Wen Shu Ren Jing
Linshui Zhaohua is a portrayal of Zhang Ailing, a talented woman in the Republic of China.
She is indeed a flower blooming out of the dust, with a pot of incense crumbs. In her lack of warmth, she was just silently waiting for the man who understood her. The world knows that there is an unconcealed desolate background in her writing, which is actually the trauma brought to her by her original family.
In the uproar of the "Iron Chain Woman" in Feng County, Jiangsu Province, and the "Iron Cage Girl" in Jia County, it is difficult to imagine that this famous Talented Woman of the Republic of China once also did the "Iron Cage Woman".
When Zhang Ailing was young, her parents eventually parted ways due to the difference in life interests and life pursuits, her mother Huang Suqiong angrily went abroad to stay in the West, and her father Zhang Zhiyi soon remarried. Later, when she reached her teens, her mother said she would take this talented daughter abroad for further study. In this regard, Zhang Zhiyi, who is conservative in his thinking and does not want to make progress, resolutely opposes it, and when he thinks of his daughter going to his ex-wife's way, he is naturally very angry, he not only resents Huang Suqiong's ran away from home, but now she actually wants to take her beloved daughter away, which is something he cannot tolerate, so this man who can't even keep his wife will vent all his resentment against his ex-wife on the young girl Zhang Ailing.
Zhang Ailing was severely beaten by her father, and then she was imprisoned in a hut under the Zhang family, but at this time, Zhang Ailing suffered from dysentery again, her body was very weak, and she almost died.
Zhang Zhiyi, the husband of the nest, indulges in the pleasures of the little left all day, swallowing clouds and spitting mist is a dark net he has created for the family, a decadent man who eats his ancestral property and smokes a lot, and is doomed to become a good father. Zhang Zhiyi made an iron heart to imprison his daughter, and he not only did not ask for a doctor, but also did not give Zhang Ailing medicine. In this way, she lay in the dark hut for half a year before she found an opportunity to escape. The experience of being beaten and imprisoned this time remained in Zhang Ailing's life and became a painful memory that could not be erased for life. Zhang Ailing's beating by her father directly led to her break with the family and escaped from the small black room, so far, Zhang Ailing and the Zhang family's kindness and righteousness have all been severed.
Fortunately for the "Chain Girl" of Bifeng County, Zhang Ailing has the wisdom and courage to escape. Since then, there has been one more literary female writer in this world, and one less female madman who is chained.
The writer's works always project a mirror image of life, and in the novel "Jasmine Piece", Zhang Ailing describes the memory that tormented her. The family misfortune of the protagonist Nie Chuanqing, as well as his being deafened by his father and abused by his stepmother, are all Zhang Ailing's personal experiences.
And her other autobiographical novel "Leifeng Pagoda", Leifeng Pagoda represents the meaning of imprisoning women, but also has symbolic significance, just like the patriarchal and feudal era, alluding to her experience of being imprisoned by her father and stepmother in her childhood to escape and run to her mother, like the "white lady" in the tower to get a new life.
"Life is a gorgeous robe, full of fleas" This classic quote was written by Zhang Ailing at the age of 19. At that time, people were just amazed at how a young girl had such a transparent perception and symbol of life, but unexpectedly it became a portrayal of her life.
When she was only 4 years old, her parents divorced, and maternal love has since become a dream she longs for but is difficult to reach, and the appearance of her stepmother is the beginning of her nightmare, she can only wear her stepmother's cotton robe like ground beef, and the fat and worn cotton robe hides her girlish dreams.
And what makes us most emotional is that Zhang Ailing's old age is still desolate, there is no fixed place, often sad about where to stay overnight, and even worried about a meal, and must not be as confident as Woolf to declare to the world: if a woman wants to write a novel, then she must have two things, the same is money, the other is a room of her own. If she didn't have her own house, she had to keep moving, and every time she went to a place, she felt that there were worms in this place, and there were worms in her hair, so she desperately cut her hair and kept moving. In her later years, she continued to struggle with fleas, died in Los Angeles, and died for several days before being discovered.
Sadly, Zhang Ailing seems to be homeless in life and spirit. In the end, all her royalties and fees would rather be given to friends and publishers than to any of her relatives. In fact, from the moment her mother ran away, from the moment her father beat and imprisoned her, family affection was already dead in her desolate heart!
Zhang Ailing said that she did not like to be magnificent, and preferred desolation to sadness. The reason why the desolation has a deeper and longer aftertaste is because it is like green and peach, which is a jagged contrast. In Zhang Ailing's literary world, the love between men and women is exactly that green and pink, which is described by her thoroughly, but she is hopelessly confused in her own real emotional world.
Meeting Hu Lancheng is the robbery of Zhang Ailing's life, and it can be said that she put herself into another invisible "iron cage".
Zhang Ailing said soberly: "Aren't people who marry for love the same stupid as people who put clouds in a jar?" But she will be caught up in the sweet words of the veteran of the love scene. However, how can a marriage book that "the world is stable and the years are quiet" be closed to the spring colors of the garden full of joy and pleasure? The man who thought he would always be a flower, his heart was full of spring, he had never stopped looking for flowers and asking for willows, and he did not let go of any women who could be approached in his life. This kind of indulgent man is destined not to fall in love with any woman.
In the face of love, women are always seeking a sense of belonging and satisfaction, especially for a woman like Zhang Ailing, who has lacked love since childhood, she needs to have a stable support. Objectively speaking, in addition to the male and female love and skin kissing between Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng, there is also a sense of confidant between the literati. However, due to the difference in thinking and personality between men and women, in the treatment of love, it is also very different, men do not have a future without the present, women do not have a future - for this reason, men are loved by sex, and women are loved by love. It is safe to say that in contrast to Hu Lancheng's hunting color, Zhang Ailing pays more attention to the encounter and acquaintance of the soul.
For more than a year, Rao was simply lacking in love, and it was enough for Zhang Ailing to recognize the true face of a man's Lushan. She resolutely withdrew from the "iron cage" of Hu Lancheng's feelings and paid the other party 300,000 yuan for the last time. This amount was a large amount at the time, why did Zhang Ailing have to pay this breakup fee? I have always wondered, is she in order to break up more thoroughly, a one-time "buyout" of feelings, or deep love still in the heart, willing to use a large amount of money to subsidize him? After all, we are not Zhang Ailing, and the reason for this is ultimately unknown. But in fact, Hu Lancheng actually accepted it with peace of mind. And it can be seen that he has accepted Zhang Ailing's money more than once. This mouth spitting out lotus flowers, it is easy to use Jia Baoyu's spirit to compare himself, and even advertises himself as a "golden boy" flower heart man, the bone and blood inside are worse than Ximen Qing. Looking at the full text of "Jin Ping Mei", Ximen Qing at least did not treat a woman who was good friends with him. At this point, we have completely seen the nature of this scumbag, who is not only completely scummy, but also eats soft and hard food without any bottom line. Fortunately, Zhang Ailing once again broke free of the tender "iron cage".
Zhang Ailing said: "I keep licking the wound, licking and licking the wound and feeling for the wound. It was this wound that accompanied her throughout her life, repeated in her writings. It is really sad to say, she has not found an antidote in her life, and the heart-rending lungs that cannot make a sound will eventually follow her to the end of the barren world.
On the afternoon of March 3, 2022
Ren Jing is the author of the essay collection "Sleep with Your Name", "Want a Mountain", the novel "Floating Life", "Quenching", and has published more than 3 million words of poetry, prose, and short stories.