Countless parents hope to send their children to the best schools, receive the best education, and do their best to create the best educational environment for their children.
But it is often overlooked that parents are the best teachers for children.
Every word and deed of parents is to set an example for their children, and every detail in family life is actually not a subsection.
Many times, in order to protect their children and avoid injuries, parents will make many transgressive behaviors.
As everyone knows, such behavior has caused harm to the growth of children.
01
Parents are thrifty and thrifty, and children are generous
Parents themselves shrink their own food and clothing, but they unconditionally meet their children's requirements.
You think it's a sign of loving children, but it's not.
Indulging children in money is likely to make them learn luxury, do not know how to reciprocate, do not know how to manage money.
Loving children does not mean giving him the most expensive, the most important thing is the right fit.
Teaching children to manage money from an early age, knowing how to be grateful and rewarding, and truly understanding the principle of frugality is the best gift for children.
02
Parents are not polite, children have a kind of learning
In life, when parents get along with others, if they often behave impolitely, children will learn from them.
For example, the use of words between parents is not polite, children will be rude to both sides, parents are not polite to elders, and children will learn the way parents treat them in their eyes.
Once a child develops the habit of being rude, it will affect his interpersonal relationships, academics, and career development, and make them miss many opportunities.
On weekdays, parents should examine their own words and deeds and be a civilized and polite person.
Teaching by example is two inseparable parts.
03
Watching TV shows is not graded, and children are easy to learn badly
Watching TV with children, this scene appears in almost every family.
In order to save trouble, many parents will take their children to watch adult programs together, but they ignore a problem:
A lot of adult shows aren't for kids.
Some programs are easy for children to have wrong cognition, and the child's eye development is not yet complete, and parents watch TV for a long time, radiation, strong visual and auditory stimulation will also hurt the child, and may also cause bone development such as cervical spine.
We must realize that to show your child a program or play on a computer, you must follow your child's developmental habits. Make sure your child is exposed to positive and healthy content.
And do a good job of time planning in advance, do not exceed the specified length of time.
If you are worried that your child is bored, you can try to use parent-child games to divert your child's attention.
04
Comparing children with others, children are getting worse and worse
In family education, the most common phenomenon should be compared with children.
Many parents feel that through comparison, they can stimulate their children's greater potential, which is actually wrong.
Comparing children, children do not necessarily have a competitive mentality, but also may have a sense of failure and guilt.
These two feelings will make children lose self-confidence and become inferior, which will not only affect the relationship between parents and children, but also encounter walls everywhere in children's future learning work.
The most correct thing to do is not to measure your own children by the standards of other people's children.
Each child's talent and personality are different, and the development trajectory is naturally different, so there is no need to force a comparison.
Let the child develop naturally, as long as there is no lag, slow phenomenon, do not worry too much.
05
Overprotection of children, children become "giant babies"
There are no parents in the world who do not love their children, and from the moment the child is born, the parents are worried that they will be hurt by the outside world.
I was afraid to melt in my mouth, and I was afraid of falling in my hand.
Distressed children will suffer losses and will not let them do anything.
While preferring children, they also deprive children of the opportunity to do it, so that they lack the process of learning and cannot exercise.
Without the tempering of life, it is difficult for children to learn the skills of taking care of themselves, and over time, they will form a habit of dependence and eventually become a "lazy" child.
When he went out of society, it was difficult to get along with others and could not adapt to the collective life.
Therefore, in life, we have to give children some opportunities for autonomy.
Within the scope of the child's ability, assign them some things, let them understand the truth that paying is rewarding, and let them learn the ability they should have. Hands-on children are the most effective way to learn.
06
Tantrums in front of children are prone to extremes
What kind of environment, what kind of children are created.
Parents who love to lose their temper are taught that their children are prone to rebellion, suspicious and sensitive, fragile and aggressive.
When the child grows up, he is also very grumpy and harsh, and he is likely to have a perverted and neurotic tendency.
