During the winter vacation, even if you don't study, you have to exercise, and instead of trying to cultivate grades, it is better to find your child's longboard

The winter vacation is coming, how to let children gain and grow during the holiday? How to let children spend a happy and meaningful winter vacation? On the other hand, how should children use electronic products during the holidays, how to teach children to make reasonable use of electronic products, and how to prevent children from overindulging in them? Zheng Runzhi, a family education expert, worked together to help children develop a unique, practical, scientific and reasonable winter vacation plan.

Key takeaways:

• 1

  During the holidays, you need to help your child protect his or her learning status and plan for his studies.

• 2

  The necessary condition for overtaking in corners is to improve ability, parents need to improve their own energy and cognitive level, and identify their children's ability shortcomings.

• 3

  Instead of going to great lengths to develop your child's strengths and grades, it is better to look for your child's longboards. Give your child the freedom to spend time exploring their interests during the holidays, and develop independence and self-regulation.

• 4

  Each parent's educational ability may also be different, whether they can see the child's ability and shortcomings, which is the basis for targeted improvement of the child's ability.

• 5

  Exercise is far more important to children than studying, and even if you don't study during the winter vacation, you should exercise yourself. Exercise may produce serotonin, dopamine, and adrenaline, which are key elements for our mental and physical growth and essential for brain development.

Sunny Mom: How to balance homework and rest time during the winter vacation, so that children can complete their homework and rest enough?

Zheng Runzhi: The holiday is a time when children are looking forward to and want to relax, so it is very important to give children a lot of free time to arrange themselves. Many children like to stock up on homework, and when it comes time to start school, they frantically make up for it. In fact, learning is a long-term thing, to maintain a good state of learning, it is recommended that parents at the beginning of the holiday can let their children rest for a few days, and then take out the total amount of the entire learning to divide, to the end of the holiday can be slightly increased, during the holiday can be set up every day 20 minutes to half an hour, in this time period to efficiently complete the learning task, protect the learning state. There are many festivals in the winter vacation, which may be greater for the growth and harvest of children, and housework and family responsibilities need to be considered. We can consider these core points and conduct a comprehensive parent-child discussion with the child, and finally come up with a plan that the child sincerely approves, which is more important.

Thundercloud Dragon: The time period of winter vacation is relatively short, and the festival is very congregated, and it is in winter. Because of the fluctuation of circadian rhythms, winter is a season with a high incidence of mental illness. Our learning system is called a closed-loop system, which is divided into a preview stage, a class stage, a review stage, a review stage and an exam stage. The two phases of preview and review can be carried out during the winter vacation, and doing homework is actually a review process. Children's self-planning ability is called preview, and preview, as a repetitive link, can effectively help us to repeat the closed loop of the system in the next semester during the winter vacation, so as to achieve the effect of efficient learning. If you are a teacher, I recommend not assigning homework, because this matter is not very related to the two links of preview and review, and you can manage smart goals according to your own situation. If parents have high requirements for their children, then find a learning method that suits their children, and it is possible to overtake in corners through self-planning adjustments during the winter vacation. If the expectations of the child are not high, pay more attention to the child's psychological growth and mental health, and personally recommend letting the child find the happiness of childhood by himself.

Sunny Mom: When making a winter vacation plan, how do you arrange beneficial activities and lessons for your child according to their interests and strengths?

Lei Yunlong: In front of us, most children have time, but parents don't have time for specific planning and training. Even if we do something that focuses on specialties, who takes the children to do it is a problem that most families face. The second is that if parent-child companionship can be achieved, children at a young age can develop their interests and hobbies in a specific way. If parents have the ability to take their children to travel thousands of miles, I think it is also a good direction. The third is specific planning, multiple children's personalities, interests, hobbies are different, I think it is to find the same in the different, there must be a similar theory of the foundation, that is, the underlying logic of education, I think this underlying logic is the universal quality education or the learning methods, learning planning, necessity requirements of this stage, and we must be able to find some common ground for specific development.

