Original illustration: Meow Meow Xia, narrator: Ou Yue, female
01
This year's Spring Festival, I blacked out Ou Hua in front of my mother, and at the same time announced that I had completely severed my sisterly relationship with her.
The mother said with tears in her eyes: "You have also given birth to two daughters, if your daughter makes such a mess in the future, won't your heart hurt?" ”
I said to my mom, "I would never let my daughter be like this." ”
Our sisters have come to this point and have a lot to do with their parents' eccentricity.
02
My name is Ou Yue, and I was born in 1988 in the countryside of Hubei Province.
Ou Hua is my sister, two years younger than me.
His parents were farmers who shaved food in the fields, and they had to raise two children, and the family was unimaginably poor.
As the eldest in the family, I have taken on the responsibility of taking care of my family with my parents since I was a child.
The memory of childhood is always that my father sat in the doorway drinking a little wine, and my sister hid in the room to study.
While I was washing clothes in the sun, my mom was doing housework while scolding me and scolding my dad.
But never scolded my sister.
It is not that my sister is well-behaved and sensible, but that she has been especially good at superficial kung fu since she was a child to please her parents.
As for me, I obviously do the most work, but I have the lowest status in the family.
In my mother's words, who makes you the boss.
Should the boss work more, should he be beaten, should he let his sister go?
03
As soon as I graduated from junior high school, my parents wanted me to go to the south to work to subsidize my family.
After his uncle who was far away in Shenzhen knew about it, he severely criticized his parents.
Later, with the financial support of my uncles and aunts, I had the opportunity to continue my studies.
Still, I didn't become the kind of kid my parents saw who got ahead by reading.
I graduated from high school and was admitted to only one junior college, at the same time, my sister was admitted to the key high school in the county, and her grades improved steadily.
There is no harm without contrast.
Obviously, my uncles and aunts funded my completion of my studies, but for my parents, I did not earn money to subsidize my family, which was a loss-making business.
Therefore, for three years of college, they were not even willing to give two hundred yuan of living expenses per month, and every time they called for money, my mother would scold for half a day, and where every penny was spent, she wanted me to report the account.
After graduating from college, I was finally able to support myself, but since I went to Shenzhen to work, my mother would call every month to ask for money.
There are many reasons, the family's personal contacts, Dad's waist is sprained, and my sister has to pay tuition.
It is no exaggeration to say that in the years before graduation, my salary was basically squeezed dry by my family.
04
Speaking back to sister.
Although we are sisters, our relationship has not been good since childhood.
Other people's sisters love each other, or love each other and kill each other, which does not exist in our place.
My sister was well-behaved and cute in the eyes of my parents, but for me, my sister was a particularly selfish and narcissistic person from childhood to adulthood.
When the family made something delicious or bought new clothes, my parents always let my sister choose first.
And the sister will always take the best away, and her speech is particularly angry: "My parents like me the most, so I have to use the best." ”
When we were young, we slept in the same bed and covered the same quilt, and my sister had to sleep wrapped in a quilt every night, and I often woke up in the middle of the night.
One winter, because I couldn't grab the quilt, my back was full of frostbite, but my parents ignored it.
Later, my sister went to a key high school and was admitted to Hubei University, becoming a high-achieving student in the eyes of her parents and the glory of the whole family, so her preference for her was more blatant.
Whatever she wants, she will be satisfied at the first time.
05
Since my sister went to college, I have had to pay for her living expenses, 800 yuan per month.
I wanted to refuse, but I couldn't resist my mother's one phone call a day.
Most rural families are like this, the boss is the cash machine at home, I can't change my personal destiny, only to work overtime and earn more money.
At that time, I didn't know that there were bullying in the family who were afraid of hard.
Unreasonable demands between family members, but if they get up, they will be endless.
In my sister's junior year, my mother called and said that there was a problem with my sister's student loan, and asked me to find a way to borrow 20,000 yuan to make up for her tuition fees from previous years.
This amount of money, for me, who was only 2600 yuan per month at the time, was simply astronomical, not to mention that my salary was subsidized to my family, even if there was a deposit.
