Click on the small card below to follow Dr. Aquamarine
There is practice, there is companionship, there is strength
Hailan Happy Home 2022 8th practice story
--------------------
1
At eight o'clock in the morning, I was ready to go to my uncle's house to pick up the baby.
Before going out, I saw my baby father lying on the couch brushing TV, invited him to pick up the baby together, and thought that it would be twenty minutes away to go back and forth, and it would be healthier to walk around.
Baby Dad waved his hand, refused to go, a bitter melon face, lamented that he had a gout, and his feet hurt and he couldn't walk.
Well, well, I'll go myself.
Picked up baby and went home. The house was quiet, and there was no shadow.
He slipped so fast?
I quickly pulled my phone out of my bag, nothing, no missed calls, no messages, no voice.
I started to get angry.
As soon as I walk on my front foot, you go out on your back foot, which is basically planned.
Just pretended that his legs hurt and couldn't walk, what about this?
As soon as the bird friend shouted, even the rolling belt would struggle to go, what leg pain, it was simply a lie!
There is not a single phone call to confess, aren't you afraid of my nagging? Aren't you afraid I'm in the way? So disrespectful!
I was furious.
Who do you think you are? Want to go back, want to go away, my home is a hotel or a hotel, go out even a hello without hitting?
No way!
2
I called over and asked where my dad had gone.
Can't take care of the child at the foot of the oh oh, directly annoyed, tell him not to argue.
On the other end of the phone, my husband pretended to be relaxed and said that he had gone to drink tea.
Are you so active in drinking tea? Go to tea at eight or nine o'clock?
Believe you' weird.
A crackle.
Baba giggled and tried to get through the confusion and defend himself as drinking tea.
Sentence by sentence, I debunked his sophistry and pointed it straight to reality.
Baby Dad couldn't stand it, unable to cover up, had to say go back and say it again, go back and say it again, now it's inconvenient, want to hang up the phone.
Wow wow
Still not relieved.
If you don't make me feel better, I won't give you a good life.
Bullet-like messages were fired out, all kinds of moral accusations, threats were sent online, and several were sent in a row, when I typed "Why are you so deliberate, when I'm gone, just sneak away?" When these few words were said, it was as if there was a bang in my head, and I was hit by something.
Especially when I saw the two words "stealing", my heart suddenly burst with inexplicable sadness, and I felt that I was particularly wronged.
It was at this moment that I sensed that I had relapsed from an "old wound," and although I didn't know what it was, I knew I was aroused.
3
I stopped the desire to continue blaming.
Seeing that I was not replied to, I asked myself, baby dad stopped responding to me, is it a big benefit or a big disadvantage to the development of things?
Lee da.
Because no matter how he responds to me, I can always find a breakthrough to attack him.
That's the way it used to be.
Baba responds to me, I am angry, because his response will stimulate me even more, make me angry, I will reply to him one by one;
Baba didn't respond to me, I was angry, because he didn't respond to me, he just didn't respect me, made me angry, and I insulted him one by one.
Whatever he does, it's wrong and it's going to make things worse.
I don't know what I want to do.
Now, in the moment I close my eyes, I know that stopping is the best, whether he stops or I stop, as long as he stops, it won't take things to a more extreme point.
My heart calmed down a bit and I started taking care of the baby.
When the baby slept, I went back to the study, gently closed my eyes, returned to the scene just now, and felt the heartache and sadness of the sentence "When I am gone, I will sneak away".
Yes, I was really sad and sad, and the corners of my eyes began to moisten, although I didn't know why.
Feel the body, experience the sadness of the present moment, and suddenly the picture of the past appears in the mind.
4
I have an aunt.
When I remember her, she was very old and very old, and when she didn't smile, her face was already wrinkled, and when she laughed, she was even more wrinkled, wrinkled. As soon as she smiled, she revealed her only big yellow teeth, which sounded really ugly, right?
But I think it's the most beautiful tooth in the world, that crumpled face is the most beautiful face in the world, and that smile is the warmest smile in the world.
Mom said, I was brought up by my aunt.
I don't remember.
All I know is that My aunt is super fond of me and I'm super fond of her.
Aunt Xiao never said that I was not good anywhere, I was in her eyes and mouth, everywhere was particularly good.
My aunt said to me that there was a little girl in her village, who was as old as me, maybe even older than me, and was very stupid, and actually threw two cents into the pond.
