47-year-old Jia Jingwen has another happy event!
Not long ago, with the movie "Waterfall", she took the title of "Golden Horse Award Queen" into her pocket and made her career reach the peak again.
At the same time, "fighting four children" has also been rumored to be boiling.
This is because some time ago, Jia Jingwen's husband Xiu Jiekai said on the show that if he could, he still wanted to have another child.
Coupled with Jia Jingwen's post "Temporarily can't drink this bottle of wine" when she celebrates Xiu Jiekai's birthday, it makes the public speculate that this is fighting for four children.
Jia Jingwen can only respond helplessly to this: just because the wine is very expensive, I have already given birth to three children, can you let me go? I have contributed to society. ”
In fact, whether it is Xiu Jiekai's speech or the various speculations of the media, it is not difficult to see:
Even such an excellent and successful woman, in the case of having three children, will still not be able to escape the "birth".
This is still true of celebrities, let alone ordinary women.
But no matter how indignant we are, the right to be born or not to be born is in the hands of both husband and wife.
Only behind this, there is a more brutal reality:
For the most part, women do not have the right to determine their reproductive rights.
Women do not have reproductive rights
Whether unmarried, married, childless, married and childless, as long as it is a woman, it may be installed:
Not having children (not having a second, third, fourth) is a failed woman.
Yang Liping, a national first-class dancer, is known as China's "Peacock Princess" by the world.
But even a princess cannot escape the criticism of childbirth.
Standing on the stage, she is confident and charming, and her whole body is shining.
But many people can't see this at all, only see that she "doesn't have children." ”
There is such a high praise comment under Yang Liping's social networking site: A woman's biggest failure is not to have a child.
This is the bystander's definition of a "childless" woman.
In the "Goodbye Lover" variety show, there is a clip in which female guest Tong Chenjie is "besieged" to promote.
Tong Chenjie's mother and mother-in-law expressed their views of looking forward to "grandchildren" and "grandchildren" from their respective perspectives.
The attitude is very euphemistic, but very determined.
During the conversation, the mother-in-law came up with this sentence:
Hope you bring "hope" to our home;
If this family of yours is broken because you don't have children, is it worth it?
During the conversation, a "horned trend" was formed - the mother, mother-in-law and husband formed an alliance, all of which advised her to have children.
And Tong Chenjie suddenly became the isolated side, guarding the position that he did not want children.
It is the emotional bondage of family members to "married, childless and childless" women.
But is it good to be born? Not enough for families who value continuation!
No, no, no, no,
Some time ago, a divorce lawsuit in Guangzhou was on Weibo's hot search.
Ms. Ye, 41, and her husband have a daughter together, and due to physical reasons, Ms. Ye has no intention of having a second child.
But her husband kept pushing her around and threatening her:
If he did not have a second child, he would divorce, and in the future, he would no longer raise his daughter, nor would he contribute to the family, and he would have to get back the salary card that he had previously placed in Ms. Ye.
Ms. Ye had no choice but to file a divorce lawsuit with the court.
This is the coercion of the partner to women who are "married and have children and do not want to have a second child".
So you see, not having a baby is a failure, having a child without having a second child is a sinner, you have the womb, but you don't have the right to procreate.
But more realistically: you don't have reproductive rights, but you have to risk your life.
Procreation > life
The director of the documentary "Shengmen" once said:
"It is said that childbirth is a matter of two people, a matter of husband and wife, but it is not.
It is the woman who really faces everything. ”
Not long ago, when a mother in Shandong gave birth to a third child, the child unfortunately died in the hospital.
Afterwards, her husband and family made a big fuss at the hospital and claimed 2 million.
But the truth is that the doctor has repeatedly orally recommended caesarean section and issued two written notices.
The husband signed it and refused.
The wife on the delivery bed experienced a long smooth birth and could not be born.
The child's fetal heart is only seventy or eighty, and the situation is very critical.
In the end, it was the pregnant woman who proposed the caesarean section herself, and the child was born smoothly, but because the delay was too long, the fetus was suffocated and could not be rescued.
Mothers who have lost their children cry bitterly in their hospital beds, and people are heart-wrenching to hear.
At the age of 33, she had 5 miscarriages before giving birth to 2 children, and now, the child who is pregnant in October is not easy to give birth, but she is forever separated.
And why insist on letting the wife have a smooth birth?
"Isn't it now advocating vaginal births?" I can't go down and cut it again.
The two previous births were normal births, and this time it must be possible.
It has been used for a long time before, and you can stick to it again.
Regarding the risks, I don't understand, and even if I don't agree, the doctor has the responsibility and obligation to keep the child safe. ”
Without understanding a word, he transferred the responsibility to the hospital.
It is ignorance, it is ignorance, and it is even more important not to take the life of the wife seriously.
The door of the delivery room, separated by life and death, can also best illuminate the naked human heart and human nature.
Giving birth to a child is never just lying in the hospital and the child comes out.
Pain and risk, worry and fear, can only be known through experience, and these risks need to be digested and borne by women.
Not to mention the various parenting pressures and workplace pressures that women will face after giving birth...
Of course, the examples listed above are individual and minority, and do not represent more people and ordinary people.
In fact, when writing this article, the bacteria are very nervous, after all, it is too negative.
But then I think about it, not saying no sound will not make this phenomenon disappear, it is a fact of reality.
Bacteria often say please give the reproductive rights back to both husband and wife, and now they want to say, please give the reproductive rights back to the woman.
Every time you give birth or not, you want to comply with:
Women's true will, women's true voices.
Not coerced by others, not coerced by words, not kidnapped by partners' emotions.