I decided to write this on an early spring morning.
That morning I had nothing to do, standing on the balcony on the fifth floor, watching the road outside the door of the community in the distance, the car passing through like a dragon. Those cars ran so fast, one passed, one passed.
The early spring sun has shaken off the cold of the winter and become much kinder, like a stepmother trying to make a kind appearance, although the smile is still a little fake, but after all, it is not as vicious as before.
The green tree downstairs is a plant called white wax, which is a very responsible tree that fulfills its mission dutifully, sprouting in spring, turquoise in summer, golden in autumn, and leaves fall in winter. At this time, it obeyed the call of the god of the seasons and spat out new green in a decent manner. The new green was so beautiful, goose yellow, tender like a baby's eyes, covered with a layer of water. I was almost touched by the green. Thinking back to the branches a few days ago, they were still bare, and there was no sign of life at all.
"Leaves fall under the tree." It was as if the mother's self-talk sounded in my ears. But isn't it? There are always times when the leaves are fresh and there are always times when they fall.
"Leaves fall under the tree". When I was silently reciting these words in my heart, a ray of sunlight happened to fall on a leaf, and suddenly a flash of light flashed in my head, and the light hit my heart down the river, slamming it, almost beating me to the ground. In that light, I saw my mother staggering along.
It was at that moment that I decided to write something in honor of my mother, who had been dead for ten years.
2. Bigfoot"Oh, it hurts, it hurts..." Many, many years ago, on such a warm and cold early spring, my mother, who was only eight years old, sat on the stone steps in front of the door with her feet in her arms, looking at the blue sky in despair and wailing. A sparrow flew sideways in the sky, and the light figure was simply laughing at her mercilessly.
Her mother, my grandmother, hid in the house without saying a word.
That morning my grandmother took my mother into her arms, took out two long strips of cloth, took off her socks, tucked her toes into the palms of her feet, and then tied them tightly with strips of cloth, and sewed them up with needles and threads, completely ignoring the howling of her only daughter like a slaughtered pig.
I suppose my grandmother must have been in pain, her own flesh and blood, but she had to be silent. How can I marry in the future without binding my feet? I'm not good for you yet?! She must have thought so and must have said so. Mothers all over the world are so self-righteous in their plans for their children. So my grandmother picked up the needle and thread, walked a pair of four-inch golden lotuses, and swung back to the house, leaving my mother sitting there alone and crying with tears in her heart. Her feet burned with pain, and she felt her toes broken.
At this time, her adoptive father came out of the south house, tied a pair of hands, and looked at my mother with great pain. My mother cried more and more: "Third Father, save me, save me!" I'm dying of pain! ”
"Nell, bear with me, endure, endure will not hurt." Her adoptive father coaxed her.
"I don't believe it! It's hurting more and more! "My mother was crying.
"Nell, don't cry, Third Father, will you buy you candy to eat?"
"This is going to go!" My mother cried.
My third grandfather then stood outside my grandmother's door and shouted, "Sister-in-law, Nell is in so much pain, I will take her out to buy a piece of candy to eat, and coax her?" ”
My grandmother probably thought it was a good idea, so she agreed at the door, and my third grandfather quickly picked up his adopted daughter and walked out of the door.
Out of the gate, my mother began to warn her adoptive father, let the shroud be removed, the third grandfather did not dare to make a private decision, went back to the third grandmother to discuss, the third grandmother is a happy person, three times five divided by two to cut the footshiel.
Whenever my mother talked about this passage before she died, she would say something like this: "My mother wrapped it up, and my adoptive mother cut it." After tossing it a few times, my mother was also annoyed, so she said, "Whatever, you can't marry out and pull it down!" So she was free, but two of her toes had been broken, and she was still a little disabled.
Although my mother's toes were disabled, the foot board grew like a rebel madness, until she had to wear thirty-nine shoes, and in old age, even forty shoes to fit her big feet. My mother had never worn leather shoes in her life, because the hard leather could not accommodate her toes that arched because they had been broken. This made it very difficult for a few of our sisters who had the heart to honor her.
