Yi said that the gathering place for women's growth, may you not wear armor, you can resist thousands of life is not easy, welcome attention.
In "Zhou Sheng As Before", if you want to say that the person who lives the most transparent and free life should be the Feng General Feng Qiao in the palace.
The naïve female general also had a tragic childhood that was not known
Feng Qiao appeared, it was time to prepare to worship the master and enter the palace, she imagined the reservedness of the noble daughter of the family, and learned to smile without showing her teeth, which left a cute impression. When Xiao Yan appeared, Feng Qiao was a little more delicate. Everyone thought that this female general was simple and splendid, but they did not know that this was her transparency after the disaster.
It wasn't until she told her childhood story in order to enlighten Xiao Yan that we found that Feng Qian's life was really pitiful, even tragic. The other division brothers and master sisters all lost their relatives because of the war and defected to Zhou Shengchen and Wang Jun, that is to say, they could hate the chaotic situation of the war, and they could find a life goal for themselves to join the Wang Army, while Feng Qiao could not, she would even hate herself, which would only make herself more miserable.
Because her hatred is challenging kinship and humanity.
She told Xiao Yan that her father would drink and lose money, and when he got drunk, he would scold her and her mother, and if he lost money, he would take away his mother's medical treatment money, and her mother would die because of this. She hated her father, who had caused her mother to die, and all she could do was smash his father's head with something and run away.
For children, the two closest people in this world are the father and the mother, no matter how the parents treat the child, the child will go close to the parents, this is nature, and the reality makes FengQiao see that the father will have fear, hate, and the regret of losing the mother, these feelings are mixed with the cold and warm sorrow of this family, and the heart of Fengqiao is torn by the affection, and this pain may not be able to be experienced by others.
However, if Feng Qiao did not tell Xiao Yan about his past, no one would believe that this Feng general who made the enemy famous and frightened also had moments of fragility and fear, and no one would believe that the cute little sister also had such a painful childhood.
Only those who feel empathy are qualified to advise people not to rest assured
I think Feng Qiao is not very willing to talk about her childhood, but she is willing to open her heart for Xiao Yan and tell a story to Xiao Yan at the same time, it is also a release of her own heart knot.
A person's heart should be often taken out to dry, so as not to be moldy and rotten.
Xiao Yan wanted to go to the other side to pick up Zhou Shengchen and Shi yi, and he had to face his father again. This emperor's father, on the one hand, is the adoptive father who accompanies and raises him, on the other hand, he is a thief hated by the country and the family, or an enemy who has lost his wife and children's lives, which is also a kind of pain that makes people tear up all the time, even if hatred will hurt themselves.
Many times, when we witness the pain of our loved ones, we are often helpless, and even if we want to comfort and explain, we feel that the language is pale and weak. If Zi Feiyu didn't know the pain of the fish, it was better to be quiet and accompany him; if he could feel empathy, he could go to relieve Xiao Yan like Feng Qian.
FengQiao's delicacy is just her attitude towards life, in fact, her emotional intelligence is not under Zhou Shengchen and the right time, she did not persuade Xiao Yan how to face the pain, but told her own story, let Xiao Yan know, your pain I understand, because we have had a similar experience.
Xiao Yan asked Feng Qiao if she hated her father? This is also the biggest knot in Xiao Yan's heart, and Feng Qiao did not tell him whether to hate or not to hate, but said who can still think of him, and now I have the people of Xizhou in my heart.
A word awakened Xiao Yan, some hate and some pain, and did not need to let go or forgive, but no longer put it on the heart, never remember it again.
Forgiveness is never something time can resolve
Many people are familiar with Adler's classic quote: "Happy people heal their lives with childhood, and unfortunate people heal their childhood with a lifetime." ”
Whether it is happiness or unhappiness, it is all faced with a lifetime of time, as if time can solve everything. For a long time, I also thought that time could solve everything. However, after reading FengQiao's words, I also understand that the ability to heal a person's pain is not to forgive or to let go, nor to time, but to the strength of your own heart.
When Feng Qiao smiled lightly and said that who remembered him, she found that the strength that had grown in Feng Qian's heart had already made her go to a broader world, and her heart was the people of Xizhou.
When Xiao Yan left Xizhou, he said that hatred was actually a kind of inability to let go. Indeed, when you have pain and hatred in your heart, when you grit your teeth and say that you must forget a person, in fact, you still put people and things in your heart and are not willing to throw them away, because you can't throw them away at all.
If you compare people's hearts to houses, when you are in pain and fear, you will definitely close the doors and windows, and you will be scared to death. But when you try to open a little window or door with the strength to open yourself, you will find that the sun will shine through the gap and make your heart begin to warm, if you can have the courage to open the doors and windows, let the sunlight accompany more things in, or you go out, only to find that the things you have grasped are not worth worrying about all the time, even if it is hate.
Just like FengQiao, she met Zhou Shengchen, met Wang Jun, her martial arts wizards were able to play, and her rescue of women and children in the war became a beautiful story in the mouths of the people. She found the value and purpose of her life, her heart was filled with the people of Xizhou, and the pain she had experienced would no longer be entrenched in her heart.
A person who loses his direction and goals will lose his inner strength, and will let the charm of the fish consume his own life, which is a kind of internal friction.
Many times, let yourself put down into a cover for the bell, let yourself forgive into a moral kidnapping, let yourself forget that it is to escape the problem, let yourself become an ostrich buried in the sand, even if you do it, you will still be aggrieved, you will be suffocated and even regret and chagrin yourself.
In fact, it is never these things that heal yourself, let alone time, but let yourself grow, have the strength to look at the wider world, the farther future, and focus more energy on what you want to do. Suddenly, one day, you will find that you are also like Fengqiao, you can tell a story or laugh, who can still remember him.
(The pictures are all from the screenshots of the TV series "Zhou Sheng As Old", if there is any infringement, please contact to delete)