"Mountains and Rivers" restores a period of vigorous, laughing and tearful contemporary military academy life. A certain artillery academy on the edge of the Xiang River welcomed a new group of cadets, including Li Dalin, who was as silent and tenacious as "Xu Sanduo"; Wang Zhengjun, who was clever and loved to speak cold words; Zhou Shanren, who was affectionate and righteous; and Zhao Duo, who was inferior and timid but sincere. Three years of comrades-in-arms became brothers. In the fiery military school, they studied together, trained together, shared secrets together, and were tested together, with struggles and pursuits, but also full of confusion and troubles. "With the youth of the military school, there will always be a homeland and mountains and rivers in the heart." They entered the military academy with great enthusiasm, and rushed to the vast mountains and rivers without hesitation...
"Mountains and Rivers Looking" by Zeng Jian, Beijing October Literature and Art Publishing House
In September 2018, I entered Beijing Normal University to study for a master's degree in literature and lived in the old courtyard of Lu Xun College of Literature. One night, I dreamed of Li Shumao. He was a classmate of our military academy, we were in a class, and we used to live in bunk beds. We have a good relationship. More than twenty years after we graduated from military school, there were two class reunions during which I happened to have an incident, and I was unable to go, and he never attended. Li Shumao and I have never seen each other after graduating from military school. There are also few phone contacts.
In reality, there are two situations that are rarely related, one is that he has forgotten, and the other is that he has been placed in memory. Li Shumao is in my memory.
The dream, hazy, I don't remember very well, as if he were talking to me, I ignored him, hurt his face, his red face, laughing awkwardly. I used to pull only a tulle curtain at night to let the light outside the window or the morning sun shine softly in, and I didn't like to make the house dark and suffocating. When I woke up that day, the morning sun shone through the white tulle, and the room was as unreal as dreamy. I ignored Li Shumao, and nature was not real. I couldn't ignore him. For a few years at the military academy, we were together. During this period, there were two shift adjustments, I went from the eleventh class to the ninth shift, and then from the ninth shift back to the eleventh class, he was also, and he was also my class president. At the military academy, we were never separated.
What happened in the dream always seemed to happen in reality. I felt guilty and felt that I shouldn't have done that to him. This mood lasts until after breakfast. I'd like to give him a call. When I dreamed of him, I missed him, or did he think of me?
The phone call came over, and it was an empty number. I was persistent, and the more I couldn't get in touch, the more I wanted to connect. I was in our squadron and asked for his phone number. A classmate said that he changed his number for a long time. He sent me the new number, and I played again, and it was still an empty number.
Neither number can be contacted. I didn't think badly of it. I think that it is very normal for people to change their mobile phone numbers now.
After graduating from the military academy, Li Shumao was assigned to border defense, and then returned to his hometown and worked in the public security bureau of Jingbian County, Shaanxi. Jingbian belongs to the Yulin area, and it just so happens that I have a friend in Yulin, so I asked him to inquire about Li Shumao and tell Li Shumao that I miss him very much and hope to come to his new phone number, or let him call me back. That friend, who was quite big, looked for his friend from the Public Security Bureau, and spoke back in half a day, but his voice was very low, and he said, Teacher Zeng, unfortunately, Li Shumao is no longer alive, and he has been gone for almost a year.
I just felt a thunderbolt of a sunny day flying overhead.
Li Shumao, the character prototype of Li Dalin, the protagonist of "Mountains and Rivers Looking", wiped 130 rockets in field training.
I was stunned in my dorm room. I pulled open the tulle curtain and the sun poured in. I stared into the sky, everything was so real, it wasn't a dream. I can't accept that fact, I don't believe it's true. He was in his prime, as his name suggested: leafy.
Heavenly jealousy of talents, it is deplorable!
The wind of the XiangJiang River blew sadly, and the town of Black Stone Shop flew in sorrow. Back then, we came from all over the motherland to the Changsha Black Stone Shop Artillery Yard. At that time, we were full of pride, and we were full of passion. Then we sweated and we weaved dreams. We go from strange to familiar until we become brothers.
At that time, Li Shumao, like us, was so young, happy, tireless, and full of hope for the future. At that time, Li Shumao was simple, generous and benevolent. He helped me a lot. At that time, the squadron often conducted internal health evaluations, and I was a logistics soldier before I was admitted to school, and some aspects were not trained, such as military quilts, stacked like a noodle bun, and internal affairs were often deducted points. During the three months of intensive training, the early morning time was so precious, everyone was so busy, but Li Shumao helped me fold the quilt many times, two or three times, my quilt was sorted out by him, and I also got extra points, which changed my impression of "thin" style in the eyes of the squadron leader. At the beginning of the school year, three months of intensive training (assessment period), the style of "thin pull" is not a trivial matter, and it is not impossible to suffer withdrawal. To some extent, Li Shumao "saved" me.