Children under the age of nine can be encouraged to support and help them promote their specific interests and strengths; children between the ages of nine and thirteen are critical periods of psychological growth, which determine the development and cultivation of the three views in the later stage, and parents must begin to intervene and carry out the necessary planning. The most important thing is to solve the pre-problem, how do we arrange the corresponding time, so that children can get rid of the control of mobile game short videos.

Zheng Runzhi: Teaching students according to their aptitude should first see the differences in each child's abilities and characteristics, and any child will have the shortcomings of his ability. The holiday season is a rare time for the whole family to be together to improve the child's ability. Many parents say that their children can only play with their mobile phones, but when they complain, they do not know exactly what I want my children to do, and they only think that their children should do the right things, but which ones are the right things? As long as the children are studying, the parents will be relieved; when the children are idle, the parents are very anxious. In this case, parents should improve their own energy and manage their emotions. Each parent's educational ability may also be different, whether they can see the child's ability and shortcomings, which is the basis for targeted improvement of the child's ability.

Normally, children need to improve more than a dozen abilities, and the first is concentration, and there are several major elements in concentration, such as children's concentration and persistence. Usually children are always in a daze, and it is easy to lose time when writing homework, but the concentration and persistence of children's concentration can be improved during the holidays. If parents have the ability to identify, they can let their children arrange their own time, play easily, and use 10-15 minutes to improve their children's concentration when they have time to interact with them. When the school starts, the child's ability has gone up, the shortcomings have been filled, and the class will be serious and attentive, and the efficiency will be improved. Some children have insufficient emotional intelligence, poor emotional ability, retreat in the face of difficult problems, emotional irritability, even if the brain is smart, it does not work, during the holidays, the family can play some emotional intelligence games, exercise children's emotional recognition, processing ability, after the start of school encounter some academic challenges have mental support. During the holidays, it is not necessary for children to write homework and engage in sea tactics, and the necessary condition for overtaking in corners is that the ability to go up accordingly. If you don't improve your ability, you can only work on the results, which is sometimes a waste of energy and time. If you are in a multi-child family, each child's abilities may be complementary, and you may motivate one child and may inspire other children at the same time.

Therefore, first of all, we must train our own sharp eyes, whether they have the ability to recognize, and whether they have the ability to keep up. After identifying the child's ability shortcomings, take a little time every day to make targeted special adjustments for the child. A lot of training is integrated in the family scene, and it doesn't need to be deliberately carried out at all, as long as you know what your child is lacking, you can easily come to your child's ability.

Sunny Mother: There is a very core point of concentration, when children like one thing, it belongs to active concentration, without parents to say, they can remember a lot of things. If parents find that their children really like a certain point, they don't have to worry about whether it is reliable, but help their children change from consumption to creation. We have encountered a very interesting case before, a child who is a top student suddenly became addicted to online games, and then his mother accompanied him to play, and realized that playing games also requires talent and skills. In order to let the child not be too addicted to online games, the last solution we gave was to let the child pick up the bug in the game and ask the child if he wanted to fix the bug in the future. Then after the mother told the child, his son took a very good 985 and studied this direction. Instead of going to great lengths to develop your child's strengths and grades, it is better to find your child's strengths. One thing that parents should keep in mind is that the holiday arrangements should not duplicate school matters, but should still be differentiated.

Sunny Mom: During the winter vacation, how to encourage children to participate in outdoor activities, exercise and enhance immunity?

