Today's kindergarten class is about small animals, and everyone talks about their pets. Lin Lin's family raised cute little white rabbits, Pippi's family raised small squirrels, Xiao Yun's family raised slow little turtles, and Ball Ball's family raised terrible lizards............ Suddenly, sitting in the corner without saying a word, he said quietly, "What's so great about this?" I have a big tiger at home! ”
"Tiger?" When the children heard it, they all gathered around. The children were half-convinced: "Deceitful, huh?" Who's going to retire a tiger?"
"Yes! Tigers can eat people. "The children didn't believe it at first. But Jing Jing said out loud with great certainty, "I didn't lie to anyone!" The Big Tiger was brought back from Dubai by my dad and was given to him by a friend of his. It's like a big cat, gentle enough to never bite. Saying, he quietly turned his head and asked the teacher: "Teacher, there are people in Dubai who make tigers as pets, right?"
The teacher naturally did not believe that JingJing's family had a big tiger, but Dubai has a local tycoon pension tiger as a pet, this matter the teacher has seen the news, so she is not good to deny, only nodded. So Jing Jing said very proudly, "Now you believe it?"
The children were instantly conquered, and the worship of Jingjing was simply incomprehensible, and they all asked around Jingjing, and some children even gave small toys and small snacks in a flattering way, just so that Jingjing promised to take them home to see the big tiger. Jing Jing was proud like a princess, but the teacher knew that it was impossible for her family to raise any tigers.
After school, the teacher quietly told her mother about the situation, and her mother cried and laughed. She said that she and her father may have been quietly overheard when they talked about the news of Dubai's local tycoons raising lions and tigers, so Jingjing fabricated such a lie. The mother promised to educate jingjing well after going back, and never let the child be a "big talk king".
In the minds of adults, "honesty" is a good quality that must be possessed as a good child. Therefore, once they find out that their children are lying, parents are furious and like enemies. In fact, for children aged 3 to 6, "lies" should be distinguished from the nature, and the moral problem cannot be used to buckle the big hat
The son was not yet able to possess a complete moral outlook before the age of 6, so they did not have a clear concept of "true" and "false", "truthful" and "false". They just speak on their own feelings, and as long as they can make themselves happy, if they can escape punishment and blame, they are "right" and "good".
Therefore, when children often say big words, parents should not use a harsh tone or a tone that hurts the child's self-esteem to criticize and stop the child's bad problems because of worry. Educate children in a way that is easy for children to accept. We can do that in life.
First of all, don't be in a hurry, and clearly understand the purpose of the child's big talk.
When a child says something big, as a parent or an adult, the first thing to understand is what the child is going to do when he says this. It is only after understanding the starting point and purpose of the child's "big talk" that it is possible to educate properly.
The reasons why children lie can be divided into the following three types:
The first is self-protection or evasion of responsibility. Sensitive children are very sensitive to the emotions and emotional reactions of adults, and they want more appreciation and caresses from adults in their hearts, rather than accepting punishment. Therefore, when they do something wrong, or do not meet the expectations of adults, they will make up lies in the hope that adults will believe and "let them go".
The second is due to the child's rich imagination. In the child's world, reality and fantasy are often confused. Children at this age have wild imaginations, strong desires, lack of experience, and inaccurate memories. Both cause the child to take his imagination as reality. At this time, "lying" is only describing the real situation in their minds, and has nothing to do with character.
The third is to gain the attention of others. When children want to get the attention of adults or people around them, they will also say some "big words" to attract the attention of others. Sensitive periods of sexual desire in children aged 3 to 6 years also occur as they age. Especially after having a collective life, in order to "highlight" themselves or please adults, children often say some "big words" that are inconsistent with reality, which is often understood by adults as "lying".
Distinguish the type of "lying" of children, and parents can be targeted in the process of educating their children. Don't expect too much from your child and put too much pressure on them; Don't pay too much attention to the lies of young children, help them figure out the difference between reality and imagination, this is a gradual process. Do not arbitrarily "label" children, once children carry the burden of "lying" and "big talk king", their hearts will be overshadowed, this label will only play a reinforcing role, let them think that they are a "big talk king", and its impact may even last a lifetime. Of course, as children grow older, adults should gradually help children establish honest and trustworthy morals, so that they can become an upright person.
Second, teach children not to be impulsive and patient.
Some parents see their children "bragging", sometimes inevitably very angry, in a hurry to indiscriminately yell at their children. The child is subjected to this sudden high pressure, psychologically unacceptable, so the effect of discipline is not satisfactory, and even provokes the child's confrontational psychology. When this happens to the child, parents should be calm and have enough patience. Only in this way can we identify the reasons why children say big words, and then use targeted methods to educate.
Third, don't criticize your child in a discriminatory or contemptuous tone.
Some parents know that it is not advisable to yell at their children and criticize them harshly, so they unconsciously speak to their children in a ridiculous tone. For example, "You child, long skill, God first, you second", "here it is again, here it is again, or this set"... This tone of disdain and contempt will hurt the child's heart, they will think, "Mom and Dad don't like me" and "Mom and Dad think I'm bad", in the long run, will make the child's self-confidence suffer a serious blow, the child will slowly become introverted, and dare not reveal his heart in front of his parents.
Also, take your child out more and let him "open his eyes". Full of fantasy, imagination is wild. However, due to his young age, little life experience, and weak cognitive ability, he often confuses reality, imagination and desire and says some "big words". This has a certain relationship with the child's age and psychological characteristics. Let children read more, often take children out to learn in the field, and understand the essential characteristics of things. When the child's cognition is rich, even if the child's imagination is wild, the words spoken will not be out of bounds.