On a business trip to a hotel, a beautiful woman came knocking on the door at ten o'clock in the evening, and she said that she lived next door to me, drank coffee, couldn't sleep, and wanted to talk to me. I gladly let her in

On a business trip to a hotel, a beautiful woman came knocking on the door at ten o'clock in the evening, and she said that she lived next door to me, drank coffee, couldn't sleep, and wanted to talk to me. I gladly let her into the house. She said that her name was Zhang Li, she came to such a tour, I asked her why she did not bring a boyfriend, she said with a bitter smile, I don't know where my boyfriend lives, what his name is. I smiled and said, what a coincidence, I don't know what my girlfriend looks like, what she likes, what she doesn't like. Zhang Li and I looked at each other and smiled, and we felt much closer. Smelling the scent of her body, I was fascinated. I didn't expect to travel on a business trip, and actually picked up a girlfriend, which was really profitable. I whispered, I will be good to you in the future. She snorted, nodded and said, I believe you. We both imagined the future on this dark beach, and we felt extremely satisfied. We agreed that after we went back this time, we would quit our jobs and start our own companies together. We make money together, then buy a new house and a new car, and then we get married and work together until we are old. We also have many children, playing under our knees, calling us mom and dad, and it's beautiful to think about. Drinking Zhang Li's two bowls of fish soup. We each bowl, piping hot fish soup, although a little fishy, but it is really sweet to drink. A bowl of fish soup went into my stomach, and I felt more satisfied than ever. After a night of sleeplessness, a wave of sleepiness struck, Zhang Li's face gradually blurred in front of me, I yawned, my eyes went black, and I slept. I don't know how long later, I slowly woke up and found myself lying in a bathtub with a small note next to it...

2. The female manager's husband died during a ligature operation. It is not easy for a female manager to take her son alone, and I often visit her. Last night I bought a la carte and went to dinner with the female manager. We were eating when her son came back from school with a full face. The little guy said, "Mom, Mom, I was praised by the teacher today!" The female manager was very confused when she heard it, because her son was often criticized, so she asked him: "How did the teacher praise you?"? The little guy grinned: "The teacher said, of all the students in the penalty station today, I stand the straightest!" ”

3. Just after the End of the Year, my daughter ran over and said, Mommy and Daddy, can you bear me another brother? Me: Didn't you always want your mother to have a brother, and you wouldn't regret it when your mother gave birth? My daughter said very firmly: I understand now what a stupid thing it is to not have a brother, and I feel that I do not regret it! Me: Girl, how did you figure it out? Daughter: Because I want a younger brother, he can help me bear a little more, I really don't have more money to spend for you!

4. When a friend goes to Mount Wutai to find a high-ranking person, the friend asks: What is Zen? The tall man did not speak, took him to the door of a hotel, let him stand outside, ordered a table of good wine and good food, and ate it. After a while, my friend asked: How long do I have to stand? Takato: How does it feel? My friend swallowed: I feel like I'm hungry now! Gao Ren laughed: This is gluttony! Get it, come in and settle the account for me...

5. Just jumped to the new company, the hostess came three times in the morning, and the people who came each time were different. At noon, I invited an old employee to dinner and told me about the way to survive in this company. He said: "Don't offend single female employees, don't pursue single and beautiful female employees, because one day she may be the future boss of the company!" ”

6. It was still raining heavily outside, and from the balcony I saw a little boy on the side of the road carrying a school bag and walking with an umbrella. A red Mazda cart drove fast, splashing all the way as it passed him. The child reacted quickly, pointed the umbrella at the side of the car, the window was half open, and splashed the woman's body on the co-pilot. Only a scream was heard, and then the car stopped and came down a man's. I thought the child was going to suffer a loss, who knew that the child jumped into the water and stomped on it, splashed the man's body, and then ran into the residential building next to it and disappeared...

7. After the elder sister returned home from vacation, she didn't know why she and her brother-in-law had a big fight. Neither of them admitted their mistakes, and the brother-in-law's temper was also sharp, so I hurried to persuade the elder sister. Me: "Sister, brother-in-law is usually like this, you have been so sharp, he can't swallow this breath!" The elder sister sneered, "Oh, it turns out that he wants to swallow his breath, good!" "After saying that, I went to the bedroom and came out with a baseball bat...

8. The history teacher was bored with his lectures, and I didn't listen to him much. This afternoon, the history teacher was lecturing on the podium, and I listened to the song below, afraid that he would come down and see it, so I asked my colleagues to help me with the wind. I patted my table mate on the shoulder, then pointed to my ear with headphones on, to the teacher, and then to my mouth. Meaning I was listening to a song, and the history teacher came down and called me. My two-table mate nodded thoughtfully, and then said loudly: History teacher, I am listening to a song at the same table, let you lecture a little and don't disturb him!

 #Funny# #搞笑段子 #