1.
I lay on a bamboo bed in the orchard, looking at the sparse stars in the sky. Grandma came over and asked me to go to my uncle's house for dinner.
I didn't go, my uncle was too fierce... There are too many rules in his house. I said while coughing.
Grandma said, don't you still want to learn martial arts, just talk to your uncle, let him go to old Li Tou.
I said, you and Third Aunt Mei are about to break your legs and it doesn't work, is it useful to ask Uncle? Everyone said that even the Heavenly King Lao Tzu would not be able to come.
Grandma sat down next to me and said, if it doesn't work, let your uncle try it.
I said, don't go.
Grandma also said that your cousin's relatives came, and I heard that there was a little boy who was about the same age as you.
I suddenly sat up from the bed and said, "Then I will go."
On the way back to the village, a few fireflies flew around, and the sound of clams sounded, but I felt very irritable. My cough has stretched from spring to summer. At first, the doctor said that he was allergic to Willow Silk and said that it would be fine when the spring had passed, but now it was summer, and I was coughing intermittently. My playmates also heard from nowhere that I had tuberculosis, which would be contagious, and suddenly the birds and animals scattered, and there was no one who would play with me.
I asked my parents if I really had tuberculosis and if I was going to die. They insisted it wasn't. But I still have vague concerns.
At the beginning of the summer vacation, my mother asked me where I wanted to go, and I said to go to my grandmother's house. In normal times, my mother would definitely worry that my grandmother would indulge me too much, saying that she would let me play all day, regardless of my study. But this time she happily agreed.
This made me shake their words again. Adults lie as simple as farting, and they are neither worried about their noses getting longer nor afraid that they will become puppies.
That winter, when Grandpa was dying, he said he wanted to eat watermelon. My grandfather said, where to get watermelon in the winter? My uncle said that the old man was leaving, that is, even if the stars in the sky were to find a way to pick them for him, we could not let him go with regrets. Finally, my father ran to the county town twenty miles away to finally buy watermelon, and my grandfather ate a small piece and left peacefully.
I wonder if my mother was fulfilling my dying wish as well.
There is also learning martial arts, before my father was not willing, said a girl, dancing guns to get sticks is not good at all, and there is no practical value. But this time, he took the initiative to tell my grandmother that the practice was also good, at least it could strengthen the body.
In this way, I came to my grandmother's house with hidden worries and fears.
When I arrived at my grandmother's house, the situation was not much better. My grandmother did not accommodate me because I was sick, and still criticized me all day long. My uncle even said that I was sick with laziness and was not working. Aunt Mei, she didn't know where to get a home remedy for giving birth, and began to be busy frying medicine and drinking medicine all day, rarely playing with me again.
Standing alone in an empty orchard, I felt like a fruit tree in winter, suddenly lonely, lonely, and uncared for.
2.
At my uncle's house, I met the boy, who was thin and small, standing quietly beside his cousin. The cousin smiled and said that his name was Xiao Wen.
I was just about to say hello to him when my uncle came in. The crowd suddenly narrowed their smiles and sat down in their respective positions with bated breath.
The uncle picked up the chopsticks and said, Let's eat. Only then did the crowd carefully pick up the rice bowl in front of them.
That's why I hate eating at my uncle's house. I don't know which TV series he learned from, every day he has a face, like the old man in the City God Temple.
The rules of his house are even more long, what can not speak loudly, eat quietly, can not make a sound. How quiet should it be? Even if a fly flies by next to you, you can hear what it is humming.
And I'm a person who can't keep my mouth shut, so I can't help but talk every time. But as soon as I opened my mouth, my uncle would knock me on the head with chopsticks, which made me hate him very much.
Naturally he didn't like me either. Every time I talk to people, I say that when I play, I am a leather monkey, and when I study, I am a goose, and I know how to jump up and down all day, without a little girl's look.
