What does Fu Seoul's divorce from Lao Liu illustrate? "Stay-at-home husbands" are difficult to be respected

Fu Seoul and Lao Liu divorced in the show, so that the variety show earned enough traffic, but it is still a soap opera in life, although it cannot be said to be a bad drama, but it is also a plot that many people like me don't like to watch at all. Even so, we can still learn enough "lessons" from this incident, one of which is that men should be "full-time husbands/stay-at-home fathers" because society is too unacceptable to be respected.

Fu Seoul and Lao Liu have experienced "poor couples mourning" and can be regarded as couples in distress. After Fu Seoul rose to prominence through "Strange Words", Lao Liu began a career as a complete "full-time husband" and the source of Fu Seoul's jokes. In terms of the heights that an individual can reach, Fu Seoul is definitely a strong woman, a successful person who uses knowledge and eloquence to walk on a unique track, which is beyond doubt.

After Lao Liu returned to the back of the family to become a full-time husband, the good stories about marriage between the two have long existed on the Internet. Every time he participated in the show, Fu Seoul would almost talk about how good Lao Liu was to himself. Fu Seoul and Lao Liu had previously divorced once, and later, the two remarried because Fu Seoul, who was on the rise of his career, had a mess of work and life after the divorce. Fu Seoul has also publicly described the marriage as "the best marriage I have ever met." If this is the case, why should we come to that step again?

Because the status and relationship between the two people are no longer what they used to be. The "shift of time" that the ancients said must also exist in marriage relationships, and the "economic ability determines family status" that people today lament is actually the truth.

When Lao Liu had advanced in the life of her full-time husband to Fu Seoul and kicked himself "knew it was time to pour water", Fu Seoul obviously had a garbage can next to him but let Lao Liu throw garbage, they could no longer "go back". Regarding the happiness of marriage, only feelings remain. "I can guarantee that my husband is very happy to be a full-time father, and I can make money to support the family," Fu Seoul said, and Liu was experiencing the biggest entanglement time. This shows that Fu Seoul no longer knows her husband. And Lao Liu also lost himself in the misreading and became a symbol. Although he said that he did not mind being used as a joke and ridiculed by Fu Seoul on the show, the subtext I realized was: the premise is that you have to respect me.

However, what did Fu Seoul say? She said: Why does a person keep making salted fish, do you know? Because he is suitable for salted fish, once the belief of not seeking advancement is formed, he even breathes slower than others, you don't want to spur, because there is no harm without expectation. Of course, there is an element of "program needs" in this statement, but too many details have already shown that Fu Seoul is becoming more and more intolerant of Lao Liu's "not seeking progress", and she may not even realize that she has regarded Lao Liu as a salted fish under Stephen Chow's words.

A blogger wrote: Lao Liu was forced to struggle by Fu Seoul, which full-time wife has experienced it? Lao Liu became Fu Seoul joke material, which full-time wife has experienced? Lao Liu needs to report to Fu Seoul, how many full-time wives have experienced?

This is indeed not true, for example, some jokers will also "cut" their wives, but overall, Lao Liu's experience is indeed the real experience of "full-time husbands".

Many years ago, an old acquaintance quit his job to become a full-time "housewife" because he had to take care of his children. Although he talked about the pleasure of having a lot of free time when he was drinking with us, in his bones, he became more and more unbearable to see his wife's face even for pocket money and clothes. This is the same thing as the case where Lao Liu wanted to buy clothes he liked but was stifled because Fu Seoul didn't like it.

All the startling details do not appear out of thin air and point to nothing. To put it bluntly, whether it is Lao Liu or some "housekeepers", they have lost the respect of their wives and have become a normal state of life. It is hard to imagine how long such days of incomprehension and respect can last.

Lao Liu's complaining was not understood by some people, thinking that this was hypocritical and idle. But if you want to switch the status - husbands have all kinds of dislikes and restrictions on full-time wives, then many people still don't fry the pot? In addition, if the full-time wife complains that she is stressed and is often sympathetic, but you see, after Lao Liu's bitterness is shown, many people are accusing him of being in the blessing and not knowing the blessing, and does not know how to understand Fu Seoul, who is working hard outside. What a double standard.

The difference between a full-time wife and a full-time husband exists objectively. Simply put, stay-at-home wives are more tolerated, while stay-at-home husbands are less tolerated. This nature has gone beyond the scope of a family. The pressure faced by that old acquaintance was not only on his wife's side, but also stemmed from the strange gazes of those around him. Some netizens have also mentioned various bitterness when commenting on the divorce of Fu Seoul and Lao Liu, for example, no matter how you explain what kind of "force majeure" is of being a full-time husband, you may still be regarded as "eating soft rice". Have women ever been despised as "soft rice"?

While traditional social concepts have portrayed men as "breadwinners and bearers of family responsibilities", in the eyes of some, men's return to the family is unforgivable. This proves that men actually lack the public opinion environment to become full-time husbands. If you do it accidentally, it has to change. A man I know, after being unemployed for many days and relying on his wife to support his family, started a casual job, did not earn much, and was still not valued by his wife, but at least he could "straighten his waist" in front of his neighbors.

It is said that marriage is based on love, why is marriage not based on respect? First, if a man really needs to be a full-time husband, the prerequisite must be to be respected by his family and society. Since it is a job for a woman to be a full-time wife, it is certainly a job for a man to be a full-time husband. He should not be labeled as "eating soft rice" and "being given alms". Second, since the concept that men cannot eat soft rice is still solidified, a man must think clearly about whether his choice is appropriate, whether he can withstand the pressure caused by this in the future, and whether there is a better option than being a full-time husband? The reality is cruel, when the subtlety and even contradictions of the husband and wife relationship are slowly highlighted because of their "full-time" choice, can they calmly bear the consequences of unhappiness or even chicken feathers?

•(This article is only the author's personal views and does not represent the position of this newspaper)

Wu Li Chuan

Responsible editor: Chen Bin