But my mother didn't care about this at all, she offered to let me borrow money from colleagues and friends: "You have a job and a salary, slowly pay them back, your sister's tuition is absolutely unbreakable." 」 ”
I didn't want to borrow money, so my mom said, if I didn't borrow it, she would immediately take the train to Shenzhen and personally come to my leader.
I know that she's not just intimidating, she can do this kind of thing.
06
Eventually, for the first time in my life, I borrowed money from a colleague and made up for my sister's tuition.
But this move did not exchange the gratitude of my sister, on the contrary, whether it was my parents or sisters, they were more advanced, and even took my efforts for granted.
Grievances?
Very aggrieved.
But at that time, I was still embarrassed and tried my best to meet their demands.
If nothing else, just to get a little love and a very good affirmation of the eldest daughter.
But alas, I couldn't ask for it.
07
In the blink of an eye, my sister graduated from college and signed a job in Foshan.
Foshan is not far from Shenzhen, but she rarely contacts me, which makes me feel very uncomfortable, complaining to my mother, my mother said that my sister is afraid that I will let her pay off her student loans.
At that time, I changed to a high-paying job, and talked about a boyfriend in business, and the economic conditions were getting better and better, and I never thought of letting her pay back.
Later, my boyfriend and I held a wedding in Shenzhen, and my sister finally came and gave me 5,000 yuan of money.
I was very touched, I felt that I had misunderstood my sister, and I also felt that my sister had finally grown up.
I naively thought that after all, blood is thicker than water, and our sisters' honeymoon period, although it came late, came in the end.
Until then a series of stories happened...
08
Not long after the marriage, I became pregnant, and my parents took the initiative to ask Miao to come to Shenzhen to take care of me.
It was the warmest time in our family.
Because of the arrival of her parents, the number of times my sister came to Shenzhen increased, and on weekends, we took our parents to the park and went to the mall, and the family was happy.
When I was seven months pregnant, my sister suddenly quit her job and said she was going to Guiyang.
I learned that she had a boyfriend, her junior high school classmate, who invited her to work in Guiyang, and her salary was much higher than in Foshan.
After listening to my sister's introduction, I think her boyfriend is not very reliable, like doing pyramid schemes.
But the sister is in love with the brain, dead or alive to go to Guiyang, but also said that her boyfriend has a house and a car in Guiyang, it is impossible to deceive her.
A few days later, she secretly bought a ticket to Guiyang.
Although I was angry, I could only let her go.
09
As a result, I was right, and my sister was not only tricked into doing pyramid schemes herself, but also wanted to trick her parents into going offline.
At that time, I had just given birth to a child, and she made a phone call every day, saying that she missed her parents, and said that the scenery in Guiyang was good, so that her parents could travel.
Mom and Dad were also worried about her, and finally decided to let Dad go to see her, and before leaving, my sister offered to let me return her share of the money she had with her.
After my father went to Guiyang, he found that something was wrong, but my sister was already in a rage, saying that she would not turn back, and detained my father in Guiyang.
In the end, I threatened to call the police, and she was willing to let her father come back, but she herself was still obsessed and dreamed of getting rich overnight.
Since then, relatives and friends have constantly called me, saying that Ou Hua invited them to play in Guiyang, and I told them the truth and asked them not to be deceived.
As a result, I became a stumbling block on my sister's road to riches, and you can imagine how much she hated me.
Those days, she kept calling me and scolding me, what was hard to hear.
Looking at the face of my parents, I endured and endured.
10
Two months later, my sister called her mom and said she wanted to go home.
Although I was furious at what she had done these days, it was my sister.
In my mother's words, she knows it's wrong, and you, as a sister, have to pull her along.
When my sister returned, she promised to start over in front of her parents, but she never apologized to me.
Whenever she talked about it, her mother played a round field on the side: "Your sister is too young, she has just been fooled by others, don't mention the past things again, you are a sister, how can you be angry with her." ”
In the eyes of parents, the sister's affairs can always be major.
In the eyes of her sister, as long as she has the help of her parents, she can be blatantly selfish.
11
After that, my sister lived in my house for two full years.