I was very angry when I heard it, even if I was naughty, why should I say that I was a stupid goose, and use such an ugly word as "horse".
During the meal, I picked up the cucumber, and just after taking two bites, my cousin and cousin hit it left and right, and one of them gave me a kick.
I coughed a few times. The uncle couldn't help it and said, don't cough when eating.
I said, I don't want to...
The uncle said, bear with me.
I buried my head in the bowl and thought to myself, "Don't you all know that I'm dying?" A group of adults with a dying child is really not ashamed.
I was full, and as soon as I looked up and saw that Xiaowen had finished eating, I lowered my voice and said, Have you ever seen a firefly?
Xiao Wen looked up at me, and then at my uncle, and the look in his eyes was like a frightened deer. He didn't answer and quickly lowered his head.
The uncle really took the chopsticks and knocked my head, saying that I was not allowed to talk when eating.
I covered my head and said, Didn't you just talk too? Besides, I'm done eating.
In response to me, it was my cousin's kick. I saw Xiao Wen's face blush.
It's so easy to wait for the uncle to finish eating, I jumped off the table and stopped Xiaowen, can we play together?
He immediately took two steps back, bowed his head, and said, I'm going back to my homework. After saying that, he followed his cousin away.
I came back sadly and heard my cousin telling my uncle that I wanted to learn martial arts.
The uncle said that this girl originally did not have a straight shape, and after learning martial arts, she did not know what kind of bird she had become. If people don't want to take it, I won't say it.
On the way back to the orchard, I kicked the pebbles on the road high and felt that everything in the world had become uninteresting.
3.
I find Xiaowen busy every day. In addition to writing his homework, he is constantly working: feeding pigs, herding cattle, pulling grass for sheep... I've never seen him play.
Every time I tell him, play for a while. He always didn't look up and said, don't play. Sometimes I snatched the scythe in his hand and threw it on the ground, and he wasn't angry, he just silently picked it up and went on to work.
I asked him, have you ever eaten mantis eggs? He said, no.
I said, have you ever caught a pheasant? He shook his head.
I handed him the watermelon to eat, and he waved his hand and said he would stain his clothes.
It's boring. I've never seen a kid like that, living like an adult, not fun at all.
On this day, I squatted alone in front of the door bored digging earth. Third Aunt Mei came over, and she said, why don't you play with Xiaowen?
I said, he doesn't play. He either studied or worked every day, busier than adults.
Aunt Mei said that this child is quite special, sensible and obedient, and never provokes adults to be angry.
I said, he's not special at all, he's not like a kid.
Aunt Mei smiled and said, Are you like a child? A whole lot of weird thoughts all day long, more than adults think.
I said, do you know when Xiaowen will come home?
Aunt Mei said, go home? Where does he still have a home? His father died, and his mother married again, so he lived in this relative's house for a few months, and that relative's house lived for half a year.
This child is sent to the fence, of course, to see the face of the person, who can play open all day like you. Aunt Mei continued.
I didn't understand her words too much, but I thought Xiaowen was so pitiful.
In the evening I went to the river beach and told him to come home for dinner. He was still mowing the grass.
I said, can you still see it so late? And now there are mosquitoes everywhere.
He didn't answer my words and suddenly asked me, why do you want to learn martial arts?
I said, of course, grow up to fight villains. My cousin said that learning martial arts is to do chivalry and righteousness, sweep away evil.
He was stunned.
I said, actually, I don't understand what he's talking about. But my dad said he could exercise.
He put down his scythe and asked me, can that be immortal?
I looked at him seriously, almost laughing to death, I said, then you should go to alchemy, you should not practice martial arts.
He smiled when he saw me, lowered his head again, and continued to mow the grass.
I asked him, why do you want to live forever?
He said that I was waiting for my mother to come back, and I was afraid that I would die early and would never wait for her to come back. If I could live forever, no matter how long it took, I would definitely be able to wait for her to come back.