3. SnakesI have asked my mother several times whether her birth mother was good to her or her adoptive mother. My mother always looked at the air in front of her and hesitated for a while, as if to invite her two mothers, who had long since died, to sit in front of her and compare them, and then she made up her mind and said, "It is better for me to be adoptive." ”
My grandmother's family was also once a large family in Liujiazhuang in the south of the city, which can be seen from the ancestral and three-entry courtyards.
My mother said that they made their fortune because of an old grandmother and a snake.
Legend has it that a few generations ago, the Liu family produced an old grandmother who was benevolent and kind, and the old grandmother's grain hoard was like a cornucopia, and the energy was always producing grain and was never empty. Since then, the Liu family has been solid, and their children and grandchildren have also begun to buy an industry to study and understand.
On her deathbed, the old grandmother warned her descendants that she was not allowed to peek at the grain hoard after she died. Some of the unworthy descendants refused to obey the ancestral precepts and found a large snake with red flowers lying in the old grandmother's grain hoard. The big snake disappeared shortly after being alarmed, and the Liu family has since fallen into the middle of the road.
The snake, an animal, is rare in the north, and because of its footless but fast-moving characteristics, it has been given many mysterious colors. For example, this snake of the old grandmother.
And one of the snake-related things I personally experienced when I was a child still don't understand. I was a teenager that year, and in the autumn, I followed my second brother to a slope behind the mountain where there was a water source to collect sesame seeds. The sesame seeds grow in the sesame clips, which grow on the sesame stalks, and our task is to carry the sesame stalks that have been put down in the field home so that the sesame seeds are removed from the sesame clips.
It was an autumn afternoon, and I was carrying a bundle of sesame stalks on a mountain path where the grass was yellowing. When passing a small stone cave, I inadvertently looked inside, my mother, a small gray-brown snake the thickness of chopsticks was entangled, entangled with each other, squirming, I felt my sweat and hair stand up, the hair on the top of my head also flew up, throwing down the sesame straw and running. The second brother saw me running back breathlessly, busy asking what was wrong, I stuttered again, he hurriedly followed me to find the small cave, but where is the shadow of the snake?
The wind was blowing its leaves, the grass was laying its seeds, the sun was still lazy, and a bundle of sesame stalks lay quietly among the weeds, with an innocent face. The years are quiet. The second brother looked back and smiled and said, "Are you blind?" "Yet I knew I didn't, but I couldn't explain why. A teenage girl whose eyes don't flower, she didn't lie either. However, the little snake that was still making a mess ten minutes ago just disappeared out of thin air, leaving no trace at all, which was the most supernatural thing I had encountered so far.
Return to the snake of the Liu family. The old grandmother's snake also disappeared out of thin air, and no one knew where it went. After a few lifetimes, one night, my mother's biological father, because he hated the heat in the house, slept under the door hole where there was a wind. Waking up in the middle of the night and finding a large snake with a red flower coiled around his chest, he sat up in shock, and the big snake was gone. My grandfather never got sick and died soon after. The talking man at the door of the Liu family said that the old grandmother saw that he was of good character and called him away to serve himself. My mother pointedly pointed out that her father was scared to death by a snake.
The three grandfathers and my grandfather are uncles and brothers, that is, their fathers are brothers, and they have the same grandfather. The two families lived together in the third courtyard of the Liu family compound, my grandfather lived in the north house, and the third grandfather lived in the south house.
The family of the eldest grandfather and the second grandfather who lived in the second courtyard was prosperous, but the third grandfather's family had no grain. My grandfather in the north room gave birth to my mother first, and then two sons. The third grandfather then consulted with my grandfather and said, "Second brother, you have three children, give me nizi." "My grandfather thought to himself, anyway, they all live in a courtyard, and the old three or two people are good, send it." So my mother went to the South House and became the adopted daughter of my third grandfather.
Who would have thought that my mother's two younger brothers would die one after another, and my grandmother would have no children to raise, and my mother would become the only child in the two rooms of my grandfather and third grandfather, and the two families would love her. And her adoptive parents, because my mother was not biological, had a little more hospitality and accommodation in their love, which is why my mother felt that her adoptive parents were better for her.
