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My husband Li Chunbo and I have been married for 12 years. In the past 12 years, we have been living happily ever after. My husband works as a vice president of a foreign company and earns a lot of money. I am a full-time housewife, and my daily job is to take care of my 8-year-old son Xiaobao and take care of some household chores. Our family of three lives in a high-end residential area in the city, and we have a worry-free life.
After school that day, I drove to the elementary school as usual to pick up Xiaobao from school. My mother and son went to a nearby supermarket to buy groceries and prepare to cook a good meal at home. As we approached our door, I suddenly saw an unfamiliar white sedan parked in front of our house. A tall and beautiful young woman stepped down, she opened the back seat door, and a little girl about 10 years old jumped out of the car happily. Just then, I saw my husband also get out of the car. He was laughing and talking to the woman. I was stunned, vaguely feeling that things were not so simple.
I looked at my husband in disbelief: "Who are they, and why are you with them?"
My husband's smile stiffened, and he didn't know how to answer. I stared at my husband and insisted on an explanation.
I took a deep breath and tried to stay calm. Our family of three sat awkwardly in the living room with the mother and daughter. I looked at my husband and waited for his explanation.
My husband was apologetic and wanted to hug me and comfort me, but I pushed him away: "Don't touch me! You big liar! I don't believe anything you say anymore!"
I tugged at my hair in pain, and a strong sense of despair overwhelmed me. "Why? Why are you hurting me like this? What am I doing wrong?" I cried and asked my husband.
I burst into tears, and my heart was like a knife. I can't believe that my 12 years of married life are fake!
I wandered the streets like a soulless walking corpse. I was unaware of the strange stares of the passers-by, and my mind was full of lies and betrayals from my husband. I think back to the bits and pieces we have had in the past 12 years, and my heart is like a knife. I gave him my most sincere love and wholehearted care, but I didn't expect him to abandon and hurt me like this!
I don't know how long I've been wandering, and by the time I finally looked up to see my surroundings, it was already dark. I had gone far and was on the other side of the city. The surroundings were desolate, with only a few street lamps gleaming in the night.
I can consider continuing to do so and keep this marriage. My husband has a successful career and a good income, and I can continue to live a worry-free life; And if the husband has another family himself, there will be no risk of cheating. This "symbiosis of well-defined interests" is actually the best state for everyone.
The husband was ecstatic and said yes again and again. So, this is the state of life that we came to a consensus later.
Now, a year later, we are still living in familiar neighborhoods and houses, retaining the superficial relationship as husband and wife. I will get a compensation fee from my husband every month, which allows me to have no worries and concentrate on taking care of Xiaobao. Occasionally, I would run into Xiaofang's mother and daughter in social situations, and both would ignore each other and behave politely.
My husband and I felt like a shrewd memorandum of understanding. This document clearly delineates the scope of our respective powers, obligations and distribution of benefits. My husband still works hard, and I teach my husband and children, and we have lost love between us, and we are more like business partners. And between me and Xiaofang, a silent symbiosis of interests has also been formed.
This state seems to be the best arrangement I can think of in this situation. Even though emotionally I can't fully accept what my husband is doing, from a rational point of view, this is exactly the typical example of "take what you need, why not". I accepted the reality when I saw it.
Every time I think about it, I smile at a good price. Life needs reality and reason everywhere, and I didn't indulge myself in the quagmire of pain after all, this is my story. I often laugh at myself that this shrewd trading relationship between me and my husband is as clear as a business contract signed by a company. We are strangers to each other, but I am Xi to this rhythm of life.
I try to avoid touching my husband because it reminds me of the past. Occasionally, we met in the hallway or living room, and we quickly parted after just a few pleasantries. I concentrate on my work as a housewife and try to devote more time and energy to Xiaobao. I don't want my mother and son to be affected by this failed marriage.
As Xiaobao grew up, I tried my best to hide it from his husband's other family. But just last month, the neighbor's aunt accidentally leaked her mouth, and Xiaobao learned that she also had a half-sister.
Xiaobao, who came home from school that day, looked very depressed, and the corners of his mouth were smiling downward. I whispered to him, "Baby, what's wrong, did anything unhappy happen at school today?"
Xiaobao was very disappointed after hearing this. I hugged him and comforted him softly, but Xiaobao still cried after all. He choked up and said, "I don't want that dad anymore! Dad is a big liar, why would he hurt my aunt like this!?"