I said, this is simply impossible, even if you are immortal, what about your mother, she will not be old, will not die?
He doesn't speak.
I said, will your mother come back?
He said, yes. My grandmother told me that as long as I was obedient, listened to the adults, and did not mischievous, my mother would soon come back.
I didn't understand what he meant. How to do it as a good thing? Listening to adults, never crying, not making trouble, not playing, is it good? If that's the case, then he's the most well-behaved kid under the heavens, so why hasn't his mother come back?
I don't understand.
4.
One afternoon, I saw my cousin drying clothes alone in the yard, so I went over and asked her, sister-in-law, is Xiaowen obedient?
My cousin said, of course, I have never seen a child as well-behaved and sensible as him.
I said, then why hasn't his mother come back?
My cousin was stunned, and I told her Xiaowen's words.
My cousin looked at me and continued to dry my clothes. She said it was his grandmother who coaxed him, and his mother had been dead for several years.
I was stunned, which meant that he would never wait for his mother to come back.
So what's the use of him being so well-behaved?
He worked silly every day, just because he still had a beautiful dream in his heart, and he didn't know that dream would never come true.
I feel wronged for him.
I went to the river beach to look for Xiaowen, and he was not there. A couple of wild children played pranks and threw mud at me. I got angry and dug up the silt on the river beach and threw them away.
When I arrived at the orchard, Xiaowen was sitting under the tree to write his homework. He was stunned to see me, and I knew that I had only eyeballs on my body and were not covered in mud.
Grandma was angry, and she took my arm and went back to change clothes.
She said, how can your girl's family make this happen. If you look at people's small texts, every day honestly, you know to study, help adults work. You, like a fool, know how to play all day.
I didn't think so, and when I came out of the dress, I took a storybook and came looking for Xiaowen.
I said, shall I tell you a story?
Before I could open the book, my grandmother rushed over and said, "Don't you know how to read some useful books?" Watching these messy things all day. She said and stuffed my book into the stove.
I cried and ran alone into the reeds.
A moment later Xiaowen came, and he stuffed the storybook into me—it was burned to the ground.
He said, you're so nice, you can still read storybooks, I've never read them.
I said, do you like to read storybooks too?
He said, I like it too, I just...
He didn't say anything, just looked up at the sky. The moon had risen, and the fireflies were once again flying among the grasses with small lights.
He suddenly let out a cry of pain.
I was frightened by him, and that was the first time I had seen him cry. I said, my book is burned, what are you crying?
He cried for a long time before he stopped, his shoulders still twitching slightly.
He said, it turned out that my grandmother lied to me, I always thought that I was not good, I did not do well, so my mother did not come back. I worked hard and obediently, just to get her to come back soon.
It turned out he already knew.
I didn't know how to comfort him, so I watched him cry silently alone.
At that time I thought he was sad to know that his mother was gone. It wasn't until years later that I really realized how much it hurt him, not only because he didn't have a mom, but also because he was a kid but never had a real childhood.
5.
One day, I stood on the river beach and threw small pebbles into the water. Xiao Wen stood next to me and said, is it like these small stones that people die, fall into the water, and then never see again?
I said that Third Aunt Mei once told me a story, saying that once upon a time there was a country called Haiguo, where the souls of people would turn into grass, flowers, and trees after they died, and they would grow on the side of the road where their relatives walked. Although the flowers will be thankful, they will bloom again. The grass will wither, but it will still grow. They stay with their loved ones year after year and never really leave.
His eyes lit up and he said, "This story is so good, if it were true."
I said, how do you know if it's true? Maybe your mother is watching you somewhere. You're glad she can see, you're sad she knows, it's just that you can't see her.
He looked into the distance, as if suddenly emboldened. He said that I must live happily after that, and I don't want my mother to see me sad.
Sure enough, from then on, he began to become happy.
We went to the woods together to catch cicada pupae. I dangled around with the flashlight, and sometimes the light hit him in the face and he smiled.