I repaid Li with peach and helped Li Shumao wash his clothes several times, and the friendship of the revolution was thus concluded.
Li Shumao's skin is slightly dark, his hair is up, slightly fat, and his movements are not as agile as ours. He looked slightly older than us, and we all affectionately called him Lao Mao, and I sometimes called him "Mao Ge" as well. Military schools are not allowed to call brothers and brothers, I occasionally call them so, casually, I think he has the heart and courage of a brother. Once a field meal, the squadron delivered food. The meals of each class were all prepared in two aluminum basins, and when they were halfway through, Li Shumao got up, wanted to add vegetables, approached, looked at the basins, and folded back. There are not many dishes in the pot. This detail of his touched me. Like a brother, he knows humility.
Many times, Li Shumao called me "Zeng Jian", I walked over and asked what was going on, and he said it was all right. Then look at me and laugh. He amused me, cold humor.
I had several "skin kisses" with Mao Ge, and it was in the college's large bathhouse, and we rubbed each other's backs. I was a hundred and eight pounds at the time, and I was very thin. Once, I soaped him and walked his hands on his fat but not fat back, envious. I said, "Blessed are your flesh." He laughed and said nothing, which was a tacit acquiescence. Who knows that life is impermanent, this "blessing" came to an abrupt end when he was rich and powerful.
In the military school graduation exam, I did not pass the shooting, leaving a make-up exam. Ashamed, sad, filled with fear of retakes, I almost broke down. The time to report to the unit is tight, and the students rush to their own things, and Li Shumao is no exception. Before leaving, he comforted me: It's okay, don't be so stressed, don't you have seven days to make up lessons, you listen carefully to the teacher. Rest assured, the make-up exam can be passed.
At that time, how much I needed comfort!
After giving me a hug, he left and said goodbye, I didn't expect it, but we haven't seen each other since.
Li Shumao, the protagonist of "Mountains and Rivers", is with his classmates (Liu Tongyu, rear) during the live-fire exercise at the Qishan Shooting Range.
I've actually always wanted to see him. It's just that I don't think there's a hurry, and the time is there.
One day in August 2017, I got a call from him. When I heard his voice, I was particularly excited. He asked me how I was, and I said it was fine. I asked him how he was doing, and he said, okay. His voice was not very loud, I didn't care, he was from Shaanxi and never spoke with a heavy nasal voice.
At that time, I was driving to Fushun, which was not suitable for answering the phone, and I had just gotten my driver's license, and I was a novice and did not dare to talk much. I said, I'm driving, call you at night.
Interviews in the afternoon, dinner and chat at a farm in the evening, forgetting to call him back. I didn't expect that that short conversation was the last voice he left for me. Looking back now, it turned out that at that time, he was seriously ill. But he didn't tell me. He told me I would definitely go see him. On that phone call, he wanted to stop talking. Does he have any trust? He fell ill tomorrow morning, but he said, "Okay!" "He is such a person, emotions are not easily exposed, difficulties are buried in the heart, everything for the sake of others, just like that field meal, when he saw that the dishes were not enough, he quietly retreated to the side.
In the Spring Festival of 2018, I called him to say hello, it was an empty number. I think he changed the number, didn't think much about it, and contact it later. Until I dreamed of him that night in Luyuan. Who knew that when he woke up from a dream, he got bad news.
I was remorseful, I pounded my head, knowing that I might as well not inquire into him, let us have a good feeling, imagine that he is still "blessed" to live.
However, I had to face the reality that Li Shumao, our old Mao, my Mao brother, he was gone. The past is still faint, and the eyes are covered with tears.
Jingbian County is remote and borders Inner Mongolia, and the police station where Li Shumao is located is even more remote. Because of the remoteness, remoteness, the location is special, and there are many police. Saying that he is back to the place is actually busier than in the army. Always on duty. It was hard to catch up with the rest, and there were often sudden alarms, so he had to go. Work pressure, irregular eating, poor rest, in such a remote town, a stay is ten years, from the police to the police station deputy section level squadron leader. He became ill with overwork and had liver disease. His lover asked him to apply to be transferred back to the county to work, but he refused. He said, there must be someone to stay here, all thinking of pulling back, who is guarding here?
