockets. The results of this experiment show that language IQ is the first IQ of children.
Many parenting experts recommend that parents carry out prenatal education or talk to their babies more, so that when parents are chatting with their babies, sound can stimulate the "Broca's zone" of the child's brain.
Broca's area and Wernicke's Broca's area is a region of the brain that is responsible for the processing of verbal information and the production of discourse. Constant stimulation of the Broca's zone helps the child's brain develop better and the language system is more perfect. Because of this, those children who can speak well will be relatively smarter and smarter.
Tips: 0-3 years old is a critical period for children's brain development, thousands of neural links will be established, and language is the switch to start neural links, so talk to your children more!
The benefits of parental chatting
Talking to your child not only promotes brain development, but also helps your child grow better. Take a closer look at those excellent children, who usually have a parent behind them who will "talk". Parents must know the benefits of chatting with their children more about their growth, so let's move on!
Benefit 1: Good communicator
There is a topic on the hot search: 7 minutes and 37 seconds of internal entertainment. This is an entry created by Hu Xianxu communicating with another companion in a variety show. It can be felt from the video that Hu Xianxu is a very good communicator, he guides and resolves the emotions of the other party, and at the same time, he also expresses his own opinions and unhappiness.
Because of this conversation, the team's later itinerary is more perfect and enjoyable. And Xiaohu's ability to have such communication skills is inseparable from the education of chat and interaction between his family and him in his childhood.
There is a sentence in the book "Critical Conversations": Most of the things that affect your life, if you study it carefully, are the result of poor communication. Parents chatting with their children more will improve their thinking and logic skills, as well as their language skills.
Benefit 2: Enhance parent-child relationship
When the child is adolescence, many parents feel that a wall has been erected between them and the baby, and they can't get into the child's heart, which has a lot to do with chatting with the child.
If you have a good chat with your child, they will be willing to express their emotions and hearts, and the parent-child relationship will be harmonious, otherwise, they will become indifferent and alienated, which is not conducive to the child's growth.
Therefore, parents should chat with their children every day to make them feel cared for and valued, which is more conducive to their future growth.
Benefit 3: Shape good values
The family is the first school for children to grow up, parents are the first teachers they come into contact with, and the family has a profound impact on children's values.
Chatting is an important way to convey family values, and when encountering some problems, parents are educating their children by sharing their own experiences and opinions, and at the same time, they are also forming their correct values.
In the early morning, my mother came to chatter:
Think about how easy it is to chat, we will talk to our lovers, friends, colleagues, and even strangers on weekdays, but don't forget to talk to your children. Chatting is the key to promoting your child's all-round development.
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