4. Old houseIn my childhood memories, every New Year's Day with my mother back to her mother's house to visit relatives, my mother always went to visit his adoptive father's second brother, my second grandfather, and ate and drank at the Kawu family in that room. And uncle Jiafu, who was closer in ethical relations, was very perfunctory, until finally he completely broke down and did not communicate with each other.
My mother was not present when my grandmother died. When she hurried back to her mother's house, Uncle Jiafu took out the deed to his grandmother's house and said that it was given to him by his aunt (my own grandmother). If this is true, it is equivalent to my grandmother succeeding Jiafu's uncle as a son, and he inherits the property and sends him to the end.
My mother didn't approve of it, saying that the deed had been stolen by Uncle Garfu. Because her mother never mentioned to her about her uncle succeeding Jiafu before she died. Moreover, Uncle Jiafu is idle, and even if the grandmother has the intention of adopting her son, she will not choose him. However, when the grandmother died, no one else was present, and no matter how suspicious the mother was, she could not change the reality that the house deed was in the hands of Uncle Jiafu.
In my childhood memory, it was the best five large tile houses. There are steps up in front of the door, the doors and windows of the room are tall, and the room is lined with straight pine purlins and beams. It can be seen that the people who built the house at that time were very economically powerful.
In the impression, Uncle Jiafu was tall and talented. Jiafu's aunt was a sick seedling. In my memory, she was always lying on the bed in the east room, her face was sallow, and she couldn't stop coughing. Whenever my mother and I went to see her, she struggled to sit up and leaned back on the pillow to talk, panting like a bellows. Within a few years, Jiafu's aunt died.
My mother said that my grandmother also died lying on the bed in that position. At that time, there was a bedside table next to the bed, and the house deed was placed in the drawer of the nightstand, and she always suspected that Uncle Jiafu had stolen the house deed when his grandmother was dying.
After the death of my own grandfather and grandmother, the closest to my mother's blood relationship and ethical relationship should be Uncle Jiafu. In terms of blood, Uncle Kafu is the child of my mother's uncle, and ethically speaking, Uncle Kafu is the son of my grandmother's successor. However, my mother did not like him from the bottom of her heart, and finally on the issue of the marriage of the eldest cousin, the two completely fell out, until they died, and did not have any contact.
That year, Liujiazhuang was demolished, and the cemetery was also relocated. The sons of Uncle Kafu, who inherited my grandmother's family property, have long forgotten all about my grandmother's and grandfather's grave, and uncle Kabu's children have moved their graves to the East Mountain together. And those five large tile houses, after demolition, changed the building, with the death of the older generation, no one knows its origin anymore.
5. StudyAs mentioned earlier, the old Liu family made a fortune because of the old grandmother, and the descendants began to seek merit after they had enough. At this point, the large house that lives in the courtyard dominates. My mother said that one of her great-uncles had once won the former Qing Dynasty Xiucai, but when he happened to be going to take the exam, his mother died, and he had to keep filial piety at home and prepare for the next exam. Even more coincidentally, not long after, the Qing family died, the scientific examination system was abolished, and her uncle died of depression. Years later, his grandfather's grandson --- a distant cousin of mine as a village teacher and later as the principal of the primary school, and my mother said that people in the big house would indeed study.
My mother also went to the academy, and it was a foreign school. I suspect it happened after the foot wrap.
After the foot binding incident, her adoptive father took her into Jinan Province. In her mother's mouth, her adoptive father was a capable man who could grind his face and knit a hand towel. So he rented a house in the east gate of Jinan Province, and opened a mill and a hand towel workshop. My mother enrolled in the nearest school and attended KoyaFang Primary School.
When my mother told me about her school, I was still young, and I thought that her school was called a goose and duck house, which had a lot of geese and ducks, and my mother did not go to school every day but to graze geese and ducks. Later, I checked the information and found that my guess really made sense. The primary school called Curyafang was originally a place where people raised geese and ducks in the Qing Dynasty, and later built a school, which was called Curyafang in its harmonic pronunciation. It is the predecessor of the current Huiquan Primary School in Jinan.