Since then, Xiaobao's address to her husband has been changed to "Uncle Li". I know that Xiaobao is estranged from her husband, and he can't accept this irresponsible father anymore. I didn't stop Xiaobao from calling it that, because I felt that my husband was really sorry for Xiaobao.
One day, my husband came to talk to me, and his tone was a little excited: "Why did Xiaobao suddenly change his name to Uncle Li?
I said calmly, "Yes, the child already knows the truth." You should also understand that what you have done has seriously broken your trust in Xiaobao, and it is normal for the father-son relationship between you to break down. ”
"But I have been fulfilling my father's responsibilities and obligations! Every month, you have enough living expenses, and Xiaobao will meet him with whatever he needs!" My husband said anxiously.
I coldly retorted: "The so-called 'father' is not limited to material support. You hurt him mentally far more than anything else. You need to reflect on yourself. ”
After hearing this, my husband left in a very bad mood. I know he's conflicted, but I can't speak for him. This is all the result of his own work.
Xiaobao and I live in this villa for our lives, our lives are fine, everything seems to be the same as before. I put more effort into Xiaobao's upbringing, trying to let him grow up healthy and happy in a good environment. Xiaobao's appearance is the only solace in my life.
Days like this go by so plainly. A year later, my husband finally couldn't help but move out of the house, and I guess he probably couldn't stand Xiaobao's alienation from him. Before leaving, my husband sent me a sum of money as compensation. His eyes were sad and complicated, and I knew he wasn't feeling good either. But I'm numb and don't feel much.
As soon as my husband left, I felt that the whole house was a lot empty. Xiaobao and I live like this. The neighbors in the community know our story, and some will cast sympathetic glances; But I'm Xi to turning a blind eye to that. I tried to make myself forget the unbearable things in the past and devote myself wholeheartedly to taking care of Xiaobao.
All my expectations are on Xiaobao. Watching him grow day by day is my only consolation. Xiaobao inherited her husband's intelligent nature, and her grades in Xi were very good. I often cook food for him myself and accompany him to the playground and the cinema. I hope that Xiaobao's childhood can be as happy and carefree as possible, and not be poisoned by our parents' discordant marriage.
On the first day of school, my husband showed up on time and stood at the freshman registration desk with us to chat. He behaved very enthusiastically and abnormally, constantly squeezing his eyebrows at Xiaobao. But I was sensitive to the fact that Xiaobao always kept a polite distance from her husband, and her eyes did not linger in the slightest. I knew the gap couldn't be repaired.
After the ceremony, I offered to invite the old public to lunch. My husband readily agreed. The three of them sat down in the campus cafeteria and ordered a few side dishes. The husband intentionally or unintentionally wanted to talk to Xiaobao about his future plans, but Xiaobao just fiddled with his mobile phone and said a few perfunctory words absentmindedly. I can see that my husband is a little embarrassed, and it is not good to get to the bottom of it.
After eating, my husband pulled his suitcase and hesitated to send Xiaobao to the dormitory. I couldn't help but exclaim: "There is too much luggage, Xiaobao can't carry it alone." You don't want to send it, let's just take a taxi back. A hint of loss flashed on my husband's face, but he could only give up. Xiaobao was still expressionless, watching her husband leave. I sighed and thought to myself that the atmosphere of this Cold War was too difficult to bear.
In this way, Xiaobao began his college life. He plunged headlong into Xi and club activities, and never said anything about his husband. I know he still has that thorn in his heart, but there's nothing I can do.
In the blink of an eye, Xiaobao's freshman winter vacation arrived, and her husband once again offered to come and see him. I guess he probably wanted to take the opportunity to give Xiaobao a New Year's gift. I didn't refuse, I just sighed in my heart.
That day, my husband arrived as promised, with an excited and expectant smile on his face, and a few large bags of gifts in his hand. I asked him to sit down in the living room, and Xiaobao slouched out.
I could see that my husband was attentive, but Xiaobao was expressionless, and his eyes were as cold as ice: "No need, I don't lack these things." You can take them to your other daughter. ”
"I'm not unusual!" Xiaobao suddenly raised his voice, his face angry.
My husband and I were stunned. My husband's face was pale, clutching his chest and panting, as if he had been greatly stimulated.
After a while, my husband finally got up and left, his eyes empty and numb. He didn't say a word, just walked away in silence. I had mixed feelings in my heart, angry and distressed. Xiaobao's temper is also fierce. Since then, my husband and I have not been in touch. I don't know how my husband is doing, so I guess I went back to concentrate on my husband and children. I didn't pay attention to it and continued to be busy taking care of Xiaobao for four years of college.
