Read good books and choose another possibility for your life
Books provide nourishment for our spiritual life, and reading will make our spiritual life extremely strong.
Xiaoyue recommends 15 Douban high-scoring books to let us understand the world and see ourselves clearly. After all, whether it's driving away confusion or fighting mediocrity, reading books is the easiest and most practical way.
The Instinct to Cure
Douban score: 8.9
Accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP) is a psychotherapy method developed by Dr. Diana Fuxia in the 90s of the 20th century on the basis of psychodynamic psychotherapy, integrating the latest advances in the field of contemporary attachment theory, transformational theory, affective neuroscience and other psychotherapy, representing the latest development direction of psychotherapy.
Compared with traditional psychotherapy methods, AEDP is characterized by a tendency towards healing, rather than psychopathology, emphasizing that "healing begins from the moment the client begins contact with the therapist". This healing comes from the client's innate drive to heal and thrive, which Dr. Diana called "transformational force."
Yang Zhaoqian, author of The Instinct to Heal: Awakening Transformation with AEDP, combines classic AEDP theory with traditional Chinese wisdom and simplifies this set of repetitive patterns through his original mantra – one force, two learning, three grasping, two tracking, sixteen vertical and horizontal turns, one emphasis, and three meta-processing. In addition, he also.
"Born Different"
Douban score: 8.9
The author of this book, Temple Grandin, is not only a professor of animal behavior but also a world-renowned person with autism (autism), with her unique perspective and exquisite scientific strokes, she elaborated on the causes, diagnostic criteria, early intervention, treatment methods, as well as the thinking patterns, sensory problems, emotional problems, and interpersonal communication of autistic patients, opening a window for us to experience the subjective experience of autism and to understand the world of autistic people up close.
"Let children be their unique selves"
Douban score: 8.9
There is no such thing as a good or bad temperament. Good education is to respect children's innate temperament and follow their nature, so as to achieve children's unique potential.
In this book, the author uses Professor Wang Shuquan of the Chinese Academy of Education Sciences to help parents discover and understand children's temperament and personality, analyze six common personality problems in children, and help everyone see how different temperament types play a role behind personality.
On the issue of children's education, the author shared four views of natural education: child development, parent-child relationship, teacher-student relationship and peer relationship, and summarized nine excellent character qualities and cultivation methods that can help children become unique themselves.
Finally, the author also reminds readers to keep their eyes open and discern the "thunder" that may be buried in family education, that is, the so-called "happy education", "sheep herding education", "tiger parents and tiger mothers", "can't lose at the starting line", "expectation education" and other specious and inconsistencious educational concepts.
"Be a friend with time and the wind"
Douban score: 8.8
In recent years, the mainland's capital market has gradually opened up, the capital system has been increasingly improved, and capital markets at all levels have been gradually established, enriching the investment and financing channels for enterprises. In this context, equity has become a favored investment method for capital. What is equity investment, how to make equity investment, and what industries and markets are there opportunities for equity investment?
In this book, the author uses simple and straightforward language and summarizes a set of equity investment methodology, combined with market hotspots and vivid cases, to introduce the essence and characteristics of equity investment, which covers from pre-investment market research, analysis, prediction, to investment operation skills, risk control and value realization, and then to post-investment management, etc., to help readers understand the regularity of equity investment more directly and deeply. Complexity and dynamics, develop the habit of thinking about problems with investment thinking, be responsible for yourself and your assets, and strive to achieve your goals in the field of equity investment.
Reconciling with Emotions
Douban score: 8.8
Emotions and physical sensations often help us understand ourselves. They contain the wisdom of biology and convey to us what is important to us and those around us. As you read Clinton's book, Reconciling with Emotions: An AEDP Therapy for Psychological Trauma, you will learn to appreciate the richness of emotions and their power to guide us to do what we need to do, heal past wounds, and live more productive and happier lives. Hillary does an excellent job of teaching emotions and the defense mechanisms behind them. In her case, she documents the cost of losing touch with their adaptive emotions, and the benefits and advantages that come when emotions are properly handled. The italicized letters in the book are key entry points that allow the reader to access different aspects of their own experiences that are relevant to the AEDP's research.