According to the data, Curyafang Primary School was founded in 1908, located near the Old East Gate, and the campus spans both sides of the moat, with a very beautiful environment. Destroyed by the Japanese army in the winter of 1937, classes resumed after renovation in November 1938, and in April 1947, it was changed to the Old East Gate Center National School in the third district of the city. When my mother was there, it was supposed to be the period from 1942 to 1944.
In her mother's few memories of the school, she was impressed by one thing: there were nuns in the school who mobilized students to join the school, and the mother went home after school to ask for her adoptive father's opinion. My third grandfather refused. He said, "We don't believe in anything, we only believe in eating." Listening to this, I don't think that my third grandfather is an uninformed rural mud-legged man, on the contrary, I think that my third grandfather lives a transparent, real, and great wisdom. There was also a text about roosters that she remembered vividly. The text is about the brothers' attitude towards a rooster. The brother said, "When the rooster is raised, he can eat meat." The younger brother said, "The rooster grew up and called me to get up early and study every day." "However, my mother was not as happy as my brother in the text, and could be woken up by the big rooster every day to go to school, because the situation was turbulent, and my third grandfather's mill could not continue, so he had to return to Liujiazhuang to continue farming." My mother's studies were also interrupted as a result.
Since I found the address of Gu Ya Fang, every time I passed the old east gate, I would look in that direction, although the house was heavy and I couldn't see anything, but in my mind, there was always a little girl like YingZi in "Seongnam Old Things", jumping to school. I knew it was my mother, who was sitting upright in the classroom at the other end of time, reading aloud, "Big rooster, oh wow..."
6. MarriageWhen my mother grew up happily under the pampering of my biological and adoptive parents, my father was still a poor cattle herder, and a poor boy who herded cattle for other people's families, because our family did not have a single sheep.
At that time, my great-grandfather used a flat shoulder and two broken baskets to move his family to this village closer to Jinan Province, which is really a place where there is no tile under the roof. When my grandfather arrived, he built three grass houses, but the family's food and clothing problems have not been solved. So my father grew up herding cattle and sheep for other people's homes, so that he could reduce the chewing of grain for the family. By the time he was fifteen years old, my grandmother had died of years of poverty and illness, leaving my grandfather with six children, large and small, in his prime. At that time, my great-aunt was already married, my uncle was arrested, and my father became the pillar of the family.
I once asked my mother why she, who came from a well-off family, married my father, who was so poor. My mother said that it was mainly because my grandmother felt that my father had no mother and that her daughter would not be abused by her mother-in-law when she entered the door.
My grandmother was really abused and afraid of her mother-in-law, and she didn't want her daughter to suffer the same sin anyway.
It is said that my grandmother's mother-in-law is my mother's grandmother, and my old grandmother is a person who is extremely strict with her daughter-in-law. This may come from the inheritance of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law since ancient times, or perhaps, from the moment she beat my grandmother into the door, she looked unpleasant, so she either beat her or scolded her.
In addition to the daily chores, my grandmother also had to make clothes for the family. One evening, my grandmother threw her a piece of green cloth and told her that tomorrow morning my grandfather was going to go to a relative's house for a drink of celebratory wine and to wear a newly made green cloth coat. I can't imagine how my grandmother spent that night, sewn under the dim oil lamp, and overnight, a coat was made. I thought that the green cloth coat must have been stained with my grandmother's tears.
My mother said that once my grandmother returned to her mother's house, she would not want to come back. Each time, her father ordered her brother to drag her across the mountain. My grandmother looked at the in-laws below the mountain, whimpered and cried for half a day, and then wiped away her tears and pretended to go home with joy. In front of her mother-in-law, she did not even dare to show her sadness and despair a little.
So when her daughter reached the age of talking about marriage, my grandmother said that the man's family was rich or poor, but there must be no mother-in-law.