During this period, she never said that she would move, even if she received a monthly salary of tens of thousands of dollars, she had no intention of going out to rent a house.
I've also been reminding her that she either doesn't answer the phone or changes the subject.
I deeply realized what it is to ask God to be easy and difficult to send God.
Although my parents came to take care of me, they were more likely to take care of her life.
Every day, when you cook something, you have to call her first and ask her if she likes to eat it.
My sister, who regards my home as her own home, hides in her room every day when she comes back from work to play with her mobile phone, and comes out to eat when she arrives at dinner.
When she encounters unpleasant things in the workplace, she has to coax her with her whole family.
Several times, I felt that we were not very suitable for living together, but every time I mentioned it, my mother shed tears, saying that my sister was young and she was not at ease when she went out to rent a house.
Fortunately, my husband hurt me and forgave me, plus he has been doing engineering in the field for many years and cannot take care of me and my children, so he always advises me to say that he has parents and sisters around to help, and he is also relieved to work outside.
It had to be left to rest.
12
Later, I gave birth to my second eldest, and there was not enough room at home, so I officially offered to let my sister move.
As a result, my sister lost her temper, saying that I could not tolerate her in my eyes, and also sarcastically ridiculed me for getting richer and more critical, and the new house was not renovated, forcing her to go out and rent a house.
Yes, my husband and I bought a three-bedroom apartment at that time, but it hadn't been renovated yet.
In my sister's logic, the room is not enough to stay, why not renovate the new house.
I was choked by her for half a day and couldn't speak: she was really completely spoiled. In her consciousness, exploiting relatives is a matter of course and righteousness.
Not long after this quarrel, she talked about a boyfriend in Fujian and offered to move out.
Before my sister moved away, I specifically told her that I wanted her to move because I wanted her to be independent, not to let her go and live with her boyfriend.
As a result, a piece of my kindness was treated as a donkey liver lung.
My sister not only lived with her boyfriend, but also became pregnant unexpectedly.
And the so-called boyfriend, who had already married and had children in his hometown, was cheated on again.
At home, she is a domineering woman, but in society, she is a typical brainless woman.
However, she suffered a loss and was injured, and the first thing she thought of was not to review herself, but to return home to ask for sympathy and let her family take care of the aftermath.
13
The whole thing obviously has nothing to do with me, but my parents blame me.
Especially my mother, seeing that my sister was going to force the scumbag man to obey with the child in her belly, she even said that it was I who urged my sister to move, and she would be deceived by the scumbag.
I broke down and cried out to her, "You don't blame her for this, but you blame me, don't you think it's ridiculous?" ”
Next, I count what my sister has done over the years.
Living in my house for two years, never paying a penny to my parents for living expenses, I have two children, busy and tired, she never took the handle.
Once, the children got the flu, and I asked her to come to the hospital after work to help, but she said that the unit did not have time to organize a dinner.
"Mom, you say in good conscience, haven't I done enough for her all these years?" What did she do for me? What has been done for our home? It was your pampering that brought her to where she is today. ”
My mother said timidly: "Your sister is aggrieved in her heart, and after so many years of sending people to the fence, her life is not good." ”
I sneered, "Have you ever seen someone like her under the fence?" Food comes to open your mouth, but also to pick fat and thin, housework never reached out, clothes still need you to wash. ”
My mom said, "She's your sister, why are you thinking so much?" ”
I asked in particular, "I took her as my sister, when did she ever take me as a sister?" Your eccentricity has completely made her crooked. Can you really support her for the rest of your life? ”
The first time my mother saw me crying so bitterly, although she was still not convinced, she also closed her voice.
14
After this fight, my sister disappeared for three months.
I decided not to take care of her business anymore and not to allow my parents to take care of her.
I told my parents that she was already an adult, and if you don't educate her, society will naturally educate her, and instead of regretting it in the future, it is better to make up your mind now.
Who would have thought that three months later, my sister would lead a man to knock on my door.
Yes, she talked about a new boyfriend again, and as for the baby in her belly, she had already had an abortion.
In her words, she is now a brand new Ou Hua.
