Author: Evan
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Over the years, everything Wu Qili has experienced is more bloody than any TVB drama.
"At that time, I was very helpless, called him, found that his mobile phone changed numbers, I was very angry, I told him through a friend, I will not look for you again." Really, until now, I haven't contacted him again..."
"Every time I took money from my mother, she spread the bills all over the floor and made me pick them up on my knees, and my daughter watched from the side..."
"Half a year before leaving Shanghai, my mother would run into the room in the middle of the night, lose her temper with me, and force me to find her father with a kitchen knife. When she was in a hurry, she took a knife and slashed everywhere, chopping up the kitchen table, and I hugged my daughter in the corner and shivered..."
First, no one is God and can judge others
Unexpectedly, Wu Qili would be the last guest recorded before the stop of the talk show "Night Talk" that I was responsible for producing, and the first guest recorded by the celebrity escort reality show "Surprise Journey".
I first met Wu Qili because of my relationship as a producer of "Night Talk", and invited her to the show through her friend Li Chun'en. At that time, when she was interviewed by the media, an inadvertent sentence "there are too many rural areas in the mainland" triggered countless spit from netizens. In that episode, in addition to responding to the controversy caused by the remarks, she also recalled the details of her candidacy for YaJie, the emotional entanglement with Jackie Chan, and the "parenting experience" of raising Xiaolong alone. Li Chun'en said on the show that her personality is a "silly big sister", and she also described herself as "either standing or dying", never twisting and pinching, dragging mud and water. After the recording, we had a light meal together at a tea restaurant near the company's studio, so we had more opportunities to communicate.
The second invitation to Wu Qili on "Night Talk" coincided with the "female abuse incident" that detonated the entertainment circle, and she had just returned home from the police station. When she drove near the studio herself, a few minutes late to the agreed time, I found a colleague to help her park. After the meeting, she kept saying sorry. I thought she was on the cusp of the storm this time she would wear a pair of sunglasses or something. As a result, just like the first time we met, a slightly haggard woman appeared without applying her fat powder. The program team had a professional makeup artist, but insisted on putting on their own makeup, which only took five or six minutes, which was the fastest female guest I had ever seen.
This time, we added WeChat to each other, and after that, we would occasionally see the circle of friends she sent, occasionally like it, and comment on a few words. About half a year later, on October 23 last year, she learned from the state of her circle of friends that her mother had died. I called her to comfort her and asked her to mourn.
One night in November last year, a stranger suddenly added me on WeChat, and because of the relationship between doing media work, there were often unknown people who asked to add WeChat, and they passed without much thought. But this person didn't even say hello, but asked me a strange question: Do you know Wu Qili herself? I thought it was a peer and wanted to contact me through what I wanted to contact. I said: Know, who are you?
The stranger said: I am the son of a mother who died for her biological mother, Zheng Liming, and her mother died, and she herself did not want to come. In the end her mother starved to death, even though my mother let her eat white food at the hotel.
I saw these words in the clouds, but instead of arousing my voyeuristic desire to probe further, I was a little disgusted. I said: I'm sorry, this is someone else's family affair, I have no desire to know, and I also recommend that you do not interfere in other people's affairs in the name of morality.
The boy stressed: The mother-in-law secretly stuffed food into her bag when she used the buffet in the morning, and then did not come down to eat for two or three days, she would rather eat white food three times a day.
I replied: You are not a party to these things, and from different angles, you only see a one-sided aspect and do not understand the whole thing. No one is God and can judge others.
The boy said: I have found a reporter from so-and-so Weekly, and I have made an appointment to come to the interview, and I am going to poke these things out. That's all I have to say.
I typed a line: "Thank you for informing, may you have a good life, joy and peace." "When I sent it out, I found that the other party had deleted me."
When writing this article, I checked the boy's WeChat information again, and unexpectedly I could see the last ten circle of friends status displayed in the photo album: the boy was about thirteen or fourteen years old, with clear eyes, wearing black-rimmed glasses, Sven's, like to watch movies, play electric, and after the test, he would also bump into the car in the middle of the night... Was it one of thousands of ordinary kids, even a bit like the time I was a teenager? So love is uneven, so righteous.
Later, I had the opportunity to have a deep conversation with Wu Qili, which made me reacquaint myself with her.
