Psychologist Paul Stotzes has been named "one of the top 10 most influential thinkers in the world" for just one set of theories of reverse quotient and a book.
The book "Adverse Business" condenses his best insights in the field, showing how to survive, grow and rise in the face of adversity.
A person's ability to settle downhill determines his vision and the height of the uphill slope.
Feng Ding once said, "There is always adversity, and life is an attack." ”
As long as we are still making a living and advancing, the future will always be full of thorns and fog.
is not impatient and chaotic because of frustration, and becomes a camper who lies flat, but becomes a climber who lives on an iron horse, even if he is gray-headed, there is still light in his eyes.
The trough rebounds, PUBG, as long as we can bear the darkest and darkest days, we can usher in our highlight moment.
The essence of spiritual internal friction is the choice in times of adversity
I often hear people complaining that things are so hard that they can't do it.
But no one's life is simple, and no one is not helpless and persevering in the sword and shadow of life.
Just like the author mentioned an electric shock dog experiment in "Reverse Quotient":
When dogs that have been subjected to multiple shocks but cannot change their status, they will continue to lie down and endure the pain even if they have the opportunity to cancel the shock later.
And dogs that can turn off the shock by switching off at the beginning will still be the same in the later stages.
Dogs that gave up on changing the adverse event of electric shock showed "learned helplessness", a phenomenon that is also common among climbers who push the limit.
Just as the book tells the story of a group of climbers, the storm buried all the roads and revealed the fragile side of their hearts.
Surrounded by cowardice and despair, most climbers chose to give up and eventually lost their lives, but there was one climber, Withers, who always made his way through the storm and eventually waited for help.
In the face of Blizzard, some people chose to lie down, some people chose to move forward, and finally got a different ending.
The choices in adversity are different, and the adversity quotient is also different, just like the three types of people in the author's metaphor: climbers, campers, and abandoners.
It reminds me of Zuckerberg, who recently dropped out of the top 10 in the billionaire rankings, and he is the quintessential climber.
When he first showed his talent for computers, he knew how to develop programs to improve his father's work efficiency.
After enrolling at Harvard, he was supposed to graduate and enter a high-paying position, but he dropped out of school despite the opposition and co-founded an unheard of social networking site, Facebook.
The successive doubts and blows did not deter him, but made him sharpen a sharp blade in the long persistence, and once became the world's youngest 23-year-old billionaire.
Now he boldly plunged into the controversial metaverse wave, for which his net worth has shrunk by more than half, but he has no regrets.
It is uncertain what his future will be, but it is his bold and enterprising spirit that gives him the opportunity to do something at a young age and have great wealth at an early age.
I've seen such a sentence:
"Reverse quotient, which integrates IQ and EQ, determines how far you can go in this era of rapid development. ”
People walk in the thorny bushes of adversity all their lives, and adversity quotient is the boot under his feet.
When we wear boots that are as thin as cicada's wings, we are miserable, and we are cowardly and give up halfway.
When wearing boots as thick as bricks, the rugged road can't stop the high morale and hopeful pace.
The best way to get rid of anxiety is to stimulate positive energy in yourself
There is a saying, "To run away from adversity is to run away from life." ”
Optimistic people are those who live in adversity, arm themselves with swords and armor, and are always ready to fight.
Therefore, the author uses the theory of cognitive psychology to analyze that people with high adversity quotient will not fall into helplessness.
He gives the example of Eric, a man who became blind at the age of 13, who, instead of becoming hesitant and helpless after years of darkness, gladly accepted his misfortune.
He joined the wrestling team in high school, eventually became the captain, and then he began climbing again, eventually reaching the highest peak in North America.
Optimism makes his adversity quotient constantly improve, and the adversity quotient makes him positive and calm.
If a person has a high adversity quotient, he can exert his positive power and not fall into a decadent situation.
Just like in the book "The Meaning of Life", Frankl went from a glamorous and decent doctor to a lowly slave who was allowed to be a mermaid overnight, and he never gave up the light in his heart.
He became more and more frustrated in the midst of all kinds of torture, actively changed the status quo, and withdrew from the brink of mental breakdown many times.
Optimism and high adversity led him to finally get out of the terrible Auschwitz concentration camp.
Experiments with the New Theory of Health also show that:
Even the elderly with a high adversity quotient will have a more positive and sunny life and will live longer.
On the other hand, people with low adversity quotient cannot see problems from an optimistic perspective, and their lives have become the scene of disasters.
My friend Xiaolan is afraid of the negative impact of mistakes, and is used to evading responsibility, always jumping up to refute when others point out problems.
