丨This article was first published in the Pippi movie
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The news these days is really angry to see from it:
"Gao Jiaxin, a 2014 student at a university in Guangzhou, secretly photographed and harassed and humiliated female classmates in the same class."
"Sexually assaulted the underage daughter for three years and unveiled the 'painted skin' of the president's father."
No matter how many things happen and how much attention they attract, it is still very hard to be a girl.
When a girl is still in her mother's belly, she may be shed because she is a girl.
When a girl sleeps alone at home at the age of seven, she may be sexually assaulted, physically battered, and live with a poop bag for the rest of her life because she is a girl.
When a girl is 14 years old, she will be sexually abused by her own adoptive father, or even her father, and live in the shadows for life because she is a girl.
When a girl enters high school or college, the male classmates in the same class will harass and insult for no reason because she is a girl.
When a girl goes to work, cameras may be installed in the company toilet, and the lewd male colleague will even do something to her cup because she is a girl.
Got married? What about having a baby? Would it be better?
The above are all tangible injuries, and the larger, broader and more thorough invisible injuries are almost every moment in a girl's upbringing.
Is it possible to survive the family conditions? Is it possible that the objective conditions are optimal and carefree?
The movie we're going to talk about today will give us the answer —
"Kim Ji-young, born in 1982"
With nearly 300,000 people watching it, the South Korean film has a Douban rating of 8.6.
Just from the title, you know that this is a film about women.
Kim Ji-young, which is a very, very common name in South Korea, is the Chinese equivalent of Jang Jing (no offense intended).
So what happened to her may be the case of every girl, and her pain may also be the pain of every girl.
On the surface, Jin Zhiying seems to be the girl who has reached the best in all objective conditions.
There is a gentle and considerate mother, a sister who has been crazy for feminism, and a brother who is relatively sensible under the education of her sister.
After marriage, his husband was also gentle and considerate, always thinking about his wife as much as he could.
The two had a cute baby girl.
In our imagination, this should be the happiest family of three.
But Kim Ji-young is sick, she suffers from schizophrenia, and often speaks in the tone of others, as if she is "possessed".
The first time was at her mother-in-law's house, and Zhiying suddenly spoke to her mother-in-law in her mother's tone.
Before that, she was like a gyroscope going around the house and her in-laws' house.
Every day, there is no end to the housework, but also to take care of the crying children.
The mother-in-law gives orders like a leader assigns tasks.
The in-laws are happy and harmonious, and Zhiying, who is busy in the kitchen, is like a hired nanny.
The husband couldn't see it anymore and wanted to help, and before he could do anything, the mother-in-law was already yin and yang.
It's not an occasional, nor a day, it's the life of many women.
Like Chantel Ackermann's famous Jeanne Dillmann, this day-to-day repetition and mechanics is suffocating and deadly.
Get up at a fixed time every day, make the bed, make breakfast, tell the child to get up to eat, wash the dishes, buy vegetables, make lunch, wash the dishes, clean, make dinner, finish eating with the child, knit sweaters, wash, sleep.
Like something, like a robot, like a puppet, but not like a person.
In those blank and unfillable time, Zhiying recalled the past.
When she graduated in her early 20s, she was also a spirited, walking and energetic girl, with a smooth job and excellent performance.
But there is no way to get promoted.
Why?
Because she's a woman.
So how did this female leader rise up?
For example, in a meeting, Zhiying was observed as an assistant.
At first, a group of middle-aged men made all kinds of jokes, and the words satirized the female leader who disregarded the family and was not a "good mother" or "good wife".
The female leader put up with it lightly to avoid causing greater contradictions.
As an enterprising woman, the female leader actually bears great pressure and pain under the tough appearance.
Her professional success comes at the expense of her family.
At that time, Zhiying was still young, full of strength and self-confidence like the flower bud that was determined to declare war on spring in March, and she wanted to be a professional woman like a female leader.
But it backfired.
At the initiative of her husband, Zhiying gave birth to a child.
Interestingly, even if Zhiying's husband can't do his best, he is at least loving Zhiying with all his body and mind.
Even so, he still thought that women had children as simple as going out on the street to buy a potato.
His thinking could not be miscalculated, because this was the most terrible "habituation", which had always been the case anyway, and everyone was like this anyway.
So Lu Xun's words are very deafening here: "It has always been like this, right?" ”
Take a look at Kim's surroundings and you'll know how terrifying "it's always been."
When Zhiying was a child, because she laughed loudly with her sister in the room, she was told by her relatives that she was "not like a girl" and asked them to come out to help cook.
