Lu Yu once said in "Chance Encounter":
"Whoever has been or is experiencing their darkest moments in life is a long, dark, cold, desperate tunnel."
And now Shanghainese, every day seems to be the darkest moment. Every night after counting the refrigerator and sleeping worriedly, every morning after grabbing the dish, nervously open the data released in Shanghai, and then open the day's nucleic acids, antigens, group buying, scolding women, and asking for help.
However, I don't know why, there are events that refresh the bottom line every day. How many people seem to be light and cloudy, but in fact, their hearts have long been full of holes.
01
Two days ago, it was rumored on the Internet that Qian Wenxiong, director of the Information Center of a District Health Commission in Shanghai, hanged himself in his office at 1:19 p.m. on April 12, 2022. On the 13th, his family issued an obituary through Qian Wenxiong's circle of friends, confirming the unfortunate news.
About Director Qian Wenxiong, we don't know much, only that he graduated from a doctor, is smart and capable, has a Dink family, and his lover has advanced cancer.
The reason for Qian Wenxiong's death is that the ideological burden is heavy and the work pressure is great. A few short obituarys are written with grief.
Some people say that they can't help but quit, but at this time, quitting and resigning is different from the past; others say, "It is better to die than to live", but there is no empathy in this world, from another point of view, perhaps for him is a kind of relief, but also a kind of responsibility.
02
In the milk tea shop, a takeaway guy sat in the corner with his head bowed, not sleepy, just tired.
After waiting for an hour, still did not line up their own orders, and communicated with customers whether they could add a few dollars to the queue fee, the customer refused and directly canceled the order.
Not only is this single white, but the money for milk tea must also be pasted by itself.
What was originally a meager income from running errands turned into a few cups of bitter milk tea. The little brother sitting in the corner was getting lower and lower, unable to suppress his inner grievances.
Someone took out 50 yuan in pain, but the little brother pushed away with his hand and shook his head, still not holding back the tears.
03
In the early morning, a middle-aged uncle in the community got drunk.
He walked to the middle of the road and suddenly shouted like a fallen child," Mommy! Then he fell to his knees.
It turned out that the uncle's mother had long since passed away.
The collapse of adults must be silent, and even "missing" has become a suppressed secret in the heart, even if it is a shout of "mother".
Only when you are drunk do I dare to say to you, Mother, are you okay in heaven, I miss you.
04
Early in the morning, Haikou Wanlv Park.
A tall banyan tree, a cold body, floated in the air.
"It's scary, there's a guy hanging from a park tree." The scene that happened in front of me made people feel cold.
This is a middle-aged man in a suit who looks like a decent man.
In his suicide note, the man wrote:
"Thank you for your hard work, don't waste any resources to investigate, I have a problem in my heart, please don't call my parents."
On the mobile phone interface, he also deliberately retained a sentence: "Don't save me, I am committing suicide." ”
Until the last moment of departure, the man was still polite and gentle, he was afraid of bringing trouble to others, and he was worried about his parents at home. Only for death, unswerving.
How desolate is a person's heart, so that he can plunge into the abyss of death in a place where he is "facing the sea and blossoming in spring"?
At the moment of death, I don't know what is in his heart? despair? extrication? Or remorse?
05
Some time ago, there was a cute Chongqing man who was on fire.
He didn't even have time to take off his hard hat after work, so he jumped home on the sidewalk.
Yang Caiming, 57, is as happy at this moment as a 5-year-old child after school.
Netizens are very curious: what is the happy event that can make Uncle Yang jump so happy?
He said: "No salary, no good news, no lottery. After work, you should have fun, you should relax your spirits, change your mood, and jump around to be more comfortable."
In fact, Yang Caiming's work is not easy at all, get up at 5 o'clock in the morning, go to the construction site before 6:30, spend two yuan to solve breakfast, and start a long day of work.
In order to support the family's life, the uncle's workload is even more than that of young people.
However, "hard work is the essence of life, as long as you are happy!" ”
06
When we grow up, we understand that poverty and depression and perennial water reversal are actually the norm in life.
In the face of life, sometimes even if we try our best, we still can't stop the tests and changes in life.
And the world when you grow up is either bitter here or there. The dignity of adults is vulnerable, and the collapse of adults is caught off guard and cannot be defeated.
Each adult has two masks. A mask is a living tiger with its back to the mirror, if nothing happens, each of them is decent, clenching their teeth and desperately trying; a mask is a fragile and sensitive person facing the mirror, with a heavy heart, an uncontrollable emotion, and a silent collapse.
Fu Seoul once said:
"Human tragedies and joys are not the same, and the collapse of adults does not require an audience."
"Of course, the collapse is everyone's right, but the collapse that cannot be hidden is only a scar, and the collapse that is hidden is the medal."
Indeed, silence has long been the label for adults. We are always trying to keep our emotions out of the blue and untraceable. It's just that people have lasted for a long time, all the troubles have accumulated together, and the mood is depressed to the extreme, so at a certain moment, a very small thing can bring out all our grievances and make us on the verge of collapse.
07
As long as people live, they will definitely feel the pressure. So how should we deal with the increasing pressure?
Serotonin exercises for 5 minutes a day
Serotonin is a neurotransmitter in the brain that keeps our brain awake. When we wake up in the morning, when we feel refreshed, it is a state of serotonin balance, and when people are awake, they will be active, and they will slow down when they sleep.
Enough serotonin will allow us to have a "normal heart" so that we will not hurt ourselves and others because our emotions are out of control.
So how do you get serotonin active? There are two methods: sunshine and rhythmic movement.
It is recommended that you can do a 30-minute "sun bath" in the morning, that is to say, 30 minutes in the sun, you can walk and sit quietly, of course, you must also pay attention not to look directly at the sun to avoid hurting your eyes.
Also, make rhythmic movements a habit. For example, zazen, yoga, tai chi, singing, chewing gum, etc., be sure to choose a rhythmic exercise that suits you. Two things to note is not to exercise when you are tired, and not to do particularly strenuous activities. 5-30 minutes, not more than 30 minutes.
Crying can be relaxing
In a state of stress, the nerves are in a state of high tension, which is relieved while sleeping, and crying can achieve the same effect.
When the feelings accumulate to a certain stage, the tears can't help but flow down, and after crying, you will feel a feeling of pain and pleasure. The difference with laughter is that laughter is spirit. After crying, the previous confusion and nervousness were improved. Crying also boosts our immune system.
After working for a week, people will have some pressure accumulation. You can use your tears to decompress on the weekend, then take a good rest and recharge your batteries and usher in the new week with a refreshing brain.
If you are under pressure and can't cry, stuck in the chest is uncomfortable, you can choose to watch sadness or move movies, listen to sounds, etc., trigger the tear point.
Empathy is also effective against stress
In a "pat on the back" experiment, two people in a group, one person at a frequency of 1 second, gently patted the other person's back.
The results of the experiment were surprising, the serotonin concentrations of both the person who was photographed and the person who slapped rose.
In other words, while doing things for others, you can also heal yourself.
So, sometimes, when we encounter unhappy things, we like to talk to someone we trust, because he can understand us, even if it is silently listening, or a hug, we can feel comforted, and the pressure will be relieved in an instant.
And when two people have the same situation, this feeling of being healed is enhanced, which is the power of empathy.
If the heart is sunny, why fear temporary haze. Life is not easy, I hope that everyone can get more energy to take a step forward after reducing stress. If you encounter something that you really can't think of, please seek professional means in time and look for professional psychological counseling platforms and psychological hotlines on the Internet for help.
END