Second, either don't love, or love to the point of crushing bones
A friend who was doing publishing wanted to plan a book about Wu Qili, and he approached me and asked me to talk to Wu Qili herself. I have always been helpful, if this book can help Wu Qili, but also can help friends, why not.
We made an appointment for dinner at a restaurant near her residence by the sea, which was some distance from the city, there were not many people, and hong Kong in December had begun to get cold, so we chose an outdoor corner to sit down and eat and talk. She lit a cigarette and smoked it, and these days, her mother's afterthought made her feel tired and upset. When the mother died, she did not leave any wills, all the documents were lost, and only a copy of the ID card was left. All the cumbersome procedures require her to do it herself.
After returning to Hong Kong from Shanghai in 2012, Wu had not seen her mother for four years. Usually, except for sending living expenses to my mother through my uncle, there is basically no contact. "My mom is 71 years old and she didn't leave because of any serious illness, she was wrestling with me. About three weeks before she left, the old man fell and fractured his bones. My uncle called the emergency and told her to go to the hospital, and the ambulance had arrived, and she just wouldn't go. Probably there was a blood clot on the body, and the blood clot ran in the blood vessels to the lungs and blocked, so it was gone. ”
What kind of awkwardness makes this mother and daughter want to entangle with their own lives? Wu said her mother influenced her almost her entire life.
When Wu Qili was one year old, her mother divorced her father. After understanding things, she learned that her mother did not love her father, and she was married because of the relationship in the family. Later, her mother once said to her: "Fortunately, you are a girl, if you are a boy, I will not want you." Because Wu Qili looks very similar to her father, her mother's friends come to the house and see her and always say: "Zheng Liming, you divorced your husband and had a child that looks exactly the same, it is really miserable." She sat next to her and listened to something like that in her ears every day.
The mother's personality is too strange, and the difference from other people's mothers is too great. It's almost impossible to find a second mother who says something about her daughter: "No one wants you to make chickens." "Since she was a child, she grew up listening to such words. One or two aunts even asked her, are you born to your mother? She said that about you.
After growing up, her mother's "influence" on Wu Qili did not stop. After winning the "Asian Sister" championship in 1990, she had several boyfriends, "Strictly speaking, there are two men who can get married, but my mother just brainwashed me and told me not to get married." She began to feel strange, a normal mother, will hope that her daughter to find someone to marry, how can her mother tell her not to get married? My mother even told everyone around her not to marry Elaine (Wu Qili's English name), or even to mention the word marriage in front of her.
Later, Wu Qili met "that gentleman" - Jackie Chan. When she was 18 years old, he had pursued her, but she did not have a good feeling for him at that time. At that time, her boyfriend was one of the most famous advertising directors in Hong Kong, returning from studying in the United States, very learned and very tasteful, and Jackie Chan, who had not read a book, drove a very dirty car, and was completely an upstart look.
At that time, only the Tao was commonplace, and looking back, Wu Qili felt as if everything was destined. Going around, she could not escape some people and certain things in this life. A few years later, she met him again. At that time, her boyfriend was an executive of Jiahe Film Company, and the boss of Jiahe was Jackie Chan's father, and every weekend, there would be a party at the home of Jiahe's boss, where they would always meet.
There are so many beautiful men in the world, why would they meet him again? Why was I with him? When the eldest brother pursued Miss Wu's good intentions and powerful offensive, even if she was replaced by any other woman in the world, I am afraid that she will be doomed:
After filming, he immediately called her and said, waiting for you to eat, so the whole crew is waiting for Miss Wu, Miss Wu is not available, everyone is not allowed to eat, the whole table of dishes no one dares to move a chopstick, Miss Wu arrived, the eldest brother first clipped to her like the same;
Miss Wu filmed the TV series until two or three o'clock in the evening, a generation of kung fu superstars sat next to the car waiting, he did not ask his subordinates to send, but personally packed Miss Wu's favorite supper to wait for her to finish work, to the end of the supper to leave, and personally sent the hot breakfast in the morning;
A group of friends to Miss Wu's house to eat, others are only concerned about eating, he will go around her house, look here, look there, the next day, he will call and say, your home cabinet is broken, I asked the assistant to help you change a new, the sofa is a little old, it should also be changed...