Zhiying was tailed when she went to a farther cram school, and her father said that she "had a skirt that was too short" and "smiled whenever she was a person".
Take the child out to breathe, and the gossip will reach the ears.
Zhiying's sister took the "exposure maniac" to the police station when she went to school, and instead of being praised, she was criticized by the teacher. The reason is: as a girl, there is no shame.
Zhiying's former colleague's company security guard monitored the women's toilet, and the male colleague found that not only did not remind them but privately discussed the spread.
This is the invisible, ubiquitous, ever-so big environment.
People are so accustomed to it that sometimes women become accomplices in the oppression of the same sex.
For example, Zhiying's mother-in-law obviously experienced the same pain and complaints herself, but she is still torturing Zhiying.
For example, the young lady in the café, like she will not get married and have children in the future, laughs at Zhiying as a "mother worm".
For example, those patriarchal relatives seem to have forgotten the fact that they are women.
But it is undeniable that the only people who can really help women are women themselves.
Because men can never empathize, even if he's a feminist.
Just like Zhiying's husband in the film, no matter how much he wants Zhiying to be happy, he still can't grasp the real source of the problem.
In the movie, there are also plots where women help each other.
The female leader immediately offered her a position after Zhiying decided to work, and even if Zhiying repeatedly appeared in the situation, she was extremely patient and did not get bored.
The female psychological counselor gave Zhiying enough support, comfort and encouragement when she fell into pain and confusion.
Zhiying's female colleagues also come to visit Zhiying from time to time to help her get out of the haze.
Zhiying's mother, after hearing that Zhiying was ill, immediately decided to close the family shop and help Zhiying with the child and let her do what she wanted to do.
This is the mother, who is willing to sacrifice her life for her children and is always ready.
Women's mutual help is essential, but a healthy feminist idea is not to weaken or belittle men, but to live in harmony with men.
After the right communication and communication, the vast majority of men are willing to make changes.
Zhiying's husband, although he does not understand his wife's pain, is really trying to help her.
Help her with housework, be willing to take parental leave to take children to let Zhiying go to work, suggest that Zhiying receive professional psychological counseling, and communicate with Zhiying's family...
Zhiying's father, he is undoubtedly a representative of son preference. On a business trip to England, he bought a valuable fountain pen for his only son, but only brought a notebook for each of his two daughters, and he also called it "British Notebook".
Zhiying likes to eat cream cake, which he never remembers; his son likes to eat red bean bread, he remembers it clearly, and often buys it at home.
The unit distributed free tonics, only thinking of asking for a box for his son with sound limbs, and did not notice that Zhiying was in extreme pain.
But after Zhiying's mother was angry with him, he was silent, and then he took advantage of the fact that no one was there, and sent Zhiying a box of tonics.
There is also Zhiying's younger brother, who brought her food after learning that her sister was sick, and also gave Zhiying the pen that his father gave him, and said that he would remember to buy her a cream cake in the future.
"Jin Zhiying born in 1982" is an excellent film about the plight of women, which not only shows the plight and various discrimination experienced by women, but also points out the way out - women help each other, men and women communicate.
But the film isn't very good because it's still compromising.
Zhiying finally became a writer and published a book - isn't this still a little bit of a thing at home with children?
Moreover, the content of the book is about Zhiying's children, which undoubtedly deepens the concept that "women's mission is to have children and be a good wife".
The most disappointing thing was Zhiying's words in the café to the person who called her "Mother Bug"—if it was barely a counterattack.
What does mean? The term was originally used to describe young mothers who could not discipline loud and noisy young children, but in modern society, it has obviously been used to demean full-time mothers who have no income, rely solely on their husbands, and stay at home with their children.
Is this stigmatizing word rebuttalable with the phrase "don't you know how I can evaluate me"?
It's too weak.
Something more ironic happens outside of the film.
Irene, the captain of the South Korean girl group Red Velvet, was insulted by some male fans for recommending the original book of the film at the signing party, and even burned and tore up her photos and posters to vent her anger.
Actors Zheng Yumei and Kong Liu were attacked by a year-long Internet storm because they decided to participate in this movie.
After the film was released in South Korea, the reviews were so polarized that female audiences gave the film an average score of 9.50, while male audiences gave it a rating of only 2.84.
In the end, we can only use the opening sentence of the original book as our distant but worth fighting for.
I sincerely hope that every daughter in the world can embrace a bigger and more unlimited dream.
And on the road of dreams, it doesn't matter whose daughter you are, whose wife, whose mother you are.
You have to be yourself first.
Text/Pippi Film Editorial Department: Tong Yunxi
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