He was sick, but he kept dragging his feet. That morning, he vomited a mouthful of blood and went to a local hospital for examination, which was in the late stages. Doctors began giving him blood transfusions. He followed his family into the hospital, and after that, he never walked out of the hospital again. On July 11, 2017, this tragic day, Mao Ge left us forever.
I looked out the window and looked at the sky high. God is unfair, I hate not being able to grab a stone and hit the sky to vent my inner grief.
Mao Ge just walked away, with his attachment to life. He is gone, his children have lost their loving fathers, his wives have lost their warm husbands, and we have lost good brothers and good comrades-in-arms!
I couldn't help myself, I informed us of the bad news of Li Shumao's death, the former leader of the Ninth Squadron of the Changsha Artillery Academy, and posted this news in the WeChat group of the Ninth Team, and the students spontaneously donated love money to Mao Ge's two children to fund their schooling. On September 11, 2018, assigned by the leaders of our former Ninth Squadron, Jing Fuyun and I, another military school classmate, went to Li Shumao's house on behalf of another military academy classmate, and handed over the love money 35205.20 to his two children. "3", representing Li Shumao's wife, children and daughters, 5205.20, means "I love you, I love you". After that, accompanied by Li Shumao's family, we went to his grave to pay tribute to him. We gave him a toast and flowers. Mao Ge's grave was not far from his work unit on the outskirts of the town, and the woods were not dense, and the grave seemed lonely and desolate. My tears welled up. The deceased is the eldest, I knelt in front of Mao Ge's grave, prostrated my head three times, and wanted to say a few words, but I could not cry. Jing Fuyun burst into tears and expressed the meaning of all our Ninth Squadron: First, I wish Li Shumao a good journey and a good rest! (We know that he is not far away, he has been waiting for the brothers of our Ninth Squadron to give him the last journey) Second, please rest assured that the more than one hundred and forty brothers of our Ninth Squadron will always care for his children and treat them as their own children, and we will help them in their difficult times.
I love Mao ge. Every comrade in our Ninth Squadron loved him. I believe that he will be able to feel this love in heaven, and his heart, tormented by illness, will be soothed by this love.
The green mountains weep, the earth is sad, the water is whimpering, and the birds are wailing. Brother Mao was gone, his voice was still there, and his aura lasted forever. Mao Ge was with us forever, he never died, he only left temporarily. He was just choking us like usual, afraid of the smell of smoke, going to a corner to smoke a cigarette, and soon he would extinguish the cigarette butts and come back to us.
I waited for him. He liked to smoke, and I, who never smoked, prepared a cigarette for him. I was so uncomfortable, I waited for him to come and sit down. I drank tea and he smoked. We talk. I would love to tell me what he wanted to say on the phone that day but didn't say.
As early as five or six years ago, I wanted to write about my military school years, which were important to me and changed my destiny, but at the same time, I felt that the story was plain. We are artillery academies, all male citizens, no tearful love stories; in peacetime, non-special operations units, non-special positions, it is difficult to shine. I think that such a life, written out, must be bland, the word "bland" hindered me, I did not dare to write for a long time.
At that time, when Li Shumao returned to Luyuan, I hadn't written anything for seven days, and my eyes had always been his lonely grave. Seven days later, I put down the half-written novel I had written and started writing about him. I write about him, I write about me, I write about our military school life. Of course, this is fiction, with elements of fiction. But even with fiction, the work remains real—emotionally authentic.
The novel was originally titled "Black Stone Shop" and published in Chinese Writers, No. 8, 2020. Thanks to "Chinese Writers", thanks to the October Literature and Art Publishing House, let my Mao Ge, come out of my memory and walk into my words.
Mao Ge Immortal!
About the Author
Zeng Jian, who joined the army in March 1990, is a graduate student and master of arts in modern and contemporary literary creation jointly organized by Lu Xun College of Beijing Normal University, and a member of the Chinese Writers Association. He has published more than 3 million words of novels in "People's Literature" and "Contemporary", published and published long novels such as "Guns and Roses", "Growing in the Sun", and "Black Stone Shop"; the novel collection "Outpost on the Ice Row", "Wrangler in Military Uniform", "Jade Dragon Lake", etc., and has won many literary awards inside and outside the military, such as the first prize of the short story award in the military theme of the whole army.
(Editor-in-charge: Chen Mengxi)