My father's neighbor, Grandma Shi, was a warm-hearted man who walked the streets and alleys to do some small business, but also gave the young boy a cushion. When she heard about my grandmother's request, she thought of my grandfather's house. Although my grandfather's family is poor, the family is honest and willing to work, especially my father, who can bear hardships, work hard and have brains, and will definitely be a good hand in the future. The most important point is that my grandmother has passed away, my aunt and uncle are not at home, and if my mother marries over, she will immediately be the master of the house, and no one will be angry.
My grandmother asked my father's birthday to be measured, and it was really the life of "later rich". Her idea is very simple, it doesn't matter if my aunt's family is poor, I will give more dowry; it doesn't matter if there is no mother-in-law to help pull the child, there is me and her three mothers, absolutely can not let the girl's life fall to the ground.
My mother's lifelong event was decided by her parents in the seventeenth year of her life. By the rules of the day, she and my eighteen-year-old father had not met before marriage.
7. CousinTimes are becoming increasingly turbulent. Bandits in the mountains are also getting more and more rampant. They have developed from sneaking around to kidnapping rich people. Once the lord's family ransomed in time, they dragged the "meat ticket" into the river ditch and smashed it with stones, called "river stew". Young children of wealthy families in nearby villages have gone out to take refuge.
One of my mother's cousins, surnamed Yang, hid in the house for a while. My cousin, a former scholar, liked my mother, the little cousin who helped him wash his clothes and clean up the house, and changed her name from "Garland" to "Xiulan." Cousin Yang suddenly disappeared after living in the house for a while, and the family secretly said that he had followed the Communist party.
Many years later, a letter from Beijing was sent to the brigade headquarters of my village, which read, "Liu Xiulan," my sister Kiss Qi. The people at the brigade headquarters didn't know who "Liu Xiulan" was, because it was a daimyo that even my mother herself had almost forgotten. When the letter passed into my mother's hands, she learned that her cousin, who had changed her name, had indeed joined the People's Liberation Army, followed the team to the south and the north, and finally became an official in Beijing. In addition to talking about family affection, the letter also invited her to play in Beijing.
My mother did go to Beijing with my father, but she didn't go to see her cousin. My father said that they had already arrived downstairs from my cousin, but my mother refused to go up. She said that she knew that her cousin was still alive and well, so why should she see him again? So I went back home with my father. This story often reminds me of the prince you who "visited Dai on a snowy night", who came and went back with pleasure. Oh, my mother vaguely had some of the demeanor of a Wei and Jin celebrity.
Back to 1948. My cousin followed a communist party, but another communist team moved into my grandmother's house, which was preparing for the attack on Jinan Province.
The men and women in this team came and went in and out happily every day, as if there was no heart, and my mother looked very envious. When a female soldier saw that my mother often peeked at them doing things, he mobilized her and said, "Little sister, do you want to be a soldier?" Come to the ranks and join us in overthrowing the Kuomintang reactionaries and liberating all mankind! "My mother did not know who the reactionaries were and who was all mankind, and all she envied was the uniformed uniforms of the female soldiers and the sunshine on their faces. She ran to her adoptive father, who hurt her the most, and begged her, hoping that she could also become a soldier. Just like when she asked her adoptive father for a favorite toy, she felt that her adoptive father would definitely agree. But how is that possible? After all, her adoptive father was more knowledgeable than her, and he knew that being a soldier was not a joke, and if he didn't get it right, he would die, so he unceremoniously rejected her.
When my mother told me about this past when I was a child, she still had a longing on her face that could not be hidden. I also went down her train of thought: a rural girl named Liu Xiulan joined the revolutionary ranks with great vigor and vigor, went from place to place like her cousin, made meritorious achievements, and became a cadre after liberation, and I also became a child of the cadre family, and my brothers and sisters and I lived in a big revolutionary family that was happy and harmonious. In this story, the only male protagonist who is missing my father is missing. Because my mother, who had already succeeded in the revolution, could not marry my father, a cattle herder. But if there were no him, would I still be surnamed Zhang? Am I still me? My brother my sister or my brother my sister? I was very frustrated by such a thought. Forget it, I don't want the big revolutionary family, I don't want my father.
