Breaking up is a severe test of each other's will. However, if you do all sorts of unwise things listed below, you may suffer. Keep in mind that these are some very common phenomena that most people are unaware of. Let's see what you should avoid after a breakup.
1. Stop messaging your ex
You'll want to message your ex to see what he's doing, to let him know that your life is better off without him, and to make him feel remorse. But it's not worth it for you, you'll only be swayed by him, and maybe your actions will only make him more determined – it's time to move on.
2. Don't see each other again
Your brain might disguise it as "hanging out with friends." You pretend to be relaxed in the carnival, and you may smile at each other, as if all the grievances are over. But in fact, you will pay attention to his every move, and the easy behavior can make you have unlimited reverie, is this not self-abuse? Stop at this second!
3. Stop focusing on your ex
You keep your way of communicating with each other, and you are friends after the breakup, showing your open-mindedness. And in fact, in the middle of the night, how long do you look at the message box, longing for his information, how many times his circle of friends has been refreshed, and want to know his situation through dynamics... In this case, you want your ex to remember you and sink into the pain of a breakup. Perhaps, he has come out of the parting hand and has a new partner. Unless you are a masochist, please stop what you are doing now.
4. Never return their stuff in person
This echoes what we mentioned earlier: stop meeting. Even if you need to return your ex's stuff or get your stuff back, you can always ask your friends for help or direct courier.
5. Stop indulging in pain
At first, it was really difficult to control this pain, even to the point of not being able to sleep at night, not knowing the taste, tossing and turning, and in a dilemma. But you have to think that while you hurt yourself, he is free and relaxed, such a contrast, why bother to impose trouble on yourself.
6. Stop mentioning your ex
The more you talk about your ex, for better or worse, the harder it is to forget the relationship. Everything is one and two sides. Only the brave have the courage to be true to their hearts. People who live in other people's worlds are pathetic and miserable, and they have to deceive themselves. It is Lao Tzu who said that there is a way to go. Therefore, Shakyamuni taught the Fa: See me with israel and see me with sound, and you must not see me as it comes.
7. Your friends are not a substitute
This hollow relationship will not bring any benefit. But if you try to mend a broken heart with him, it's even worse. As a result, he will be hurt and you will be ashamed of your decision. If you feel at a certain moment that a friend is very good, suitable for starting a new relationship, forgetting painful memories, then think twice, is this kind of behavior really appropriate?
8. Stop fantasizing
You always fantasize that he will wait for you to come home on a rainy night, hugging you and saying, "I'm sorry, I still can't forget you." You better go take a cold shower and sober yourself up! If you cling to the past and torture yourself with ethereal delusions, you will only make it difficult for you to let go.
There are eight sufferings in life, birth, old age, sickness, death, love and separation, can not be asked, can not let go. When you have tasted all the sufferings of this world, what else can defeat your strong heart?