Xiaobao is a smart and well-behaved good boy, and I believe that he will be able to graduate smoothly and find his dream job. Sure enough, on the eve of graduating from university, Xiaobao happily told me that he had received the company of his choice and successfully passed all the interview levels.
I was so proud of him that my eyes were red with joy. Xiaobao came over and hugged me, and said softly, "Mom, you've worked hard all these years." I'm an adult, and I'll take good care of you in the future. ”
My heart swelled with warmth and emotion, and I gently patted Xiaobao's back. I understand that my life's work has not been in vain. I have supported this house alone for so many years, and I finally waited for this moment to reap and reward.
Xiaobao will soon go to work in the city. The day before leaving, he suddenly asked me, "Mom, I want to visit Uncle Li and tell him the good news of my work, is it okay?"
I was a little surprised, but I still nodded hurriedly: "Of course it's no problem, as long as you want to go, you can go!"
I couldn't help but blush, and nodded vigorously. I know that Xiaobao has really grown up and can already be on his own. He will be a great man, and I am very proud and happy for him.
Xiaobao stayed at her husband's house for two days and came back. I couldn't wait to ask him about the trip, but Xiaobao said he didn't plan to tell me. But from his tone and expression, I can feel that the estrangement between their father and son seems to have been eliminated somewhat, at least Xiaobao is not so aggressive towards her husband anymore.
I smiled with relief, people always need to learn to be tolerant and forgiving. Xiaobao successfully passed this hurdle, and I am happy for him.
In this way, while Xiaobao continued to be promoted and raised, I was also getting old, and my physical strength and energy were not as good as before. Sometimes I sit by the window in a daze, watching the children downstairs playing, and I can't help but think of the bits and pieces of Xiaobao's childhood. Now my hair is gray, wrinkles are crawling all over my cheeks, and my gait is starting to be unsteady. Fortunately, the government's pension insurance can ensure my basic life, and with the financial support that Xiaobao remits from time to time, I can still get by in my twilight years.
Time passed in a hurry, and in the blink of an eye I was 70 years old. And Xiaobao has gradually been reused in his company, starting from a grassroots employee, and now he is now a small manager of the department.
I still remember a few years ago, Xiaobao asked me to eat at a fancy restaurant in the city and introduced me to his new girlfriend. The girl's name is Li Nan, she is a local, two years younger than Xiaobao, with a sweet appearance and a gentle and considerate personality. I could tell at a glance that Xiaobao liked her very much. Sure enough, just two weeks later, Xiaobao happily announced the good news of marrying Li Nan.
I was ecstatic and hurriedly packed my bags for Xiaobao and prepared to go back to the city to help organize the wedding. God knows, I haven't been happier in years. My baby son is about to start a family and have his own new love and new room, and my eyes are red with excitement.
But I quickly put the matter behind me, as the images of flowers and candles and sweet couples stung my eyes slightly. I am truly happy and proud of Xiaobao, God has finally favored my son.
After I got married, I stayed in the city to help the young couple take care of the family and live a life with them. Li Nan is very filial to me, and always tells Xiaobao to care more about me, an old man, and I see it warm in my eyes. I strongly feel that there is indeed sincerity in the world, and the future of the couple will be very happy.
I messaged my husband a few times, asking if it was inconvenient for him to come to the city to see his grandson. But every time my husband is perfunctory, I remember that he has another family, so I can't force it anymore.
I put all my heart and soul into helping the young couple take care of their newborn child. Fortunately, I have a lot of parenting experience and take good care of this chubby little guy. Xiaobao and my father-in-law and mother-in-law also respect me and answer all questions and don't let me worry about anything. I feel that this old lady is also a good old woman, and I feel happy and satisfied with myself.
However, at this time, my husband's obituary was suddenly delivered to me. It turned out that my husband died of a heart attack at the age of 63. The obituary said that a farewell ceremony would be held for him in his hometown. I was a little caught off guard, I haven't heard from my wife for more than ten years, but I didn't expect the last meeting to be such an occasion. I have mixed feelings in my heart, and I really can't express the complicated feelings of the moment in words.
Xiaobao comforted my husband that there would be a better place to go in the future, and I could only smile bitterly. The most difficult relationship in the world is afraid that it is the fetters of this marriage. We are husband and wife, but we have lived apart for so many years. Although my husband owes me something, after all, I have a big and small treasure, and this relationship is still difficult to erase.
I quickly left the mourning hall because there was really nothing to say. After sitting in front of the urn for a while, I turned away and put an end to the messy marriage.