Two cents, in the countryside in the early eighties of the last century, is still very valuable to children.
I laughed and said the girl was stupid.
Aunt Xiao's voice turned, and she gently stroked my head and said, "My sister will not be so stupid, my sister has always been a smart child." ”
Yes, yes, I won't be so stupid, I am indeed a smart child, sensible and well-behaved, just like the little aunt said.
Every time Aunt Xiao came, she brought me infinite joy, and every moment I was with her, I felt warm as spring.
I like her so much.
5
I don't let her go home.
Sprinkling, tricking, crying, pleading... There are ways to keep her.
"Aunt Xiao, don't you go, you live in my house today, you must live in my house, tomorrow I will let you go."
Before going to school, I took my aunt's hand and begged her over and over again.
She should have tried to reason with me, but I couldn't listen, anyway, she was crying and crying and not letting her go, if she left, I said I wouldn't go to school, I would guard her.
I'm going to be late.
Finally, the little aunt smiled and said, well, well, don't go.
I went to school contentedly.
When I rushed home happily from school, Aunt Xiao left anyway.
I was disappointed, even more upset, sad about why my aunt lied to me, I was a little angry.
But the next time, when Aunt Xiao came to my house again, I was happy again when I saw her chrysanthemum-like smile on her face.
When it was time to go, I couldn't help but beg her not to leave.
However, every time she agreed not to leave, she ended up leaving again.
I had to change my strategy, and before going to school, I repeatedly told her that I must wait until I leave after school, and I must wait until I leave after school!
However, when I was anxious to rush home from school, my aunt left again.
I went from hope to disappointment to grievance and anger.
I already knew you wouldn't stay at my house for one night, and I just wanted you to wait for me to come home from school and let me stay with you a little longer.
Why don't you believe I can do it? Why sneak away?
Why?
In the end, you have to secretly die?
6
Mom said that the aunt was still sweeping the floor in front of the house in the morning, sweeping for a while, telling the neighbor that she was a little tired, going back to the house to sleep for a while, and then, she slept over and never woke up.
Mom said that the neighbors said that the aunt was a person with a particularly good personality, so she had such a good life, and she could sleep like this without suffering so much pain.
Yeah, yeah, it's good to sleep like this, it's good to have no pain.
I should be happy too.
But I can't be happy!
I will never see my aunt again, the one who will always like me, always praise me, always say that I am good.
I am sad.
How could she, like this, sneak away again, and secretly die?
I cried and cried that I would go to the funeral with my mother.
I wanted to see my aunt and said she was walking peacefully, like she was asleep, and I was going to go and see.
But my mother stole away while I was in school, and then came back and said that the aunt had been buried.
The little aunt had been buried.
I'll never see her again.
However, I really missed her.
Thinking too much, I began to hate her, hated why she lied to me, why didn't she believe me?
……
7
The past scenes, just like this, when I was undefended, appeared.
My tears were flowing silently.
It turned out that my need for baba was nothing more than: You tell me that you are leaving, don't lie to me, don't sneak away, I will let you go.
This is actually what I want to say to my aunt.
I always wanted to say it, but I didn't get the chance to say it.
I said these words, closed my eyes, and said them to the most loving aunt in my mind.
I heard my aunt say to me, "Sister, my aunt knows, I'm sorry, my aunt is afraid that you will be sad, so she sneaked away, thinking that you would not be so sad." I don't know if you'll be more upset if you do it. Aunt Xiao did not believe you, but did not know, hugged my little sister, my most well-behaved little sister. ”
I am still the little sister that my aunt loves the most.
Aunt Xiao's love for me has never changed, and I am the same for her.
8
When I opened my eyes and saw my father reply to my message, saying that he had wanted to explain it to me, but then forgot, I believed it.
Baba told me that it was just a small thing, I called him, he told me again, the same thing, he didn't deliberately deceive, I think he was right.
It's really a small thing, and I don't have to be so angry.
Yes, I won't be so angry about it again.
Because of this inward exploration, I healed myself.
Click on your best looks
Hailan Happiness Home Self-Happiness Coach Practice Life: Mengya
Editor: Wang Li
The image comes from the internet. If there is any infringement, please contact to remove it.
Practice every day and become your own happiness coach
Every happiness is the result of self-responsibility