"It's Good to Have a Daughter"
Douban score: 8.8
Every girl goes through a long and complex process before she becomes an adult—not only her physical and mental growth, but also the process of knowing herself, becoming herself, and connecting with the people around her and the world. In the process, the girl is always looking for her voice: Who am I, what do I believe, what am I passionate about?
As a parent, in the process of raising a girl, you must not only give her love, learn to get along with her at different stages of growth, but also understand questions about her at different stages of growth:
- What stages of development did she go through from birth to the age of 19?
- At each stage of development, what physical, mental, and emotional manifestations are normal and what are not?
- When and how can you intervene in the abnormal presentation?
- How can I help her understand herself and become a better version of herself?
- How can she build a positive relationship with the outside world?
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"Beauty for Adults"
Douban score: 8.7
In view of the characteristics of narrative therapy, such as strong operability and remarkable effect, and high promotion value, Dr. Li Ming has been committed to the localization of narrative therapy in China since 2002, and this book is the culmination of his extensive introduction, scientific research and teaching work in the past 19 years. This book provides an in-depth description of narrative therapy from the perspective of narrative concepts, and compares narrative therapy with various schools of Western counseling techniques from the conceptual and technical levels, with the author's answers on related content. In addition, the book adds a lot of case material and dialogue discussions, which also makes it much more readable.
"It's okay to be lazy"
Douban score: 8.7
Do you always panic about the rapid passage of time? Do you always feel that you are the unluckiest, half a beat slower than everyone else? Do you feel that you are the only one who is busy like a madman every Monday, while everyone else is calmly and elegantly sipping oat milk or latte?
The fact that there is so much to do and too little time makes you dazed and mad. The only thing that is certain is that you can't do everything. You have to make trade-offs, and do them wisely, or you'll end up in a quagmire of regret for wasting precious time.
Time flies, leaving you far behind, and you are not the only unlucky person with this kind of sigh. Many people have this feeling: they wake up in the morning and it seems like it's dinner time before they have done anything - they haven't even had time to change their pajamas! and they feel very tired, like they have been hit by a truck, and every bone is crying out for exhaustion.
Are you nodding your head like me? Don't you know what to do with your hard-earned time? Suppose you have two full hours of time now, what do you decide to do with that time? Do you want to take a good break, or do housework? Do you want to catch up on a drama (self-care) or call your mom back? You think about it, hesitate, and before you know it, 45 minutes have passed, and you haven't done a thing yet!
The book "It's Okay to Be Lazy" introduces time management techniques that don't make you work like a machine or work as little as possible in a day, but rather how to maintain balance in your daily life, so that you have time to rest and do what makes you happy. In short, it's about always knowing exactly where you are, what you should do, and when. More importantly, this book will help you find time to do the things that really matter, that will allow you to find yourself again.
"Sit with Your Sorrows"
Douban score: 8.7
"Sit with Your Sorrows" is a heart-warming picture book that accompanies you through the emo moments of your life, bringing you intimate and inclusive companionship.
Here you'll find thoughtful and inclusive companionship, safe spaces that provide comfort, warm embraces full of empathy, and concrete and actionable advice. Reconcile with your emotions and heal your grief.
This book provides a rich and practical psychological healing toolbox, and provides you with some practical healing methods when you are facing grief and be your own psychologist.
"Her Workplace"
Douban score: 8.7
With the continuous development and progress of society, today's environment is no longer what it used to be. People should no longer judge women with the old eyes, and even women themselves should renew their concepts. As women, we also need to live our lives clearly:
- Identify talent strengths and positioning;
- not attached to anyone;
- Have a strong heart;
- Recognize the age cycle of the workplace and prepare for a rainy day;
- Lifelong learning, continuous self-improvement;
- know how to better protect yourself;
- Connecting with the female community and finding a sense of belonging;
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High Potential Talent
Douban score: 8.7
In recent years, the leadership echelon of many enterprises has seen the phenomenon of "lack of talents", which seriously restricts the sustainable development and transformation of enterprises. Based on nearly 20 years of talent management practice at Beijing Zhiding Management Consulting Co., Ltd., the authors of this book systematically discuss the definition of high-potential talents, the design, implementation and evaluation of high-potential talent programs, and propose highly operational tools and methods to help executives and human resources departments gain a deeper understanding of how to use high-potential talent programs to develop the next generation of leaders.