It was the turn of the big brother's company to have a party, a hundred people, all of them were showbiz figures with heads and faces and status, she was tired, she quietly left without saying goodbye, he would nervously call her and ask her why she left so early? Then Barabala said the last pass.
Miss Wu went to Japan with the company to shoot a drama, just when her birthday arrived, he would find a colleague from the company to order flowers in Japan and send them to her room...
He didn't do it every week, he did it every day. Although he has a family, he is a wild wolf who is raised and almost never has to go home, and Christmas and Mid-Autumn Festival are almost spent with Miss Wu at miss Wu's house. She didn't know what he did to the other girls, but it was true for her that any boyfriend she had ever been in a relationship with could match. All he had done for her, so silly, so naïve, so natural, not at all deliberate and contrived, everything was frank, never hidden, never made her pimple and felt uncomfortable. Gradually, she saw the lovely side of this gentleman, and gradually, she was touched by his sincerity. In the face of love, men may be able to remain rational, but women are always so desperate, either do not love, or love to the bone. Once invested, even the moths put out the fire.
Third, if it were me, I would also wonder if your mother and daughter were united
She is young and beautiful, as soon as she enters the show business circle, she is the winner of Miss Asia, although she is a newcomer to the show business, but the friends around her are all the most famous and highest-status people in this circle. It all came too easily and too quickly, and the man's love for her, which made her, also "spoiled" her. "Yeah, why did you pour me tea?" Didn't I pour tea for you? Wu Qili looked back and thought about it, thinking that she was too bad at that time, "Although she will not be a person now, it is better than then." "Such a straight-forward personality has made her invisibly offend many people around her big brother." In fact, many people in their company don't like me, big brother, what are you doing, are you crazy? Wu Qili, what do you rely on? Hot or cold, everyone is waiting for you. If you don't come, we won't have to eat!" It doesn't matter if we serve Big Brother, why should we serve you? And then I'm not a very good talker, and that's not a dead end. ”
At that time, usually only others looked at the face of the eldest brother, but as soon as Miss Wu lost her temper and made a phone call, he would appear immediately. Until one day, she was pregnant with his child. She knew she was pregnant in Canada, and he was also filming in Canada at the time, and when he knew she was pregnant, he didn't object to her giving birth to the child.
After returning to Hong Kong alone, Wu Qili told her mother about her pregnancy. The mother told her that we are Christians, and that abortion is a very serious sin for Christians, and that abortion, regardless of the number of months of fetal life, is tantamount to breaking the fifth commandment of the Ten Commandments: "Do not kill." Therefore, for this child, from beginning to end, she never thought of giving up. It wasn't that she hadn't thought about the future consequences. However, at that time, she was confused by love.
When she was 5 months pregnant, he came to visit her and she didn't know that it would be the last time they would see each other. In September of that year, her birthday, he called her and he said, "Look I remember your birthday." She wouldn't have imagined that it would be their last call. Since the exposure of Wu Qili's pregnancy, although in order to avoid the eyes and ears of the media, she moved to change her phone, and even canceled her private mobile phone. But a large number of reporters still found her new residence, and every day there were dozens of cars and hundreds of reporters from all over the world guarding her downstairs. Everyone wants to know the answer to this question: Who is the father of the child?
A relationship is either better or bad. Wu Qili treats love and has no intermediate options. When she was six gods and no master, she called him and found that his phone had changed numbers. Miss Wu was very angry and thought he was running away, so she told "that gentleman" through a friend that I would never look for you again. Sure enough, until now, she hadn't contacted him again... Later, Miss Wu accepted an interview with the media and tacitly accepted that the father of the child was Jackie Chan.
When she was young, she didn't understand why men change, and now she understands that this is the cause and effect of many things superimposed. "Those people in his company have long been jealous of me, why is the eldest brother so good to this woman." Big brother, you are crazy, you give birth to her, what if every woman gives birth to her in the future? "Plus her mother, Zheng Liming, also did a lot of very strange things." My mom has a bad reputation, and he probably hears a lot about my mom, and he's afraid my mom will ask him for money. Nor am I helping him explain anything. If it were me, I would wonder if your mother and daughter were united for riches. ”
After becoming pregnant, Wu Qili retired from show business to help her mother take care of business. In order to let her go to the gentleman, some normal business, obviously good, was messed up by her. She would say bad things about another person in front of this person, bad things about this person in front of that person, and if she said it, the business would not go on. "She's just going to force me to run out of ground."