Zheng Runzhi: Exercise is very important for children, and children's anxiety, depression and other emotions are directly related to the amount of exercise. If the brain does not let the brain secrete dopamine and enter a relaxed state, it will be in a state of tension at school, which will cause children to have a lot of emotional problems. However, because the exercise time at school is limited, the child's body develops a lazy inertia, so he would rather be lazy and not move. First of all, you can add a little external conditions in the morning to let the child wake up naturally. For example, a little melodious music, the sound of activity outside, especially some of the music that he likes more. After waking up, let the child move at home, such as the butterfly breathing method of three minutes every morning, the child may not be able to do three minutes at first, but it can be reduced to two minutes or one minute. The power of repetition is very powerful, and I am able to do a small thing every morning. Then you can accompany your parents downstairs to buy breakfast and take a walk, and then the child will naturally go downstairs. If you talk bluntly about exercising for half an hour at once, the child will definitely not want to. Many times with the interaction with the child, these key points are very important, first of all, there is a very enthusiastic state of life, the child is affected by the parents' living conditions, through the vitality and wisdom of the parents to drive the child's action, rather than blunt demands and complaints. No matter how clever the communication method is, it is just words, and actions are the most convincing weapons. Some parents say that their children are addicted to mobile phones, and time will always be filled, and they are afraid that their children will be addicted to mobile phones, so they can fill up with happy time, and they can study cooking, sports, and play family games with their children. Only a boring life will lead to a life in which children will be addicted and depressed. changed the depressed life, and the child naturally changed.

Lei Yunlong: The importance of sports to children is far more important than learning, even if you don't study during the winter vacation, you have to exercise. Exercise may produce serotonin, dopamine, and adrenaline, which are key elements for our mental and physical growth and essential for brain development. Parents should be aware that they need to have a fuller sense of energy, and through action, they should cause their children to reflect and generate a new stream of consciousness. The environment is decisive and shapeshifting for people, so it is necessary to control the emotional and physical environment. The emotional environment is roughly divided into three types according to the child's learning type: auditory, visual, and sensory, which are assessed according to the child's hyperactivity and attention. Then adjust and stabilize the child's emotions to ensure that the child has a good effect of playing, learning, and exercising.

In many cases, parents must rely on their own life experience to point out a path for their children to avoid detours. Here are three suggestions for you, consciously observe the role of learning role models, especially the role of parents. The second is the threshold effect, parents may not have time to do a good job of companionship, and when they can be accompanied, they must be able to accompany efficiently and rhythmically. In the face of children, they should know how to show weakness, for example, let the children investigate how many people in the community carry out sports during the winter vacation, let the children feel the experience and observe first, give feedback to the parents, and the parents must give timely support, give the children some material or spiritual rewards, and let the children start to adhere to them through slow guidance, so that the children can gain a sense of existence in action. The third is to let children participate in as simple sports as possible, which can be implemented immediately, such as jumping on the TV and frisbee, which can be formulated according to your own situation.

Sunny Mother: During the winter vacation, children may face some psychological pressure and confusion, how can parents pay attention to their mental health and give effective psychological support and guidance?

Zheng Yunzhi: I found that parents are trying hard to educate their children well, but the real educational goals are not clear. If this point is not clear, it is easy to be disturbed by the information of the external environment, and it will be very confusing internally. In fact, the goal of parenting is to help children become a better version of themselves in a very simple and popular phrase. Then it is necessary to identify what kind of seed the child is, what are the characteristics, what are the strengths, and what is the current state. If you can't even understand the current state, there is no way to help the child. Some parents have no awareness of depression, and unilaterally think that their children should study hard and not take their children's emotions seriously, so various problems explode at a certain age. For example, if the child does not know how to make friends, parents can teach him how to make friends, and if the child has sleep disorders, through the comprehensive use of simple methods such as mindfulness meditation, relaxation before bedtime, and a fixed amount of exercise every day, the child can sleep well and his emotional problems can also be improved. It's not that parents can't help their children, but they don't understand how their children need their parents to help them. Parents need to raise awareness and do something during the holidays to help with ideas. Don't label your child casually, thinking that the child is rebellious, disobedient, doesn't want to learn, and is lazy, but draws a question mark in your heart, and may not understand the child, at this time you can improve your cognition. The speed of improving cognition is actually very fast, and by reading a book or listening to a lesson, you can establish a lot of important concepts and make adjustments in various aspects. As a parent, it is necessary to grasp the educational goals and improve the overall cognitive level and educational ability as you grow older. It's not that the more you give, the better the child can be, but that you pay to the child's needs, so that the child can really become good.

