Secrets that cannot be said

Do not look back, tears but flow, the world outside the iron gate is wonderful, I can't take away the tear marks you wiped and wiped, you and I both know that this other fate is also exhausted, I carry this hollow heart to remember, commemoration, how long will it take?? Go home! Four years of anticipation! The old age of the parents, the messiness of the family, the non-talking, the heartache, but also the strength. I have never been a happy person, I have not lived a real life, four years later, I still have to face those disguised concerns, those contemptuous eyes, false smiles, clearly naked hanging on the face, Oh, feel free! Looking at myself in the mirror, the skin is bad, the face is full of fine lines, the back is not straight, I am not used to using chopsticks, can not wear high heels, can not eat greasy food, do not know how to use the mobile phone, do not know what kind of clothes to wear, do not know that there is a dog named Xiao bai at home, the flowers are dead, the fish is gone, everywhere is greasy, dirt full of furniture, items, and drugs everywhere, I said to myself, see? Want to fan yourself! Thirty-six years have always lived selfishly, except for your parents, you are already a tainted person in the eyes of others, and you can never lift your head! In these four years, living in the interpersonal environment at the bottom of society, unheard things, unseen people, all suffering, suffering sins, even if it comes out, your heart cannot go out in this life. From the moment I came out, I spent the money in my mother's mobile phone toothlessly, and my mother said,, if you want to buy anything, you can buy it well! When I came back, my father was still wearing old clothes, furniture, and knick-knacks from a long time ago, and my father said that if you were ok, you would save some money without a word of complaint. Home is still warm, for the first time in four years, sleep steadily, do not wake up in a dream, the ears listen to unknown songs, the past is vivid, a paragraph jumps out of the mind, the heart sinks little by little, knowing that this road is not easy, but the tears fall so easily!