Children will inherit the bad temper of their parents and have a situation of "venting hurt and copying violence".
At this time, the next generation of young children have become victims of bad tempers.
Therefore, we should try to avoid venting our temper in front of our children, and we can talk to our children with a fair attitude and discuss things on the facts.
Tell them that there are bad things in their lives, and take the opportunity to teach them some survival experiences.
Try to give your child a more positive impression, and when he encounters something similar, he will not blindly vent his temper, but look for a solution.
07
Parents often lie, and children are difficult to be sincere
Children are the innocentst and smartest people in the world, and your lies are not ignorant of them, but powerless.
Children lie for a long time, and they become part of the lie.
Treat your children as equals to yourself! Don't fool them with words because they're still young, and don't lay a world of lies for them because they know less.
In this way, children will also feel that there is nothing wrong with lying, and they will probably learn to lie as well.
Children's trust is precious, parents can not perfunctory children, promise children things must be done.
Whether the child is present or not, please be a person of integrity.
08
Parents procrastinate, and children have no concept of time
Some parents themselves are very abrasive in life, agreeing to go out with their children at 8 o'clock, but they always delay until 9 o'clock.
I usually spend time with friends and family, and I never arrive on time.
Parents' unpunctual behavior, children will see in the eyes, over time, they will also become no time view.
It is believed that the adverse events of not being punctual and late are just small things, and it is likely that similar problems as parents will occur in the future.
Parents should establish their children's view of time from an early age and let them understand the importance of time.
Usually do things must be carried out according to the plan, strictly according to the prescribed time to complete, do not always think about "coming to Japan for a long time", time has passed.
09
If you don't follow the traffic rules, your child's safety is threatened
In order to save trouble, adults often do not obey the traffic rules when traveling, take advantage of the fact that no one runs a red light, turn in places where they cannot turn, and in order to save a little time, take the children to take risks.
Doing so will only make the child's safety awareness become weak, and it will also lack self-protection awareness, whether it is going out or at home, it is easy to encounter danger.
Parents try to worry about it for a while, but what affects the child's life is affected.
So, be sure to make a change.
Whether you go out with or without children, please follow the traffic rules.
Usually at home, it is important to give children more science to obey traffic rules.
Let them understand that by following the rules, they are protecting themselves.
10
Criticize the child in public, and the child is full of resentment in his heart
Many times as soon as a child makes a mistake, parents will not distinguish between the occasion and the time, directly teach the child in public, thinking that this can make the child remember deeply and no longer fall in the same place.
In fact, such education is not only not conducive to children to clarify their mistakes, but also has a more far-reaching adverse impact on children.
Children being criticized in public will not only hurt the child's self-esteem, make the child feel inferior, but also affect the emotions between the children, and they cannot realize their mistakes.
As the saying goes: if you know your mistakes, you can change them, and you can do a good job.
Adults often make mistakes, let alone young children.
When a child makes a mistake, what is needed is to point it out in time and the attitude must be gentle.
Tell him what is wrong, the purpose of criticism is not to hit them, but to make them correct, not to put the cart before the horse.
11
Parents do not love sports, and the child's health is also poor
Around us, there are often such parents who spend two days on the weekend either in front of the TV or in front of the computer.
There are also some parents who are keen to take their children during the two days of the weekend, running to various interest classes, and whether the children are really interested or not, they always feel that the children will become mature by throwing in money and time.
It is rare for parents who love sports and value their physical health.
Therefore, our children love sports, and it is rare to pay attention to their physical health.
A child's lack of exercise can cause certain skills to lag behind, so changes must be made.
More exercise is beneficial to themselves and children, usually try to take time with children to do some sports and games, both exercise and cultivate parent-child feelings.
Many times, every move, every word and deed of parents will be subtly imprinted in the child's mind, affecting the child's key choices on the road to the future, and ultimately affecting their fate.
If you want your child to become a literate person, you must first become a literate person.
No matter how good the famous school is, it is not as good as the words and deeds of parents to their children.