Fourth, she put the renminbi on the ground and told me to pick it up on my knees
After the birth of her daughter, Wu Qili moved from Hong Kong to Shanghai with her children. The mother said that she would take care of their mother and daughter, and for Wu Qili, her mother was the only relative in the world after she lost her love and protection, "I don't believe in my mother, who do I believe?" "She began to devote her energy wholeheartedly to the upbringing of her children. Her most important job every day is to drive from this end of Shanghai to the other end of Shanghai, transporting her daughter to and from school.
When she first moved to Shanghai, Wu Qili still had some savings, and after a while, she could afford to use seven or eight. "In the end, I ran out of money. My mother gives me living expenses every month, but do you know how to give it to me? Every time I asked my mother for money, she put the renminbi on the ground and told me to pick it up on my knees, and my daughter watched from the side... Then I had no choice, I had to pick it up, because I had to pay a lot of children. The floor of my house was full of marble, which really made me kneel from the hall to the room. That's how I lived those years. ”
Perhaps, from childhood to adulthood, Wu Qili grew up under the control of her mother, and when she became a mother herself, she no longer accepted control, so her mother wanted to achieve the purpose of control by torturing and punishing her. But apparently this did not work, so the mother intensified. "In the last six months before I left Shanghai, do you know how I lived?" After I locked the door, I had to put a chair on top of it, and there was a pile of things on the top of the chair, and I was afraid that my mother would run in in the middle of the night. She often lost her temper at home and forced me with a kitchen knife to find her father. When she was in a hurry, she slashed and slashed the kitchen table, and I hugged my daughter in the corner and shivered..." Later, she threw away all the knives in the house.
In 2009, Wu Qili suffered from hyperthyroidism due to excessive stress and endocrine disorders, and during that time she was secretly photographed by paparazzi and fattened.
"For me, children are not the same thing, they are not used for trading." No matter how much her mother persecuted her, no matter how difficult the day was, she never went to find "that gentleman." In Shanghai, she tried to be self-reliant, trying to get rid of her mother. She paints, does decoration, and runs the construction site like a man every day, but this money is too hard to earn.
She once fled Shanghai in order to escape the paparazzi's pursuit, but in those years in Shanghai, she was not far away from the mother and daughter. It is often filmed by paparazzi and fabricated fake news such as remarriage and pregnancy. Compared with the harm to the child by external remarks, she felt that perhaps the harm of her mother Zheng Liming was more powerful. "My mother would say something very rude to my daughter, and once scolded me in the hotel that I couldn't eat it, and really threw a pot of rice at my mother."
"When my daughter was very young, my mother said to her: Except for me, your father and your mother have no one to ask you. She would come up and ask me. My mother-in-law said you don't want me. I said, your mother accompanies you to school every day, opens her eyes and sees you, do you say this is called not you? My mom must have had a psychological problem and should see a psychiatrist. ”
Five, if it weren't for Mom, all the stories might have looked different
Wu Qili decided to flee Shanghai and return to Hong Kong, where she spent two weeks looking for a school and a house for her daughter. "All the things my mom did, I ate. As a result, I got into a fight with my mother as I am today. But whatever you do to me, enough is enough, I don't want these things to happen to my child. This may be the reaction of a normal mother who wants to protect her daughter from harm.
In order not to let Wu Qili leave Shanghai, her mother tried her best. Two weeks before leaving, she was sued in court. She learned that her mother had not paid the property management fee for a year, so the owner of the community sued the court. The people at the court said to her, if you don't take 50,000 yuan at noon today, you will have to withhold your documents. At that time, she was anxious to help her daughter find a school in Hong Kong, and if the documents were withheld, then she would not be able to leave Shanghai.
After returning to Hong Kong, Wu Qili, who has not worked for many years, has started from scratch again, in addition to supporting her family, she also has to pay for her daughter's schooling, and she also has to transfer some living expenses to her mother in Shanghai every month. Although she fled Shanghai, her mother did not let her worry about it, and always caused some accidents from time to time. In fact, the home in Hong Kong can live with the mother, but when she asked her daughter Zhuo Lin: Do you want to take your mother-in-law back to Hong Kong? The daughter lost her temper and hid and sulked, and finally told her, Mom, I don't want to live with my grandmother. Perhaps the memory of Shanghai has left too deep and deep a shadow in the child's heart.