We went to the vegetable patch to pluck grass. It was the height of summer, cucumbers were wearing small hats on their heads, loofahs were swinging, vegetable worms were lying on the leaves, and sunflowers were standing, looking up at the sun. He laughed as he listened to me tell the story.
He heard from nowhere that there was a wild vegetable on the river beach that could cure coughing, so he went to look for it every day.
The summer sun was like a fireball, and the whole river beach was scalding hot, and I said, don't look for it, it's too hot, go back. My dad said it would be fine as long as I took my medicine well.
He deliberately said it out loud, and I didn't believe the adults.
Then the two of us laughed.
One morning, my dad came to pick me up and said he was going to take me to the hospital for a follow-up.
I said, can I go back to my grandmother's house immediately after the examination?
My dad said, let's see what happens.
After the examination, my father took the report form like a book of heaven and carefully handed it to the doctor. The doctor frowned for a moment, and then listened to my chest and back. I couldn't help it and said, Uncle, am I dying?
The doctor looked at my father, laughed, and said, you will not die, just a little problem, I will change your medicine, eat it.
I said, didn't you really lie to me?
The doctor said, don't lie to you, deceive people is a puppy. Hello good medicine, go back and exercise more.
I was very happy, I told my dad that I was going back right away, and Xiaowen was definitely waiting for me.
When my father sent me to the mouth of my grandmother's village, Xiaowen was really standing there waiting for me.
When he saw me, he immediately shoved something into my hand. When I looked, it turned out to be an egg with gray and fluttering chicken feathers on it.
He said I picked it up in the wheat heap. When I think about it, raw eggs are boiled in hot water and drunk without coughing.
My dad laughed and said, "I've made new friends so soon."
I went home with the hot egg in my hand and Xiaowen.
On the way, he asked me, are you really not going to die?
I said, no, the doctor swore to me.
He said, don't lie to me, I'll be sad.
I said, know, know, you're afraid you'll let your mom see your sad look.
He laughed and said, I know the story you told me last time you made it up yourself.
I said, you went to ask Aunt Mei?
He shook his head and said, I just know, I've seen a lot of stories you wrote in the orchard, I read them, and I like every one of them.
That was the first time someone said a story like me.
I almost cried with pleasure. I said, but the adults didn't like it, and my uncle said I wasn't doing my job.
He said, why let them like it, just let someone like it.
That sentence was a great inspiration to me at the time.
6.
One night, Xiaowen came to me, and he was mysterious and said that he would take me to a fun place.
We walked along the river beach for a long time and didn't know how many villages we passed. Later, I was tired and thirsty, and my coughing became worse and worse. Xiao Wen picked me up and walked a long way.
We stopped by a river pond. I saw fireflies flying across the sky. They flickered in the night sky, as if the stars in the sky had fallen to the ground. That was the first time I'd seen so many fireflies.
He said, does it look good?
I said, it's so pretty.
He said, I never knew that patches of fireflies looked so good.
I said, do you blame your grandmother?
He shook his head and said, I know that my grandmother lied to me because she was afraid that I would be naughty at a relative's house and would make people dislike me. She's for my own good.
I looked at his face and suddenly wanted to cry.
I said, every summer we'll come here to see the fireflies, okay?
He said, okay.
But in fact, that was the last time we saw fireflies together.
After that summer, he was officially adopted by a relative in the provincial city, and I have not seen him since.
He didn't tell you, probably because he was afraid you would be upset. Cousin said.
But I'm still very happy, I think he must have started a new life.
Then my cousin and cousin divorced, and I completely lost news of him.
Over the years, I've been wondering what it meant that we had met, and maybe it was like the fireflies that night that illuminated our lives for each other.
I'll go there every summer to see the fireflies. I want to tell him that no matter where you are now, you must continue to live a brave and gentle life.
May all encounters in the world be to illuminate each other's lives.