Li Yundi's prostitution has caused a stir on the Internet.
Many people do not understand, with Li Yundi's own conditions, do you need to use it to prostitute?
Some people also wonder, when a single man wants to solve his physical needs, is there really only one way to find a partner?
If the objective situation does not allow you to do this for the time being, such as not meeting the right person, in an environment with little opposite sex, is this physiological need only suppressed in the heart?
Notice, why do I use the term "repression"?
Because of the repressive things, there is generally a gap in the need to vent. Sexuality is such a thing. Therefore, "repression of sexual desire" is, to some extent, a way of control.
Regardless of the impact of this method on the body, it is a more appropriate practice to control your sexual desires and solve your physiological needs in a way that conforms to social laws and regulations and ethics.
Of course, not everyone is able to control it well.
For example, two years ago, there was a news that a male student of Beijing University of Technology was recently preparing for graduate school, because he could not calm down. So one day I ran to a toilet in the dormitory.
The male student said that he is currently preparing for graduate school, unable to control his physical needs, and does not want to be controlled by desire. Therefore, he chose to be self-palace.
Like Li Yundi, he could not control his physical needs, so he tried the method by himself and obtained satisfaction by prostitution. And this leads to a question:
Is it really difficult for men to control their sexual desires?
<h1 class="pgc-h-center-line" data-track="118" > men and women present their sexual desire differently</h1>
For sexuality, men and women are really not "born equal".
Roy Baumeister, a social psychologist at Florida State University, found in a study comparing male and female sexual impulses that men reported more spontaneous sexual arousal and more frequent and diverse fantasies.
In 2005, the UK conducted a massive cross-cultural Internet survey (more than 200,000 participants from 53 countries) on self-reported sexual impulses and social sexual behaviour (basically how restrictive people are about their sexual attitudes and behaviors).
The results show that in all cultures, men's sex drive is higher than women's, sexual attitudes are not restricted, and women's sex drive is always more variable than men's.
The so-called "changeable" means that even women themselves do not know how to stimulate their sexual desires – at least much more complicated than men to stimulate their own sexual desires.
And women's desires "are more contextual, more subjective, more layered." Women are trying to talk first, connect first, and then have sex.
Men hardly need as much imagination because "sex" is simpler and more direct for them. As long as there is a beautiful-looking, hot-looking girl standing in front of the man and acting a little sexier, the man's sexual desire will be stimulated.
That is, it is only when they start having sex and are able to enjoy it that women are physically prepared to trigger their true desires. And men can prepare their physical desires before the sex begins.
Most studies have shown that sexual tendencies — including spontaneous sexual thoughts, uncontrolled or unwanted thoughts, and spontaneous physiological arousal — are more common in men than in women.
This conclusion also applies to the study of the frequency of sexual behavior. Men tend to want sex more than women, either early in a relationship or 20 years after marriage.
These studies are based on biology. In men's blood, testosterone levels are on average seven to eight times higher than in women. Testosterone is associated with sexual desire in both men and women.
Studies have shown that women who take high doses of testosterone report increased sexual activity, arousal, and libido. And a normal, young man, his testosterone level is enough to make him have multiple sexual desires.
Testosterone in men, which begins to decline slowly around the age of 35, usually drops by about 1% per year, but may be faster for some men.
Women's sexual desire, on the other hand, will vary depending on the body's current reproductive state. For example, during ovulation, when the female chance of reproduction is highest, the body tends to maximize sexual desire.
But for women, childbearing is an energy-intensive process that lasts nine months. For men, reproduction takes only a few seconds and there is very little engagement. Because of this, the way a woman's brain is connected limits sexual desire.
As women get older, their biological instinct is to seize the time to finally have children, so the older the woman, the higher the sexual desire. On the contrary, young women have a lower sexual desire, because childbearing is not a difficult thing for them.
So, if a girl criticizes a man and says, why not control her sexual desires, why do you constantly think about these dirty things? In fact, this is "standing and talking without waist pain", because this is the biological instinct of men.
You can't even control your acquired habits of playing less mobile phones, going to bed early, getting up early, and exercising more, not to mention facing the innate instincts of nature - but the former also involves human nature, that is, good and bad work.
Changing places also understands that men's control of sexual desire also requires a certain degree of effort.
Of course, you may wonder why some people can control their sexual desires and some people can't.
<h1 class="pgc-h-center-line" data-track="72" > different cravings for sex</h1>
Why do people need sex?
One of the well-known reasons is to reproduce. But human desire for sex is not limited to this.
From a psychological point of view, humans need sex, not just for reproduction, but also for pleasure and social connection.
The latter two are the root causes of a person's continuous demand for sex.
In related studies found in foreign countries, psychologists asked hundreds of people between the ages of 17 and 52 to create a comprehensive list of why people have sex.
The survey results show that men and women have different desires for sex.
In some emotional motivations for sex, women over men, such as "I want to express my love to that person" and "I realize I'm in love", and under this desire, sex will happen naturally.
These findings are no different from the study described above, namely that women prefer to have sex in ongoing committed relationships than men, and that feelings or expressions of love provide signals of commitment.
Another study supporting this theory suggests that sex without emotional involvement is a more powerful motivator for men than for women.
For example, men prefer something more to do with pure physical pleasure than women, such as wanting to orgasm because they feel good, or simply because they are.
However, it's worth noting that a growing body of research suggests that both men and women sometimes want intimacy and emotional connection from sexual activity.
This is another, more important factor that drives sex: social connection. And this factor, compared to the first two, is more influential.
Because if you simply want to get pleasure, in fact, you can solve your physiological needs at home alone, why do you need to go out and find someone to solve it?
In fact, there is a significant correlation between the status of the individual and the way the sex object interacts.
If your social resources are large and your status is extraordinary, you may obtain more "sex" through your own resources. The pleasure you get from this sex is not only because of the sex itself, but also because of the synthesis of a series of factors in the process of social connection, such as self-identity, the release of emotional values, and the feedback of interpersonal interactions.
Many men with successful careers go in and out of high-end occasions, are called by different female bosses before and after the boss, and various gentle township offensives are actually the embodiment of social values.
So, when your sexual desire is for reproduction, you can control yourself when you don't need it; when your sexual desire needs to get pleasure, you can handle it alone, you can control yourself.
However, when your sexual desire needs to establish social connection with others and obtain physical and psychological satisfaction, then whether it is a one-night stand, a small three or a prostitute, it is difficult to solve it through a person's way.
In fact, recent research in psychology has shown that certain brain chemicals, when having sex with partners, are released as addictive as opposed to sex alone.
Ultimately, sex is really pleasurable because through it, it transcends loneliness in the brain and establishes a physical and mental connection with another person.
To get this kind of social connection, you only need to spend a specific fee, and you can get good results without intervening in emotions.
Don't worry too much about things like falling in love and getting married, and only get in touch with the same person.
And this demand can be controlled by improving personal moral cultivation, but if you do not do it, then you will naturally become the object of criticism.