Wen | Reiko Feifei
01.
Another pair of stars officially announced their divorce.
World supermodel Gisele Bundchen and top rugby player Tom Brady have been married for thirteen years and have three children.
Husband Brady returned to the family after retiring despite his promise before marriage, and returned to the competition less than a few months after announcing his retirement this year, disappointing Bundchen, who returned to the family alone with a baby, and the two ended in divorce.
It is said that supermodel Giselle can earn $450,000 on one runway. She is worth hundreds of millions. She is not short of money, and it is difficult for her to raise a baby.
A lot of money cannot solve the problem of "widowhood parenting".
With three children alone, although there are many nannies and infinite care for the children, Bangchen does it himself, and no matter how much he pays for the children, he feels that it is not enough.
Mother's love is like water, and father's love is like a mountain. It is often said that the warmest is the mother's embrace, and the most solid is the father's shoulders.
In the process of raising children, the nourishment of fatherly love and maternal love is irreplaceable and cannot replace each other.
Brady's absence of love for his children as a father is unforgivable for his wife and children.
Tu Lei said: As a man, there are two things to learn. One is called men's responsibilities, and the other is called men's skills. What do you think is the responsibility? You think that the responsibility is to stay together for life, throw a few dollars at home, and the real responsibility is to care about every minute and second of your loved ones.
Bangchen is not rare for Brady's money, and for her, Brady's thoughtfulness and companionship are particularly precious.
In terms of money, the husband and wife are evenly matched, but emotional inequality is the culprit of divorce.
"Widowed parenting" is a nightmare for many mothers.
02.
Fu Seoul said: A child really can't do anything, but he can make you can't do anything.
For Bangchen, who has a lot of money, her situation is obviously several times superior to most mothers. In reality, mothers have to grasp work with one hand and carry the baby with the other, and in the end, you will find that the baby is not brought well, the money is not earned, and the body and mind are exhausted.
I once tried to work while raising a baby, when he was about three years old. When I put my toys, food, and drink on one side of my child, I went to the other side and got ready to focus on my work.
In less than a minute, the child calls "mother" one by one, either for you to hold or for you to accompany you, one moment the toy is broken, the other time the food and drink are overturned, and on the other end of the computer, the boss and colleagues are still waiting for you to reply.
In fact, it's true that there is a baby who can't do anything, but it's also true that you can't do anything.
At that time, you really wished that someone could help you. Where is the husband? Why should I have to work and raise babies, while he only has to work?
There is only one reason for work: lack of money.
Your endless efforts, in the eyes of the world, you are not doing a good job, you cannot wholeheartedly take care of the family and take care of the children; Unable to focus and develop your career outside.
You subsidize the family, you take care of the children, coming, and provoking a "no". Not yet.
Men and women who make money at the same time, in the workplace, men are traditionally and secularly known as "focusing on careers", and can be promoted and raised; The woman is said to be divided into taking care of her family, and she is left out and marginalized by the workplace.
See, this is the so-called "male reward" and "motherhood punishment".
The trouble of working mothers is "two minds": while serving the boss with trembling, carefully making money and increasing family income; While raising the spirit to take care of the children.
An American professor did a survey of working mothers and asked one of the women, why do you "fight" so much?
Because "other mothers" are like that, she said.
The professor asked again: Can you give an example?
She thought for a long time and couldn't find an example. The so-called "other mothers" are nothing more than an illusion that does not exist.
Actress Reiza, who just won the Feitian Award, was breastfeeding when she filmed "Mountain and Sea Love", and she played the role, not delaying the work progress of the crew, while insisting on breastfeeding the child between her own intervals, and milking it to the nanny to feed the child when she could not feed it herself.
During that time, she had a very difficult time, once the milk was swollen and her breasts became inflamed, and the conditions at that time were limited and she endured letting the doctor suck the fluid without anesthesia.
Netizens who have had the same experience saw and said: This kind of pain is only known by those who experience it, and it already hurts endlessly in the case of anesthesia, not to mention the pain when there is no anesthesia.
After winning the award, Reiza choked up on the podium and said thank you to the organizing committee and the director, and the third person to thank was the sister-in-law.
It was noticed that Reiza's husband was not seen during the whole process. The sadness of working mothers "widowed parenting" can be seen.
03.
Remember the case of the 29-year-old mother who committed suicide by jumping off the building with a pair of children?
This is a real case that happened in Anhui in 2021.
After Bao's mother married the man, she was prompted, forced to choose to resign, gave birth to the first child is a daughter, the mother-in-law learned that it was a daughter, and there were some disabilities, so she did not take the child, Bao's mother began to take the child before the confinement, and finally the child's mother's help, Bao's mother successfully made the confinement.
The husband has been absent.
Under long-term physical and mental pressure, Bao's mother was in a trance, and finally took her two children to a desperate road.
Remember the documentary "Shengmen", women gambled their lives to give birth, and after giving birth, they needed help and looked at their faces.
At the most vulnerable time, we can carry it, and we can eat any pain, but we can't bear that my husband can obviously be considerate, send a comfort, give a hug, but he doesn't say anything, doesn't stand on your side, and puts on a "how can I be so glassy when I am a mother", he can't understand your postpartum grievances, not a few money can be solved.
Gorky said: Marriage is the spiritual union of two people, and the purpose is to jointly overcome all the difficulties and hardships of the world.
Since there is a marriage contract, you must share happiness and suffering, if you are unfortunate enough to encounter "widowed parenting", dare to express dissatisfaction and vulnerability in your heart, dare to seek help, find a nanny like Reiza, find someone who can help you, do not let yourself be in a desperate situation, suffer yourself, and suffer your children.