My mom cried and cried about it, saying she didn't know how much she had suffered outside.
In fact, the sister did not have much affection for her ex-boyfriend, and after finding out that she had been deceived, she wanted to take the child in her belly to ask him for a sum of money.
And all of this, her new boyfriend knows and is willing to be with her.
So, she decided to marry a new boyfriend.
She came back this time to tell us that she and her new boyfriend were ready to buy a house and get married.
15
From what I know about my sister, she can't save money to buy a house, and her new boyfriend is not like a person who lives a down-to-earth life.
When things go wrong, there must be demons.
Sure enough, she specifically mentioned that I used her ID card to buy a house in Zhongshan a year ago.
At that time, my husband could buy a house in Zhongshan at an employee's internal price, but because we already had two apartments in Shenzhen, we had to pay for it all, and we would not be able to come up with so much cash for a while and a half.
After all this, I wanted to buy it with my sister's ID card, and she readily agreed, so she knocked on my LV bag as a thank you gift.
The house was eventually loaned in her name, but the monthly payment of four thousand dollars a month was repaid by me.
Because of this, she often asked me for gifts as a thank you.
I also never took it seriously.
Now she suddenly asked me, does Zhongshan's house have any impact on her current loan to buy a house?
I was confused by her question, quickly look for someone familiar with the real estate policy to consult, the answer is that Zhongshan has a house, Shenzhen is not two sets, but as long as there is a loan record down payment will be 50%, 20% higher than the first suite.
And I also clearly told her that if she really wanted to buy a house in Shenzhen, the extra 20% down payment, I would give her the bank loan amount.
16
Supposedly, this is the best way to deal with it.
But from that day on, my sister began to stir things up, saying that the interest rate and down payment of her home loan had an impact, and the deed tax also had an impact.
Later, my mother did not mean to mention that my sister was still half a year away from the qualification to buy a house.
I had to ask my sister in a low voice how she wanted to solve it, and she actually said that this matter affected her credit card and spending quota.
I was so angry that I was speechless, and finally reacted, my sister just wanted to blackmail money.
And my mother, the whole time stood on the side of my sister, when she used her sister's ID card, she also tried to persuade her, saying that she was my sister and would not pit me, and now she said that our sisters should help each other.
I figured out that in my mother's heart, my sister was her own daughter.
And I am their hematopoietic device, their tool man.
In this life, even if I take out my heart and give them food, they still feel that it is far from enough.
17
yes. This time, my heart was completely cold.
In the end, instead of letting my sister succeed, I borrowed money to pay off the loan in advance and transferred the house to my own name.
At the same time, he officially severed his sisterhood with her.
My sister's wishful thinking fell short.
My mother blamed me for being cruel, and said that the house thing was solved, not much trouble, and tens of thousands of dollars in taxes.
She spoke lightly, as if my money had fallen from the sky.
At this point, I also saw the true face of my family.
What is a family member?
Family is united and fraternal, not jealous and hostile; family members are encouraged in the midst of loss, not falling into the well; family members are united in their hearts, not in agreement.
And in my original family, I never felt the warmth and love from my family.
From childhood to adulthood, my mother said "I am the boss", and she asked me to pay a steady stream.
What they don't know until now is that I often dream of my parents treating me differently without principle, and I cry.
I am 34 years old, and I still don't refuse the unreasonable requests of my family, and I always try to be filial and please my parents.
But what do you end up with?
Being used as a cash machine by my parents and sisters, treating my home as their own, calculating again and again, pushing me into despair again and again.
18
This time, instead of forcing my parents to take sides, I sent them back to their hometown.
As for my sister, the moment the house was over, my only involvement with her was over.
It is said that because she was unable to buy a house, her new boyfriend also parted ways with her.
I don't want to say that we are all right from now on, I just want to say that in the next life, we will never reincarnate into the same home again.
Blood is not synonymous with love and home.
People who love you, understand you, understand you, and treat you well are the family.
Despite the hardships, I was glad that I had finally bid farewell to my blood-sucking family of origin, my poisonous sister, and stopped begging for food.
For the rest of my life, I just want to live for myself and my little family.