When people are old, they always want to be kind to their children and let them care more about themselves. However, no matter how capable the children are, they cannot meet all the requirements of the elderly. Especially materially, after all, the ability of children to provide is limited. If the elderly make too high demands, not only will they not be able to meet them, but they can also strain the relationship between the two parties.
Therefore, the elderly still need to learn to be tolerant and content. In particular, there are three things that should not be asked of children:
First, don't ask your children to provide for them too luxuriously.
Many elderly people think that when their children earn money, they should provide more for themselves. Buy designer clothes, go on vacation abroad, drive a luxury car, and live in a high-end apartment...... These things are not necessities of life. If the conditions of the children are average, the old man puts forward these extravagant requirements, which will inevitably make people embarrassed.
In fact, it is enough to be well fed and warmly dressed. Children have no problem giving themselves the basic livelihood, which is the greatest care and respect. If you have to provide extravagantly, it will only make your children complain a lot, and over time the relationship will be estranged.
Second, don't ask your children to support themselves unconditionally.
Nowadays, there is a lot of pressure in society, and children also have to face their own lives and careers. If the elderly ignore the actual situation of their children and ask for unconditional support, it will also be a burden to their children.
For example, the son has just been married and has limited financial conditions. At this time, if the parents-in-law want them to bear all the living expenses of the elderly, it is really too much burden for them. This not only brings difficulties to the life and development of young people, but also makes them very aggrieved in their hearts, and their feelings for the elderly will naturally fade.
Therefore, the elderly should still be tolerant and understand the practical difficulties of their children. It is good to let them care for them within their means, and not to make demands that make their children feel embarrassed.
Third, don't ask your children to keep all their property for themselves.
Many elderly people hope that the money their children earn, the houses they buy, and the wealth they accumulate will eventually be kept to themselves. But it's a bit of a self-serving idea.
First of all, what children earn by their own hard work should be left to their descendants. Secondly, the children are now able to provide for the elderly. Finally, excessively high inheritance requirements can also easily lead to family conflicts.
Therefore, the elderly should learn to be open-minded. There is no problem for children to support themselves now, which is the greatest filial piety. Inheritance is not really important, and it should not be the standard for judging parent-child relationships.
It's easy to understand that people want more care from their children when they get older. However, excessive requirements and unreasonable dependence often fail to achieve the desired results, and can also make children complain.
Therefore, the elderly still need to learn to be tolerant and understanding, and adjust their mentality and expectations. No matter how good your children's conditions may be, they should not be asked of them beyond their means. Otherwise, it will only backfire, reduce the filial piety of children, and make there is no happiness in old age.
Family affection is the most precious emotion in the world, and it requires us to care for and manage it with our hearts. When we get older, we should be more rational in our relationship with our children and avoid making excessive demands on them. Remember, affection is not a transaction, let alone an endless taking. May we all cherish the relationship with our children and maintain this precious family relationship with understanding and tolerance. #Life Philosophy##每日一 Enlightenment#