01
I have seen a very sensational story: a bird, flying through a beautiful body of water, met a fish floating on the water.
In a moment when their eyes intertwined, they found that they loved each other for a thousand years.
The birds hovered, unwilling to leave, and the fish did not want to sink to the bottom for a long time. Cold comes and goes, and the seasons alternate, and they keep watch...... However, animals from different worlds can't stay together for a long time.
Eventually, the bird flew away in tears, and the fish dived to the bottom. It's just that the birds don't know that the tears of the fish are in the water and can't be seen.
They never returned to the waters, and none of them wanted to touch the sadness in their hearts.
Singer Zhuang Xinyan sang: "Some people scatter when they walk, and some things fade when they look at them." ”
There are too many people in life, and if they all have to be stored in life, one day, life will be unbearable. Therefore, when we reach a certain age, we have to learn to "throw as we go".
In the Internet era, it is easy to meet a person, but it is also possible to lose a person. As long as you move your fingers and delete the other party, you will disappear into the vast sea of people.
Therefore, it is not difficult to find that there are always some people who quietly leave the group of classmates and relatives, if not to make a living, even the work group, they don't want it anymore.
02
First, people with a high level need to get out of the low-level "group".
On Zhihu, netizen "Wumi" said that the high school he attended was the best in the local area. At that time, the whole class was very sunny.
For a while, a few classmates in big cities took pictures of other people's lives, the chaos of the city, etc., and sent them to the group of classmates, and they did not cover other people's faces, which seemed to be of very low quality.
He suddenly felt that after decades of education, everyone was in their twenties and thirties, and they should be able to distinguish between right and wrong. However, there were still low-level things in the group of classmates, and in an instant, he withdrew from the group.
Originally, there was no difference between the levels, but when they entered the society, money, status, and cognition changed, so there were 369 and so on. If you insist on going to the higher places, you will naturally get out of the lower places.
The ancients said, "The bird knows the ambition of the bird." ”
Really high-level people are often "high and low", so he will quietly withdraw from the group of classmates and relatives and join the high-level group. If you don't come across the right group, stick to walking alone. You can't be dragged back by the people around you.
03
Second, people who have been hurt by love are unwilling to return to the place where they are sad.
Xiao Zhou, a childhood playmate, said such a thing: he was born in a small ravine and has more than 20 cousins and sisters. In order to facilitate contact, everyone set up a group, and chatted about the recent situation in the group during the New Year's holidays and agreed on the day of the party.
When Xiao Zhou was a child, his family was very poor. In the first semester, my family couldn't even afford to pay the tuition. The parents went to a relative's house to borrow money, and all the relatives refused in unison.
Originally, the past cannot be remembered all the time. But a relative was in the group, and a sentence suddenly popped up: "Xiao Zhou, if you don't have the money to go home, I'll lend you a little." ”
"An unintentional word, offending someone with a heart", mentioning the matter of borrowing money, made Xiao Zhou very angry and decisively quit the group.
There are always some people, "which pot is not opened", and pinch other people's scars. Because classmates and relatives know each other well, some injuries can be turned over at any time and give people a hard blow.
With the development of society, we have finally left the "poverty", we should live happily, how can we make ourselves uncomfortable because of a group?
Whether it's a classmate or a relative, once it hurts you, it's easy to break off friendship. Nowadays, as long as you are not lazy, you can rely on your small family and live a prosperous life, and your dependence on relatives and classmates is getting smaller and smaller.
04
Third, insist on being your own person, and don't want to agree with "people who don't like it".
I like this point very much: "I leave the group, not because the 'group' is bad, but because I don't want to see the people in the group." ”
There is a saying that a grain of rat feces can ruin a pot of porridge.
If there is a person in the group who is very unpopular, then you will consciously stay away from the group.
For example, in the group of classmates, there is a classmate who is the boss and shows off his wealth every day, posting pictures of drinking high-end wine today, showing luxury cars tomorrow, and some classmates who tend to be inflammatory, applauding him vigorously. The group of classmates has become a stage for a few people to show themselves.
There is also a situation where someone in the group has a-for-tat confrontation with you, or has had a holiday. When you see what he says, you get angry. It's better to withdraw from the group and make your ears clean.
05
Fourth, those who move forward silently bid farewell to the "once" quietly.
There is such a line in "Fallen Angel": "On August 25, 1995, I met my first love. She seems to have forgotten about me, maybe I've become too handsome. ”
People, always have to say goodbye to the past in a chic way, although there are too many reluctances, there is always a place that touches the heart, but indulged in the past, you will lose yourself. Therefore, smart people are always quiet and far-reaching, and say goodbye to everything in the past.
At first, I wanted to find some memories in the group, but the more memories I found, the more uncomfortable I became. It is better to bravely leave the "past" and move towards the future.
A lot of emotions, sooner or later you have to say goodbye, it's better to be earlier, you don't have to drag the mud and water.
Once upon a time, after Marie Curie received medals and trophies, she gave them to the children. Then he said, "Let the child know that honor is like a toy, and it must not be taken too seriously, otherwise nothing will be achieved." ”
It is wise to let go of the past and start the next phase of work immediately.
06
There are also some people, because they don't want to associate with someone anymore, and they are afraid of being found, so they deliberately hide themselves.
No contact, no interruption, all emotions, naturally, fade. I chatted a few words in the morning, but I couldn't find anyone in the afternoon, which was a little surprising, but it was also excusable, so I didn't have to ask.
In fact, it's not that people don't have groups, they just aren't in your group, and they don't fit in, they just don't want to be in the "old group".
07
Of course, a person is free to fit in with the group, and he cannot blindly follow the trend and pretend to be high. If you deliberately withdraw from the group to show anyone, you will be "embarrassed by yourself".
When a person matures, he no longer likes to be lively, nor does he show off or compare anything. It doesn't matter whether there is a group or not, the most important thing is to work hard, be yourself, and have a home to go back to.
Once, we met and embraced each other, and later, passion was replaced by strangeness, and human affection was impregnated with interests.
It is said that it will not be forgotten in a lifetime, but in fact, it is forgotten in the rivers and lakes.