Researchers have different accounts of when jealousy occurs. Many Freudians believe that a child's jealous behavior occurs after he has a younger brother or sister. They point out that although the child is young, less than 1 year old or just over the age of 1, in fact, his jealous behavior has been fully developed. So, has the correctness of their conclusions been verified? To the best of my knowledge, no Floydist has actually tested his theory.
We made many observations to find out where the source of jealousy lay, and I myself had the opportunity to observe a child accepting his newborn brother. Before that, I introduced you to an experimenter B, the 2-and-a-half-year-old child, who you should remember that he already had obvious jealous behavior, and his jealous behavior pointed to his father. By the age of 2 and a half, he already had a strong attachment to his mother, and later to his nanny. However, at less than 1 year old, he did not form an organized response to any child. At that time, his mother was in the hospital for two weeks because of childbirth, during which time, it was his nanny who was responsible for taking care of B. On the day his mother came home, the nanny asked B to play in her room until we had all the conditions tested in place.
We arranged a well-lit living room for B, and the time for the experiment was noon. At the time, the mother was feeding her newborn baby, dressed with her chest open. Among those present were B's father, mother, newborn, and his grandmother and a trained nanny (B had never seen the nanny). B had not seen his mother for two weeks, and with the adult's permission, he came down the steps and into the room. We have long told everyone present to be quiet and to try to keep the situation as natural as possible.
B walked into the room, came to his mother, snuggled up to her mother's knees, and said, "Mom, hello." "Other than that, he didn't act any further. That is to say, he did not try to hug or kiss his mother, nor did he pay attention to the placket on her open chest and the baby in her arms. Almost 30 seconds later, he saw the newborn and said, "Oh, kid! Then he began to touch the baby's face, pat his little hand, and then say to the baby, "That little child, that little child." Not only that, but he also leaned over and kissed the baby, and it could be said that he did not mean to be jealous at all. In the process, he has always behaved with gentleness and kindness.
At this time, the nanny (B does not recognize him) picked up the baby, and when she saw this, B immediately reacted and said to his mother, "Mom, hold the baby." "Notice that here B reacts to the baby, and this response is like part of the mother's situation. This was his first reaction of jealousy, but his reaction was directed at the man who had taken something from his mother's arms (hindering his mother's actions), and this was a typical non-Freudian reaction. But we can see that this reaction is clearly not detrimental to the baby, although it is he who makes himself unable to be held by the mother.
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The babysitter carried the baby into his own room and placed him on the cot, and B followed. When he came out, his father asked him, "What do you think of Jimmy?" He said: "I like him a lot, he's sleeping. "It should also be noted here that throughout the process B has not paid attention to the mother's open chest, in fact, he has paid very little attention to the mother at any time except when he thinks of the baby at the moment when the nanny picks up the baby. And his positive reaction to the baby didn't last long, just a few minutes, and then he went to pay attention to other things.
The next day, his parents told B to make room free for his brother, and when he heard about it, he had a positive reaction. His room had a lot of books and toys, and in order to free it up as quickly as possible, he helped the adults pack up their things and move them all to another room. That night, he slept in his new room, and after that he was accompanied by a nanny.
From our observations of him, throughout, B's direction to the infant's behavior showed no sign of even the slightest sign of displeasure or jealousy. We have been observing these two children for a year now, and it can be said that they have not shown a single sign of jealousy. Now that B is 3 years old and his brother is 1 year old, he treats his brother the same way he did when he first met him, still so loving and caring. And he did not have the slightest sense of jealousy when his parents and the nanny at home picked up his brother and caressed him. But our observations are always ongoing, and we are also trying to find ways to stimulate his jealous behavior.
Once, the babysitter almost succeeded in arousing his jealousy, and the babysitter said, "Jimmy is a good child, and you are not as good as him, you are naughty, so I like Jimmy more." "Over the next few days, B showed signs of jealousy. However, since the nanny was dismissed within a few days, B's newly revealed jealousy also disappeared.
We found that there are no conditions sufficient to interfere with a child's attachment to his parents in his daily life. But when his brother is not around, he will also snuggle up to his mother like a 1-year-old brother; And when parents punish their brother, such as hitting his little hand, causing his brother to cry, 3-year-old B will attack his parents and hit them while saying, "Don't hit Jimmy, he's a good kid, you can't make him cry." ”