In this book, the author proposes:
The High Potential Talent Program is a strategic intervention to accelerate the growth of high potential talents, and it is a project that affects the future leadership development of the organization, which needs to be specially designed and carefully implemented by the organization;
Clarifying the criteria for high-potential talents is the premise for carrying out high-potential talent selection and training activities, and a clear selection process and effective assessment methods are conducive to the discovery of high-quality high-potential talents;
There are five common approaches to developing high potentials, namely classroom training, action learning, mentoring and coaching, developmental assignments and rotations, assessment feedback, and personal development programs, which organizations can integrate into a single learning journey to accelerate the growth of high potentials;
There are six key points in the implementation of the high-potential talent program, namely, winning the attention and involvement of senior management, ensuring that all parties are coordinated and closely cooperating, holding a good project kick-off meeting, mobilizing students' enthusiasm for learning, promoting learning transformation, and tracking and adjusting the process;
Evaluate the high-potential talent project to judge the value of its input and output, find out the problems in the process of project implementation, review and summarize in a timely manner, and correct and optimize the improvement.
Value Investing
Douban score: 8.7
One of the most important investment books of our time, comparable to Graham's "Securities Analysis".
Graham and Dodd's inheritors of value investing philosophy.
It is a must-read for all value investing disciples and is highly respected by many well-known fund managers and Wall Street investment bulls in the United States.
Value investing is a discipline that has historically proven to be profitable. Value investors can earn high returns regardless of market conditions. Bruce C.N. Greenwald is a well-educated scholar in the field of value investing, and his value investing courses and lectures at Columbia University are popular with elite Wall Street investors. He compiled and published what would have been a valuable course to make the book available.
"Grudge"
Douban score: 8.6
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a diagnosable mental illness. Patients with borderline personality disorder are mainly characterized by unstable interpersonal relationships, unstable emotions, unstable self-image, and apparent impulsivity, and when faced with emotional problems, they are prone to outbursts of anger or act without thinking, and even try to self-harm and suicide.
Starting from the discussion of the psychological and biological genetic roots of borderline personality disorder, this book expounds the characteristics of patients with borderline personality disorder, such as disordered self-identity, uncontrollable emotions, significant separation anxiety and conflicting intimate relationships, and on this basis, provides patients and their families with various treatments for borderline personality disorder, such as medication and psychotherapy. This book is not only a book to raise public awareness of this distressing mental disorder, but also a must-have manual for patients and their families.
"Happiness Heart"
Douban score: 8.6
Life is like sailing in a sea full of uncertainties, where the waves hit at some point and hit our boat hard, leaving us with inner stability, entangled in anxiety, doubt, worry and fear, and helpless.
In the face of life's challenges and dilemmas, how can we have the strong mental strength to maintain inner peace, clarity and transparency?
Meg Salter, author of "Happiness in Mindfulness: Living a Transparent Life in Mindfulness", has nearly 30 years of mindfulness practice experience and a deep background in coaching training. The easy-to-understand explanations and stories of mortal heroes will take you to understand how to gradually cultivate your mindfulness awareness in seemingly simple exercises, learn to accept emotions without judgment, look at changes with curiosity and learning, and finally turn into a butterfly when major challenges come, achieve personal transformation and growth, and then have the powerful power to change your life and reap the rewards of happiness.
The 25 mindfulness practices presented in the book "Mental Power: Living a Transparent Life with Mindfulness" do not require a specific belief or knowledge background, and can be practiced anytime, anywhere, even in the fast-paced city life – while walking the dog, in line, in conversation, or even while driving. In addition, this book is suitable for practitioners of all levels. If you're new to mindfulness or have tried it but given up, this book can help you get through the irritability, sleepiness, and discomfort of your beginner years. If you've been practicing mindfulness for a while but are stuck in a plateau and can't make the leap, this book can also help you break through the bottleneck and breathe new energy.
Disappearing Fathers, Anxious Mothers, and Runaway Kids
Douban score: 8.5
The book presents a vivid picture of family life with vivid language and skillful narration, presenting various major stages of family life, including love, marriage, childbirth, parenting, children living independently away from home, children returning home to live in sojourn, cheating, separation, divorce, remarriage, and so on. At the same time, the book also analyzes the influence of different types of relationships in the family (husband and wife, parents, siblings, in-laws, and children) on family members, and helps parents understand the reasons behind their children's behavior.
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