8. That nightThe night of the Mid-Autumn Festival in 1948. The moon is round and big.
The sporadic sound of gunfire that had sounded a few days earlier was getting louder and louder in the evening, louder than the explosions in the fifth day of the year.
In the morning, the line living in the West House lined up and sang and marched at a neat pace. After the team left, the cooks got busy and cooked mung bean soup with a flatbread. At noon, the bearded man named Lao Zhao and the sixteen or seventeen-year-old boy named Xiao Li carried food to deliver food to the team on the west side of Hongshan.
After an hour, they returned, and the flatbread and mung bean soup remained untouched. Their faces are ugly, they don't say or smile. That little Li still kept wiping away tears. My third grandfather leaned forward to inquire what was going on, and Xiao Li said, "The team is gone, and no one is eating." ”
My third grandfather's face is like the color of earth. So many people say that it is gone? It's really a knife and a gun without eyes.
Evening came, and the sun was like blood. My third grandmother is ready to brush the pot to cook.
"Let's make dumplings." Soldiers are in chaos, eating today and not knowing whether there is tomorrow or not. While everyone is still there, have a reunion dinner. My third grandfather said with a black face.
A lid of cushion dumplings is left with more than half. After all, the sound of gunfire is not the sound of explosions, and this August Festival is not the august festival of the past.
At the time of the palm light, another group of teams came from the courtyard. Old Zhao, the brother-in-law, led a cadre-like person into the room.
"Fellow, we're going to reinforce the mountain, can you show me a way?" Can you say no? Even if there is no gun pointed, you can't say no. My third grandfather stood up silently and was about to leave.
"Wait." My third grandmother found a large coat from the closet and handed it to him.
However, it is the Mid-Autumn Festival, and the day is not very cold. The big jacket handed over by the third grandmother did not know whether to let him block the cold or the bullet.
"Go early and come back early." The third grandmother said.
The third grandfather nodded, took the coat and put it on, turned and left.
The moon is like water. The wind blows the leaves, and the shadows reflected on the ground are like a yard of water grass fluttering.
When the third grandfather returned, it was already in the middle of the moon. The bright moonlight made his face look even more miserable.
None of the family slept and were waiting for him.
"Picked up a life." The third grandfather said as he took off his coat.
"Your grandfather's coat is soaked with sweat." My mother said later.
That same night, the People's Liberation Army invaded Jinan Province.
9. LaterOn the sixth day of the first lunar month in 1950, my grandfather borrowed jewelry and hired a palanquin to arrange the marriage between my father and my mother. The marriage house was two small east houses newly built in the yard, because there was no money to buy a wheatgrass roof, and the roof was paved with straw (corn stalks), which made the relatives, my mother's uncles and brothers as a joke for a long time.
My grandmother gave my mother a generous dowry, which included a whole set of wood carved furniture and a few acres of good land. My mother, as my grandmother expected, had no mother-in-law control or sister-in-law to be angry.
The only thing that my grandmother failed to count was that she and my third grandmother died early and failed to help my mother pull a few children. This was a great pain in my mother's heart, until I went to the grave with her after I understood things, and she still complained about her birth and adoptive mother because of this in her long crying.
She can't be blamed for that either.
As a small family Jasper who has been pampered since childhood, she has given birth to eight children (two of them died) in the eighteen years since she married into her husband's family, without the help of her mother-in-law and mother-in-law, not to mention the eight mouths of three meals a day, only to say that the dress of this family of eight is enough for her to be busy. And my father was really capable, he was not only a good hand in the crop field, but also a stonemason and mason, and later his reputation in the village grew, not only as a squad leader, a deputy brigade leader, a village chief, but also the weddings and funerals of the villagers. He can earn a family and let the family drink a big snack, but he does not care about the family, and he has no time to take care of his wife and children.
My mother was very upset about it. Many nights, when my mother had just put the children to sleep one by one and my father came home drunk and confused, my mother would be furious, and quarrels and even fights were inevitable.
It is difficult for a clean official to break the household chores. A slap doesn't make a sound. Fish and bear paws cannot be combined.
Well said, life is not good. My father had my father's reasons, and my mother had my mother's grievances.