As a result, she became more and more in interpersonal and work difficulties, unable to make too many friends, and unable to do too difficult work.
Another friend is also always pessimistic, and likes to blame himself for the uncontrollable factor of everything.
Whenever someone pointed out her problem, she would always sigh and say, "Blame me for being too stupid to do anything." ”
But whether it is evasion or too much responsibility, it is a manifestation of the inability of people with low adversity quotient to control the negative impact and make life difficult.
There is a sentence in "Reverse Business" that says:
Adversity determines a person's ability and mentality to face difficulties in adversity, and an optimistic person is bound to come out of the shadows more easily than a pessimistic person.
Adverse quotient is closely related to optimism.
Optimistic people are always good at following the light in the shadows, finding gaps in the sword to escape, and giving full play to their strength.
An optimistic attitude despite adversity may be the real strength of a person.
Being strong in the midst of fragility is the best posture of life
Adversity tests not only ability, but also adversity, knowing how to actively adapt to adversity, is a kind of wisdom, but also a kind of wisdom.
Bill Wilson, one of the inventors of the "Twelve-Step Rehabilitation Method", fell into the illusory illusion of alcohol in his early years due to poverty and inactivity.
But when he was sent to the hospital for alcoholism many times, he suddenly woke up and no longer pinned the pain of life on alcohol, but faced the powerlessness of life.
By founding the Alcoholics Anonymous Mutual Aid Society, he successfully quit drinking and broke the difficulties of his life.
Anyone who can be sober in adversity is a person with a high quotient in adversity, and those who can break through the situation in adversity are brave people in life.
In the book, the author puts forward several suggestions on how to improve the adversity quotient and puncture the weak side of life:
1. Improve the adversity quotient through the LEAD tool
The LEAD tool is to make a change by listening to the response to adversity, exploring one's own responsibility for the outcome, and then analyzing the evidence to show that the assumption of low adversity quotient is correct.
The practice of establishing first and then breaking down makes people feel more pressured and puts it into practice as soon as possible.
There is a sentence in "Sun Tzu.Nine Lands" that says, "Fall into the place of death and then live, and put it in the place of death and survive." ”
Only by breaking the fear of adversity can we build up the fighting spirit against adversity.
If you don't break it, you can't start moving.
The higher a person's adversity quotient, the more they know how to think and break through the dilemma, based on the present, and change the present.
2. The funnel method improves the reverse quotient
The LEAD tool helps us make a list of actions, but there are so many to-dos that we can't get started.
According to the OKR Work Method, "Saying too much at once is the same as saying nothing." ”
It's easy to fall into the "busyness trap" of following everything on our list, only to get nothing but tiredness at the end of the day.
The author proposes the funnel method for this:
In the list of actions, select an action that needs to be implemented first, set a clear time and place for it, and form a clear and planned behavior to move forward.
In many cases, it is not idleness that hinders our growth, but busyness without knowing the purpose.
3. Establish positive goals to improve adversity quotient
In Mental Models, Joel Barker proposes that vision is a "dream in action", a positive vision that can help us break out of the cycle of despair.
The author believes that only by weaving dreams and making dreams a vision can we have the motivation to persist in pursuing our vision.
The vision entrusted with the dream is like a lighthouse in the middle of the night, even if you have been disappointed and deviate from the course, you can eventually reach the other side of the yearning.
There is a sentence in "Caigen Tan", "The machine of heaven is unpredictable, and it stretches and stretches, all of which are sowing heroes and reversing heroes." ”
Whether it is a trough or a peak, it is a game of life.
If you don't give up at the trough and don't feel complacent at the peak, you can have peace and calm wisdom to break the game.
Only by coping with changeable adversity with a rising adversity quotient can we open up a new path when there is no way out.
Write at the end
The famous theory of biological evolution comes from a travel experience: a flock of finches of the same species, but with different beaks.
The thin beak is used to penetrate deep into the trunk of the tree and peck at insects, the thick beak is used to devour and pry open nuts, and the slightly curved beak is used to reach into the stamen and taste the nectar.
Sparrows know how to evolve and survive in isolated islands, and people should also learn to iterate and grow in the face of adversity.
I read a saying, "All adversity is actually an opportunity for the soul to grow." ”
In the face of adversity, we should not be cowardly, but try and break the situation, so as to take root firmly.
In the face of failure, do not excuse, but reflect and improve, in order to grow upward.
Firmly rooted in difficulties and blooming new flowers is the inspiration that every adversity gives us to grow.