Sunny Mom: Children are addicted to electronic products during the winter vacation, how to effectively guide them to stay away from screens and develop healthy living habits?

Sunny Mom: Our house will be divided into areas, the area where parents need to work, and the area where children play is a separate area, this area is open once or twice a week without a coffee table, sofa and TV. In this area, no one is allowed to play with electronic devices, and if you make a phone call or play with your mobile phone, you have to go to another room. Once there is a boundary, everyone will abide by it, and slowly a consensus will be formed in our family that it is to give boundaries and respect. The second is that no one is the one being served, and once someone is the one being served, the child's time needs to be filled, and the child needs a mobile phone at this time. When the time is free, the child naturally knows how to spend it, once the time is taken out of the electronic products, you will find that people are not bored, there must be other interesting ways to spend it.

Sunny Mom: What are the differences and pertinence of winter vacation plans for children of different ages, and how to teach them according to their aptitude?

Zheng Runzhi: Children need more high-quality companionship, younger children need more, and older children need less time. Before the age of three, children must want to be with their parents as much as possible, and at the age of three to six, they need to let go appropriately to cultivate children's self-satisfaction and independence. Parents between the ages of six and 12 need to be present at critical moments to make critical capacity improvements. Children and parents must drift apart, and it is very important to allow gradual separation.

Lei Yunlong: From the perspective of middle and high school, you can have a week of relaxation time after the holidays, and the rest of the time needs to do two things to plan, one is sports, and the other is academic planning. Winter and summer vacations are the only opportunities to potentially progress better than others. During the winter and summer vacations, you should define your goals in a phased and structured manner, and start self-analysis from now on, so that you can know which subject is good, which subject is not good, where your weaknesses are, and where your points are. Use specific goal management methods to do things on a daily basis, and these goals are oriented to complete the gaps. At this stage, the plan, excerpts, and error correction books are completed, and the extensive filling is carried out, and the learning after the beginning of the school year should be dismantled, and the thinner and thinner will be.

Primary school is a particularly good period of replenishing energy, in addition to learning language and mathematics, compared with the multiple subjects in junior and senior high school, primary school is a critical period for learning and accumulating the main subject. The first is to plan English words well and use fragmented time to learn flashcards. The second is mathematics, which we divide into four rhythms: hard calculation, clever calculation, quick calculation, and estimation. Do some clever content and technical improvement, thinking expansion. The last is the accumulation of language, children will have a new experience from elementary school to junior high school, language is related to the growth of a person's life, and will let children see the rich and colorful side of the world. In general, the three main subjects in primary school are very important, junior high school counterattacks and turns, and high school works hard to learn according to its own model.

Sunny Mom: I have benefited from my reading and playing experience in elementary and junior high school, and I especially encourage everyone to use other fun ways to expose children to general knowledge of some subjects when they are young, which is a kind of review when they are in middle and high school. All effective learning is a new connection generated by old knowledge. If it's not time to work hard, let your child read, watch, and play something he really enjoys during the holidays. In junior high and high school, parents can help their children very little, and in the primary school stage, children can have things they like, can self-regulate, have good social relationships, and maintain interest and curiosity about subjects, which is a very good state.

Moderator:

Sunny Mother丨Tencent News Knowledge Officer, National Second-level Psychological Counselor

Guests:

Lei Yunlong丨Doctor of Psychology, special teacher

Zheng Runzhi丨National certified psychological counselor, family education expert

Organisation: 廖晞冕

Review: Cai Juan

Copyright Notice:This article is an exclusive manuscript of Tencent Parenting, and it is forbidden to be reprinted by the media without authorization, but you are welcome to forward it to your personal circle of friends.