"If it weren't for Mom, all the stories might have looked different. It should be said that my mother changed me and my daughter saved me. After experiencing these things, how can we not become strong? After saying this long story, Wu Qili smiled at me, as if everything she had just told had nothing to do with her. That means, aren't you going to write? Then I will simply tell you everything and see how you write.
At that moment, my brain was somewhat short-circuited: the amount of information today was too large, and I needed time to digest it well. There are also some details and information that I have to omit from this article in order to protect the privacy of the parties and minors. I can't imagine such a deformed mother-daughter relationship in the world. However, if the story is not like this, then all the logic is difficult to explain. It seems that only for this reason can we understand why the choices that Wu Qili has made over the years are different from ordinary people. Thinking about the relationship between many mothers and daughters in the show business circle, such as the relationship between Mei Yanfang's mother and daughter, I seem to be able to understand that sentence: the so-called parents and children are husband and wife, but they are gradually drifting apart.
The winter wind was blowing a little cold, and we got up and left the restaurant. On the way, I remembered a question and carefully asked Wu Qili: Do you hate Jackie Chan now? She didn't even think about it: Hate, why hate? Even if it is a close relationship, after knowing each other for so many years, the feelings will fade, and they will not hate to hate. Don't you think it's hard to hate someone? He doesn't know you hate him.
It turns out that the antonym of love is not hate, but forgetting.
Soon after, Wu Qili participated in the filming of our new show "Surprise Journey", and she made a cameo appearance as a star tour guide for a day, taking Liu Luoxi, a girl who traveled to Hong Kong from the mainland, for a day. Take her to the vegetable market near where she lived when she was a child, buy vegetables and go back to a friend's house to cook for the girl, take her to the beach to paint, and take her to the horse farm where her daughter Zhuolin usually trains to ride a horse to experience horseback riding. While riding a horse at the horse farm, an accident occurred, Zhuo Lin fell off his horse while practicing a jumping action, and Wu Qili, who was watching from the sidelines, was momentarily shocked and quickly asked her daughter how she was.
Her daughter has learned to ride a horse for many years, and she has never accompanied her to the horse farm, and she almost dares not watch her daughter ride a horse, because she is afraid of seeing her daughter wrestling. Zhuo Lin didn't seem to care about the fall, but felt a little humiliated, when she was chatting with the girl Liu Luoxi, in addition to talking about the incident of calling the police last year, she also talked about a small matter of mother-daughter relationship: one day, she was in a very bad mood, her mother walked in and touched her head, and said to her: It's OK. That sentence gave her a lot of warmth and comfort.
Yes, it's no big deal, for Wu Qili, everything is over. In January 2016, she put down everything on her hands, took a long vacation, took a long train back to Shanghai alone to take care of the aftermath of her mother Zheng Liming, did not know when it began, she was afraid of flying, and at a certain stage in her past, every night she would dream of taking a plane falling from the sky. This feeling, perhaps, is just like when she was in the middle of the day, the collective judgment of the world on her, let her fall from the sky to the bottom.
I suddenly remembered the strange boy who added me to WeChat that night, perhaps, sometimes each of us is a bit like this innocent child, when we hear something, we have not yet verified the truth of the matter, or have not yet understood the whole thing, we are hot and eager to make our moral judgments, and then indignantly do justice for Skywalker. But when we know the whole story, you'll find that things are far less simple than we think. Yi Nengjing, who has also been surrounded and suppressed by thousands of people on the Internet, once said to the media: When you don't know a person well, please don't evaluate it easily.
People who have not cried bitterly in the long night are not enough to talk about life. I hope that Wu Qili will be able to avoid the fear of being abused by thousands of people after she bravely says all this, I hope that her life can have a new beginning, and I hope that the second half of her life will also have a "surprise journey".
Arwen: "Pink Daddy" public number manager, young writer, intern dad, graduated from Tsinghua Journalism Institute, served as the editor-in-chief of family education magazines for 5 years, and tv program director, producer, agent for 12 years...