So my mother often got sick, had headaches and brain fever, insufficient qi and blood, and was uncomfortable with liver qi... For three hundred and sixty days a year, at least three hundred days, my mother was unwell. Every once in a while, she asked my father to take her to the doctor for medical treatment. It's almost a medical addiction.
When I was a child, my home was often filled with the smell of medicine. On my mother's carved dresser, there were always all kinds of pills and herbs, and a few unopened Chinese herbs. On the earthy yellow medicine bag, two large black characters of "internal service" are neatly printed, and below it are generally scrawled ballpoint pen characters: Liu Xiulan.
Later, my brothers and sisters and I also analyzed whether our mother's illness was real or fake. The result of the analysis is that there are both true and false. To tell the truth, she is overworked, indeed in poor health; false, in fact, before the age of seventy, she did not have any major organic problems, but through some small diseases of the head and brain, to control our father, or to let my father care more about her.
The summer after my father's death, my mother said she felt something in her throat when she was eating. Take her to the hospital for a check-up, cardia cancer, advanced stage.
This time my mother was really sick.
Given her age and physical condition, the doctor decided not to have surgery and to take a conservative approach.
In the days that followed, my mother drank Chinese medicine and various folk remedies every day until she finally couldn't swallow the water.
I felt confused a week before my mother died, she didn't remember that she was sick of not being able to eat, she was always crying out for hunger.
The second sister fed her milk, she shook her head and said not to drink the thin, when the thin is not the top, she will eat the dry.
The second sister teased her: Give you steamed bun head to eat. My mother said that if you don't eat The Nest Head, the Nest Head had enough to eat when you were young, and you want to eat steamed buns.
The night before my mother died, I stayed in bed. In the middle of the night, I heard her shouting, "Wait for me, wait for me." I asked, "Who's waiting for you Mommy?" "Your dad." She replied vaguely and passed out again.
On the second day of the second lunar month in 2009, on the day of the dragon's head, my mother died at the age of seventy-six. It was less than two years since my father died.
My mother finally, following the old man with whom she had quarreled all her life, left.
10. Leaves fall under the treeThe Qingming Festival of the Year of Haihai, the wind is so strong.
I placed a bouquet of chrysanthemums in front of my parents' tombstones and found two stones to secure the bouquet so that it remained upright.
I know that my mother loved flowers when she was alive. But if I told her that this year's chrysanthemums had risen again, to five dollars a flower, my mother would have complained to me, thinking that I had spent money indiscriminately and would not live a life.
This old lady who had been away from me for ten years, I didn't have to think about it at all, and I knew the way she looked when she scolded me.
The black marble tombstone, like her black face when she scolded me.
The tombstone is engraved with Song characters: First Kao Zhang Gong Zhen Jialin
Xianfei Liu Shi Zhen Xiulan
Below are the names of the monumentalist, my two brothers and two sisters-in-law, two nephews and two nieces.
The tombstone is erected on the second Tomb Sweeping Festival after the death of her mother, nine years ago. At that time, neither my nephew nor niece had any children. Now, four children have seven more. Coupled with the four of us sisters and children who could not put their names on the tombstones, the population of my parents had reached more than thirty.
Will the children know about this old grandmother when they grow up? How would their father describe their old grandmother to them? If there is no written record, this lady surnamed Liu, named Xiulan, may soon disappear into the memory of later generations, like a grain of dust.
"Loquat evening green, sycamore fleas wither." Chen Genwei, falling leaves fluttering. The Thousand Words says. What translates into my mother's words is: "Leaves fall under the trees."
The heavens go back and forth, the cycle of cause and effect, and no one can be an exception.
All I did was pick up the leaf that had given me life, blow the dust on it, and put it in a notebook.
If there are descendants who occasionally turn to it, say, "It turns out that we still have such an old ancestor." "That's enough.
He is a member of Shandong Writers Association, Shandong Prose Literature Society, Shandong Female Photographers, Jinan Writers Association, and Jinan Calligraphers Association. Qilu Evening News Qingwei signed the supplement.
One point number Shandong financial literature